wov this music feels nice:)


yeppp quite happy about studying in this room. and i found a nice radiation information about atmosphere. i wish i could finally code this night finally. i think i would find a thermos for coffee and would not go downstairs to take coffee continously.  or maybe i should do that to lose weight :D or i can use the upstairs from this level to do sports yepp.


i found my study cave:D it feels amazing to find a cave other than the living room whihc never felt comfortable:)



ok lets code:) found a peaceful place to code:) my cave:)


yayyy hgave taken coffee with thermos:) lots of coffee:) (hackathon for sky coding :))))))))



wov : 
https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/earth-and-planetary-sciences/planck-constant

I were wondering about Planck constant andformulas about black body emission. and confronted this amazing article.

so quantum comes from quantizing:) ? wov.

ok i know i need to read alot on these topics later on.


ok i am super happy about this new study place. i can code my game very nice from here. just would buy a ventilator thats all needed.  would buy that tomorrow.

ok now moving to coding part. trials part. i am thinking of doing trials in a jupyter notebook for things i want to render fast as images.  or webgl.  normal pipeline is creating world dbs in scala, and rendering them in webgl. but during this task, maybe i would utilize python also? or lets do it as is, in scala way and create renderings in js side. yepp. or create some image generation in also scala side for testing whether my SH based method would work correct or not.

its 1:41 am:) so its kind of hackathon mood right now:) yepp.




anyway i would sleep with watching mythbusters, something i like alot:)
cause my Onder bro said its not healthy to stay awake this hours. yayyyy my bro would write proposal to DARPA project i mentioned :) nice:) yayyy so me and my bro might work to DARPA maybe? in future? if brothers proposal gets accepted..  in a blockchain project (i alreadly worked in blockchain project before as told) 


but also coding the game awhile also. cause i want to buy a mini island (to run away from stalk of a hamit named sociopath stalker) and create capital to projects with Onder bro in future.


i read new things and rewriting algorithm of SH topic and actuallyt trying tro remember what i designed 3 days ago and redesigning it along with my new readings today.  trying to do thing in SH way which i liked alot.


ok i only want to talk happy things.



ok i a saw SH reference. ok i cant lie it hsa been super cool to be friends with you. but whilst we be friends, i cant code games. and i could only be friends to you when i have a nonproblematic life (when i have a nice life).currently i dont have a nice life. i am trying to solve somethings.
so lets be friends in future?(1 month later) when after i solve my life's proiblems?if you still want to be friends by then, lets be friends in future?(1 month later) as told, if i be friend to you, i wont be able to code the game. all my concentration would go to beign friend with you(since you build super cool projects). so can i ask for being friends in future, maybe 1 month later? after i have game? i saw you talk about SH topics, and it changed my mind on that of being friend to a famous person topic. hmm if i have game, if i could buy a mini island, i can also have a famous friend (cause i would be protected from problems of risks of having a famous friend, that stalkers might stalk since i have a famous friend?) . ok if you still want to be ever friends, could we be friends in future? but just i need a month of concentrated study with no friendships around. is it ok?


i figure out it might be risky to have a famous friend. (since people might want to stalk me since i have a famous friend). but i if i buy a mini island i wont have such problems either. so, if ok, can i ask for a future friendship, after i buy a mini island after my game project succeeds?  if you still want to be friends by then. is it ok?

ok i cant lie its super cool to be friend with you:D but that would also steal all my game attention to reading you. i would constantly read your twitter if we fbe friends. but this 1 month i need to code game alot. and so is it ok, for asking being non friends for 1 month, but being friends in future after 1 months if ever you have time for guhu friend by then?


ok i would be a good friend in future, i promise. i just need to be non friends for just 1 month. is it ok? 
can i please be unreading things you write just for a month? cause i wont be able to code game and instead just read what you write if i read you since you talk about super cool projects.  ok spaceships are super cool. hmm, is it ok if i postpone this friendship a month? that we have an agreement to not talk for a month, but we could be very good friends after a month? is it ok? I promise tyo be a good friend after i solve my own life problems. i really have unrelated problems. i have problems that turned me near to ptsd. or maybe i am not ptsd i dont know.  but the thing is, i really have harsh problems i need to solve asap. can i postpone our friendship just for a month? is it ok? so could we have an agreement to not talk ever just for 1 month. but we could talk alot later than that? if you want to talk, i would be always available to talk, just in one month later, is it ok? i pray its ok:)

i figure out if i build game, and have a mini island, i could also have a famous friend:) cause i could run a way from stalk that might happen since i have a famous friend. :)  restating, my stalk for 3 years(by a hamit named person) isnot any related to talking to a famous friend. but that jhust shown me how bad getting stlaked is. so, i think if i have a famous friend, i mgiht get stalked due to that. but if i have a mini island, stalk wouldnt matter nor applicable:)

hmm so if you still want to be friends, i would be super interested to be friend to you super cool projects creator. but i need one month of no communication. that i do study game with very full concentration. is it ok? i would be super happy if its ok. i would be super happy if i dont lose your friendship. is it ok?

i dont understand why you talk to me whilst i am not genius and you are a famous genius. maybe its because my brother is kind of genius? i dont know why you talk to me:P. but its always super happy to talk to you. and sorry for behaving bad in some period in our talk. i dont know if you would forgive me for such words?


ok could we have such friendship agreement: that we dont talk for a month while i code the game, and i could forever talk any time you want to talk afterwards? is it ok? i wish i dont lose your friendship.


but if you erased me its ok. but i pray you hadnt:)

ok its super cool to see SH topic in your feed:) hello genius friend. i, your asperger like behaving guhu friend (maybe i am asperger? i dont know) asks for a 1 month for being non friends and asks for friendship 1 month later so she could code the game asap. is it ok? i wish i dont lose your friendship so much :) but if you erased me its also ok, but i pray i hadnt lost your friendhsip. so is it ok to ask suych thing as: lets not communicate just for 1 month(while i intensively try to code the game) and communicate afterwards is it ok? i dont want to lose your friendship by saying such thing to you, but i wish i pray saying asking such thing is ok? i want to be friend alot, but after i solve my life problems my own. is it ok? i need just 1 month for that. is it ok? cause if i be friend with you, i cant code the game cause i would be like always reading your tweets since you talk super cool projects and my brain wouldnt have concentration to my game thingy (while a friend talsk abotu space ships, i would be more concentrated to read spaceships instead of coding game:DDDDDDDDDDD) so i wish you understand this request:D ok i pray you hadnt erased me:) but if you erased its ok. but i also pray you hadnt erased me. so i code the game. and i wish so much to be friedns one month later ii would be present to talk whenevber you want to talk to one month later. is it ok? cause if i talk to you now, i wont be able to code my game. cause i would dfixate on reading you, cause spaceships/neuralink/car projects, i just wont be able to concentrate to my game project since your projects are super cool.i wont be able to code the game if we talk. since you work to create super cool projects. is it ok to ask for not talking for one month. and if you still want to be friends after one month, i would be super happy to. cause i need to solve my life problems (that arent any related to you) before talking to you. and i need just 1 month to solve them. is it ok?

I never thought i would have a genius friend that goes to space :) i really have an interesting life.

i wish that friedn hadnt erased me. its ok if erased me (if he thinks i am problematic friend). but i pray hadnt erased me:)


so my promise to you if you ever want to be friends of this silly guhu:    shje just asks for just one month of nontalking/nonfriends time(so that she could code the game without reading super cool topics of space topic, i cant study if i read you, you talk of supercool topics that are way much super cooler than my game. so i wont be able to code game if i read you and all my attention would go to reading you alwayws:) ). and if you still want to be friend after jut only one month, guhu promises to always exist whenever you want to commncte.  is it ok? i wish i dont lose your friendship. for wanting just 1 month of nontalking time. if i read you, i wont have left concentration to my game, cause you talk of super cool/super fun topics that is muych cooler than my game.  so i just ask only 1 month of nontalk, but i would be super duper happy to talk 1 month later, after i solve my unrelated life problems. is it ok? i pray this request is ok:)

maybe i misunderstood and you dont like to talk to me. and it were a coincidnce (the SH topic etc). its ok if thats like that. but if you like to talk to me, it would be super happy to talk to you. i would solve my life problems in one month. i  just need 1 month time to be able to talk to you. if i talk you now, i wont be able to code the game. cause you build super cool projects, and i would not have left any attnetion left to build my game. and i need to build game to solve my life's problems. so if you like to talk to me, lets talk 1 month later, after i solve my life's problems, i wish this request is ok:) and i pray i dont lose your friendship with such request:) hello:) its always happy to see your references:) but lets just only dont talkj fr 1 month? that i code the game whilst to solve my own life problems. then i would be super happy to continue talking? i pray i dont lose your friendship with such request of mine. hello:)



ok lets make this like that: i would create a party in mini island i would buy and you would be invited to the party with your friends. i just want 1 month for to be friend with you. is it ok? so let this invitation stay here:) you are invited from now:) to such future event with your friends/family :)

so for a while for a mohnth, i would talk all game topics. and get lost in coding game. but this invitation stays here:) and i would be super happy if you intend to come to such event in future. if you are interested to know this silly guhu/be friend of. i would be super levels of happy to be friend to you.


so i go on talking of game topics/geting lost in game topics. but i wish i dont lose your friendship for such request of getting lost in coding game for a month in my side? i pray i dont lose your friendship due to such request(that i get lost in coding game universe for a month?).   and as told I would be super happy to invite to such future party 1 month later after i build my game:) inviting you/your friends/your family if ever interested :)  it would be quite super happy for myside :) 


 (i dont know if i misunderstood so dont know whether it were coincidence or were intntlly said like that? that SH coincidnce? its super happy to be friend with you:) just wanted to note:) if thats not a coincidnce fo topics and intentionally done by you. )

(hey its best we dont communicate for a month whilst i code the game to solve my life problems. i have got a sociopath stalker named hamit that even makes your name be impersonated(the impersonator talks our local language. it is not you(a short guy impersonates you). an impersonator of you.  to catch my attention/to decieve you/me/people, the sociopath hamit does everything to decieve people, calls your name to another person(that is not you) and uses sentences to deceive surrounding with that. the sociopath hamit does everything to decieve people/you/me.  so if you like to be friend, lets be friend when i solve my life problems like the stalker sociopath hamit issue. i would solve that with buying a mini island in future(so that stalker cant ever stalk, since it would be a mini island) and if you like me, you/your friends/family to party events if ever interested to be friends ever :) i dont know if you like to be friedns, but if you do so, always invited :) ) (can you imagine how difficult it is when i have got such a sociopath stalker that even tries to impersonate you and uses your name to impersonate you. and talks our local language. its not you. lots of deceival things are done. i need to save myself from hamit named, this horror movie like sociopath's stalk asap. and i would fix my life conditions in na month. and if you would like to be friends, always invited to parties in new place i live,  you/your family/your friends, invited.   woman shouted outside your name sayuing a Turkish sentence. these peorple use the person i am fan of to deceive surrounding. they impersonate the person i am fan of. its not the only sociopathy act be done. they also give me aliases or other sociopathic things i confront. so if you like to be friends, lets be friends after i fix this severe degree sociopathy issue i confront. (i would fix it with buyign a mini island. so that these impersonator/sociopaths cant disturb me since it would be an island, they wont be able to come to stalk). and you/your family/your friends always invited:) i wouild create parties and you are always invited if ever wanting to be friends. it would be super happy to be friends with you:) but for that, i need to first fix my own life problems, and i could fix them in one month. these people visiblyt read my blog 3 years ago, and started impersonating your name whilst stalking me. its all as i get articulated by a sociopath named hamit. anyway i would solve my own problems like confronting sociopathy in one month. and i would be super happy to be friend wiuth you after that if you are ever inverested to, i would be super happy to be friend of you:).  (I dont know if you are interested or not also:)) i have very big problems like sociopaths stalk(a hamit named socio). i need to fix that than i would be super happy to be friends if you are ever interested to:))

the woman shouted outside a sociopathic sentence saying-> "ilan unut" (i ddnt said this sentence, i would never shout such sentence.  they outside woman shouted  this sentence to an impersonator of you whihc is not you/its said to an impersonator of you. you are impersonated by my stalker. they impersonte you.  these people started doing such acts any type of impersonation activity 3 years ago. i wish i never blogged i am a fan of you and these impersonators would never learn that i am fan of you. and they use that fact they learnt from my blogs, to try to decieve me/people/you/all. i dont any understand why any person would take someone's name. its super sociopathy. i am confronting impersonators/a super degree of sociopathy. so please lets not communicate for a month while i save myself from such situaiton:)(if we would communictt with references, lets not do that whilst i focus on game to save myself my own problems), whilst i save myself from sociopathy with buying a mini island and coding a game for that. hmm then you are always invited to parties and i would be super happy to be friends if you are ever interested to:)   but please give me some time to code game to save myself from sociopath hamit's stalk before that:) so that, we dont ever communicate with references for just one month, and but after 1 month, you are always invited to parties if ever interested to:)  my first party celebration would be titled to being saved from stalk and  you are definitely invited if you are ever interested to, you/your friends/family all invited. if ever interested.  impersonating you is not the only sociopathic act thats done, worse things are done, like i told, giving me aliases/fantasy worlds crafted that are super disturbign. i need to save myself from confronting sociopathy asap with coding a game and buy a mini island. then i would celebrate that moment with a party (the end of socipath hamit's stalk event) and you are and your friends all invited if ever interested :) (dont know if you are interested? maybe it were just a coincidence, i dont know if it were coincidence or not? if its not a coincidence, you are definitely invited to parties:)  if it were a coincidence, then you wont come to any party as i get) if you are interested to commncte ever, please give  me just one month. and never get deceived by sociopaths that sometimes comes around my house. that ilan name is not you, they impersonate you.  please not in any way communciate for just only one month and while that time i code my game/i save myself from that hard situation i tell, then we could communicate wheenevr you like to talk to and always you/your family/your friends always invited to my events/parties if ever interested:) i would be super happy to commuinciate with you, but after my lfie is saved from this hard state. i would save my life from sociopathy in one month. and then i could communicate any time you would like to ever interested to talk to. and you/your friends/your family always invited to parties:)  (i dont know if you are any interested to communicate me. but this invitations is for if you are interested to:)  but would invite you/your friends/family to parties after one month, if you people are ever interested to. )
)


so guhu gets lost in coding game topic just for a month? is it ok? :) i pray so bad its ok:) (I dont want to lose your friendhsip :) ) (dont know if you are friend to me either:D cause it were just a coincidence, maybe you arent any related/not any friend. if you are, you are invited to future party event with your friends/family:)  I would try to create such party thing in very recent future, 1 months later from now.


 



----

ok today:
today i bought ventilator with mom yepp so made my study room better.

 
----
ok my life is really like that comedy zombie moivie where the residents dont accept zombie acolapyse happen:D the stalkers came around house's park and i tried to show to mom and dad and they behaved as if those people are jobless people that are ignorant and jobless and  mom and dad ddnt6 let me talk me saying that they are related to zombie like psycho sociopath whom stalk me. the sociopath crafts lies and i just try to show mom and dad but they dont even let me talk:S thinking i am in trauma and confuse just strangers as stalkers that stalk me. whilst i heard these people name my name so they must be related to sociopath stalkers. ok this is really like that zombie movie where the residents are super blind to zombies.

ok guhu stay calm and code the game and not stress. when mom and dad doesnt listen to me and behave as if i am in ptsd and dont accept that psycho things talking people in park named my name. ok they ddnt let me talk. they behave as if i am in trauma/ptsd of stalk of sociopath. whilst i definitely heard that guy sociopath named my name in outside that people are related to the sociopath hamit that stalks me cause i also heard hamit name.

ok my mom anbd dad are super stupid. i dont know what to do. ok i know what to do. i would code the game and save myself. my mom and dad behave me as if i am ptsd. and dont let me show the stalk. these psychos told ada name which i heard in stalk incidents alot. and also ege name also. so these must be articulateed by the hamit named sociopath. and the sociopaths even named my name. but mom and dad are watching tv. not even listening me. behaving me as if i am a ptsd. whilst zombies really come and stalk like sociopath. people i have the most stupid mom and dad in world.
the guy said my name in a sociopathic sentence. and mom and dad ddnt even heard. and they said those are jobless poeple psycho [people and i ocnfuse as stalkers and mom and dad think i confused since i am in trauma. ok these mom and dad i have are super stupid. its like that zombie movie where residents act so slow to real zombies:S that they behave so unaccepting tor eality. i have got a sociopath stalker thats like a zombie and names my name in sociopathic sentencees even. but mom and dad behaves as if i am ptsd. ok this is super tragicomic situation. it has really comic aspect. so maybee that movie is an analogy to p[eople stalked and other people whom dont listen that. i wish i could share the link fo that zombie movie. its super funny actually. ok getting stalked bya  sociopath is super hard thing. the hamit named sociopath articulates people and mom and dad dont listen to me. these psychopaths also shouted "they couldnt do her kava". so these people has an agenda of turning me to a kava whatever it is. is not it like zombie movies:S whilst mom and dad doesnt believed that these people outside are stalkers, to them they are jobless people who are psycho and jopbless and people to be pitied. and when i try to start talk that they are stalkers that stalk me, their reaction is as if i am ptsd. this is really like that zombie movie where ssome people reject zombies:S ok life is really tragicomic sometimes. i think i also wanto laugh to this trageida like situation of getting stalked by a sociopath who tries to make me a kava whatever shit is, and mom and dad behaves as if i am in trauma and in ptsd, and that i confuse those normal psycho jobless people as the sociopath stalker which stalks me. this is really a tragedia. this is really also like a comedy movie also:S  I have  gt a sociopath stalker and mom and dad behaves as if stalkers are nomral jobless people that we should pity but not the sociopath stalkers. and they dont listen me and behave as if i confuse those people as the stalkers while they actually are. they named my name in a sociopathic sentence. mom and dad behaves me as if behave like due to ptsd. i might have little bit ptsd but these people are really stalkers. and mom and dad are the dumbest mostg unlistening mom and dad in life. my mom and dad are super stupid to not listen to me:S anyway. i should save myself myself in such situation while noone helps ina  sociopath stalking me situation.the sociopath creates lies in a continuum and constantly stalks me. and when i try to show to mom and dad, they dont listne to me behav ing me as if i am in truama and confusing things.

thyis mom and dad, are the dumbest mom and dad in life ever:S heu mom and dads never be any stupid nonlistening mom and dad as my mom and dad ever:S

these people also named sedat/hamit/oguz names. these are names i heard alot.  they also said "can should get over". i also heard can name alot all these 3 years. so these popel are articulated by that sociopath hamit. i have got a hamit named sciopath stalker that stalks me like this and noone ever helps me. its a super hard life:S gives me aliases. stalks me in constant stalk in every city 3 citiuese up to now. impersonates people. as told took names from my blog to impersonate. impersonates the guy i am fan of with a short person who talks our local language. impersonates person i am fan of also.  a high degree of sociopathy of impersonation/constant stalk of me/gtiving me aliases. all rooting from moriarty stalker from ferikoy a hamit named psycho stalker. i know stalker is from ferikoy since started in ferikoy.

constant effort to make me mentally ill. constant lie creation about me. constant impersonation. a real moriarty stalks me. a sociopath. a hamit named socipath. it firs started shouting ork and shouting hande. than other names. i thought those names are stalkers. turned out this people try to assing me aliases. a sociopath stalks me. dehumanizes me. for 3 yearts. and noone helps me ever. and mom and dad thinks i am ptsd and when i show them stalkers they behaved as, they are normal jpobless psycho people and that they dont listen me and they think as i beens talked with cursdes, they think every time i hear a curse, i show ptsd behavior of confusing such people as stalkers.  they said me those peopl,e are psycho jobless people who curse alot. and that we should pity to them and they just ddnt listen to me when i tried to show them they are the sociopaths whoms talk me. mom and dad thinks i am in trauma and they think every time i hear a curse i think they are stalkers. they think i behave like this due to ptsd.  they dont even listened to me to listen to their talk. they just dont want to help me. if they listened they would hear the names that stalked me for 3 years. they even named my name in a sociopathic sentences. the sociopath whom stalked me in istanbul beside dehumanizing me also shouted me curses alot. and stalked me also in ankara. is like a moriarty.constantly crafts sociopathic lies about me. cponstantly shouted me ork. constwqantly stalked me. gave me aliases. and has some p[ower visibly. could do those acts in 3 cities. so is like a real moriarty. i have got a sociopath moriarty like stalker named hamit.tears fell from my eyes. as having a moriarty like stalker and noone helps me. and i fight it all alone. i figure out whomever this moriarty hamit is, must be a powerful sociopath cause could stalk a woman like this. stalk started with giving aliases and shouting ork also beside. then stalks me constantly. has power to articulate poeple to stalk me. i first thought hande is a stalker of me. turned out its an alias this sociopath assigns to me. and constantly stalks me like this for 3 years. and i fight alone. so must i be a suiper strong person and stop tears. lets code game. and buy a mini island and this moriarty cant come to the mini island i would buy to stalk me with sociopathy like this.


ok i am super strong. and not gonna care when sociopath crafts sociopathy and ork sayings and sociopathic sentences. i wouldnt go outside from my room . i wouldnt go outside and confront possible stalk again. we had relatived guests today so i had to go outside. and the stalkers were in the park as i get. there is a park in front of our house. anyway. agenda to deal with this stalk/sociopathy confronting situation:  I stay in my shelter, which is my room that is immune to sociopathy. cause as told i have constant music on so if sociopath outside in park shouts sociopathic sentence it wont reach my shelter:)


i would code the game and buy a mini island. which would be another shelter and the place i would get over trauma compltly.


i would when i buy my mini island, i would craft parties as i told and invite friends as i mentioned invititng genius friend(him and his friends and his family) if he ever likes to be friend with me. if he doesnt want to be any friend, of course he wont come.  i would create many events with all only friends invited yepp. ok i am intellgnt and i woukld get over trauma super fast. my brain would suepr fast heal.  and i would live in places this socioapth stalker hamit cant come.  like my mini island i would buy after i code the game.or far away cities. i would but definitely buy a mini island. lets continue coding game. ok i might be unlucky to get stalked by amoriarty named hamit, but i am also very lucky cause i am a coder, i can create a game and buy a mini island and save myself from stalk. so i am both super unlucky and both super lucky person. yepp. so chance/luck is not evenly distributed. and sometimes both luck and unluck comes to a person. like living in a trauma creating situation but also being a coder whom could and would code a popular game. ok life is weird:D

as told, if genius entrprnr wnts to be friend, always invited to parties/to my future mini island:) if he doesnt want to me and if it were just coincidence, then he wont come/attend. i would be super happy to be friends if he likes me:) but as told, as seen, i have very urgent tasks to do like coding a game and buying a mini island, so i just would be in game coding world for a month, that i would fall in to a game coding universe like state:P and after i fix my life, after one month, i would, craft parties and he is(and his friends/family)_ is definitely invited:) (if he likes me. if he doesnt likes me (if he doesnt want to be any friends) than he wont attend. if he liks me, i would be super happy to be friends:))

ok lets fall in to game coding universe:)




ok by the way religious people i want to say i respect religion topic. i just am atheist.  i mean i wish that topic about religion etc wrnt offensive any. i respect religion. i just like being atheist but i also respect religion topic.





----------------

by the way the cockroach examplifyer giver chemical engineer uses our local news to try more of such narrative of cockroaches. hmm since i told i have felt no reaction to it, the chemical engineer's chemistry got broken and intends to do such acts more with creating such act. ok again i felt nothing(neither insulted nor hurted).cause this is not hmm i dont know but i do think this is funny. to have such haters:D this is really funny:D and i neither get hurted nor insulted.and found this act kind of pathetic actually and also funny.  chemical engineer's chemistry got broken and attacks! ok after some eq points, how people behave looks super stupid sometimes. ok this looks like a masturbation of some chemical engineer of or such act. i mean it from a higher eq point, looks like, this chem eng. takes satisfaction from such acts and repeats it in today. this guy takes satisfaction from such acts. thats my analysis from this. sometimes, at higher eq points, things looks like this that sometimes things looks like if people are trying to feel satisfaction from scuh acts and it looks like a masturbation from outside. the chem eng masturbated in all our eyes. does likes such act. this type of masturbation is looks like kind of satisfaction from resembling guhu to a super strong cockroach. hmm. this chem engineer guy i think with such  act, masturbated in public view. both showed he gets satisfaction from such acts. and both shwn he repeats such acts. so it really looks like masturbation. ok i have an expressionist hater. that likes to masturbate in public. this chemical engineer hater. ok i do think, with high eq side, when people repeat satisfaction acts whether its taking happiness from hurting others types or else, it looks like a kind of masturbation. and an impulsive mind also. my analysis on this chemistry eng is that he is an impulsive person thats not shamed of masturbating in front of public. this is full impulsive brain type. another impulsive brain type i observe. in life. from haters group. people impulsiv3e people, love to masturbate everywhere. in various topics. e.g. this guy takes satisfaction from this type of acts and repeats in public.


ok stupid acts of stupid eq people look like this to us. that are unfortunately born with a higher eq to this world. actually i wernt born high eq. i dont know how i developed but i found myself with high eq in sometime in life.

so when a person does a stupid act/an impulsive act, should be aware of the possible analysis of the high eq people side.  this act really looks like masturbation act. of impulsive type of brain. so not so strong frontal cortext? not a super intellgnt hater? hmm ok i am turning more Sherlock Holmes. i should stop right now.  but the thing is, what disgusts me most in life, is confronting acts of impulsive people. or masturbation acts like this.  some people have not so strong frontal cortext and force us to watch their public masturbation. this really looks like this. it looks like: ok look look i like hurting you. look i hurt you here also. look i hurt you. (constant repetition)  (takes satisfaction in multitude acts) (really looks like masturbation) this chem guy takes satisfaction from trying to hurt people. and i do infer likes masturbation also in personal life:D since does this masturbation topic in other areas like this. and has no shame of doing it publicly. ok, this really looks like an impulsive person. this chem eng. person. who try to hurt me like this. am i hurted? nope i actually laugh to this publicly open masturbation show.this chem engineer reveals he likes doing masturbation. cause he visibly takes pleasure of hurting people. and redoes it in our local news. newsletter wernt enough. ok.  a guy who likes doing masturbation(repeated satisfaction acts) is becoming a hater of me. ok.:D comedy show then? :D i now also have a chemical engineer hater. ok. ok i really have a weird life.

(this looks like this person takes satisfaction from hurting topic. and repeats it like an impulsive person. i want to learn psychology after confronting such things in life. to do analysis more. to be better Sherlock Holmes:P)


and also to fix my brain from ptsd since i have got a hamit named sociopath stalker, i need to learn psychology also due to that.



by the way, why the heck i have haters that are like this? people just do everything to try to make me fail including sociopath acts like hamit named sociopath stalker.

i just want to ask, why? does people behave this much maniac to also other people? why i am targeted with such maniac acts? 



ok i started wondering whether i became an eq genius. since such acts other people do looks quite stupid to me. or is it being old and wise? i dont know. but figure out my eq developed alot:D


it looks like what people does looks super stupid to my eyes. had i became an eq genius? or is it all people's usual mood. maybe its a common mood. maybe there are so not many much eq lacking people and they make feel as others like us eq geniuses? with such stupid acts. or we are really eq geniuses. this chem engineer made me felt like an eq genius:) people(telling to chem engineer) either stop behaving super stupid or we would continue feeling as eq geniuses.  i just cant stop feelign as i have a not super intellgnt hater.  i mean if were a hater, i wouldnt do this type of act thats this much impulsive nor stupid. that takes this reply. and with high eq, you dont be hater to people either. i mean hatred means nonrelevant feeling. nor creating a hatred act means nothing any time necessary. (except the time we need to show the hater to be lesser loud in doing masturbation or lesser be public in masturbation) i mean i dont get why people feel hatred. against others. i dont truly understand. ok i think i really became an eq genius like thing? but all my life, i had problem  in understanding hatred. except when i am stalked, i might used bad words to stop gettin stalked. but other than that, i never felt any hatred to anyone in life. its a feeling i just cant understand. to me feelings are happiness/love/emphaty(of some other people's feeligns)/pain. but i dont understand hatred acts nor hatred things and they look super stupid to me. either because this life turned me an eq genius at some point in time? before i were super stupid in eq. i dont know how i become better in eq. i really dont know.i were stupid like hell in eq level. maybe its because i got old? i dont know. but i see i get super nice level in eq. ok Freud would tell i would have felt hatred to myself if i dont feel hatred to others? ok i really ddnt liked how i look. maybe thats happens in mycase like that. maybe hatred is constant in people. in my case, it were inwards (e.g. i hated how i look all my life). but in other people, its outwards? but i just lack capability to understand outwards hatred everytime. except i became super mad by some acts once. in that i shown outwards hatred (e.g. using bad words) but in that case i were made really mad. but those times i wernt an eq genius? yepp. i were super stupid those times. (talking about 2 years ago or alike) so eq develops with getting older. in my case it developed slow not fast. but here in this point of life i am, with high eq :) quite happy to that:) ok i think i also felt hatred before(in trying to stop getting stalked and also in jealousy in another situation. 2 times i felt hatred thing yeppp). person,



and so seeing repeittive pleasure act (and its a pleasure act of hurting people, this guy takes pleasure of hurting people) really looks like masturbation. this chem engineer likes to masturbate? visibly.  (he used this time local news to insult me with resembling me to a super strong cockroach. ) (public masturbation show)

(ok it sucks feeling alone in a lake of all stupidness.no wrong comment. i know that most people are actually high eq. not so much peple hold low eq)





(ok i am not alone. and i have genius friends also:) yeppp i am not alone. (ok if is not friend its ok (i mean if i misunderstood and if i actually have no such friend:P)  i dont know if i have a gnius friend who has even spaceships:P i might had misunderstood as i have such friend:) hey its ok if you arnt friend and that i misunderstood:) but if you are friend, its super happy :) )

(ok with this eq level, i dont actually need friends to continue my life in normal mood. but it would be super happy to have friends also :) specifically a genius friend with even spaceships is super cool:P  though i dont know if i have such friend also:) I might had misunderstood that coincidence i might not have such friend. dont know. might had been just coincidence. if i have such genius friend, its super cool:)  as said, when i could buy my mini island in 1 month, always invited to parties him/his friends/family members if ever interested to, if likes to communicate with this guhu weirdo? i dont know if he likes to or not. if you are a friend really, i bet you never had a friend with this much haters before ? :P  )  (i ddnt get why i hd this much haters. i have a sociopath hater named hamit that does severe form of sociopahthy against me, a chemical engineer hater also.  dont know whom else hates me either. )

(hey its ok if you dnt wnt to be friend with some one who has maniac haters. and would be super happy to be friend with you:) its your choice. as told you(your friends/your family) are invited to parties after i fix my life conditions.   and maybe i misunderstood and you ddnt intntlly dd such coincidence? i dont know. just in case, you dnt like me since i have haters, its ok. and you are invited to future parties.& its just your choice, if you dont come its ok.  and if you come i would be super happy of course. but if you dnt like me its ok also. as told, in my iq/eq level i dont need friends strong friends or weak friends. i just need friends tolaugh/to behappy /to cheer up. i mean you dnt have to be friend since you pity to me since i have problems in life right now. only invited to parties if you really like to be friends. not because you pity to me since i have problems in life. is it ok? so only invited to parties of future, if you really like to be friends. and you dnt have to any attend if you dnt like me. is it ok? :) this topic is so confusing. i saw SH topic in your feed. i dont know why you mentioned. if its because you like me its super happy:) if its because you pity to me since i have hard life, then you dont have to pity to me. so i mean, please do such acts only because you like me, dont do such acts because you pity to me since i have hard life. look i am a strong fighter to hard life. you if you talk to me since you pity, you neednt pity:P hmm i would accept your attention only if you really like me and if i be sure that you dont pity to my life instead (that you pity that i have socio haters)? anyway. i like you. since you are a genius. and tomorrow i would get lost in my game coding universe for a month:) and after 1 mointgh i wish to construct a bttr life conditions. and you are invited to my future parties (you/your friends/your family). and only invited if you really want to attend. (not because you pity to my kind of hard life that i have socio haters that makes me become super strong).

hey i mgiht be 150 or 140 iqqued in highschool times cause my brain worked super fast by then. but were super stupid in other topics. dont know what it is now.its nt fast anymore:D i might be super stupied maybe now. but the thing is, i am not a person who needs other people ever nor any superficial attention (e.g. attention of pity feeling?). i just want people attention when they really want to show attnetion or when really want to be friends. not because they pity to me due to my severe life conditions of having socio haters.  so please only show attention if you really want to show attention, not because you pity to my life's problems:P

i think, i would get lost in coding game universe for a month. hey, come to parties of me i would set up 1month later if you like to be friends / if you like me(i would be super happy if you come:) i like you:)) and if you dont like me you wont come(its ok definitely, you dont have to come since you pity to me).

---------------------------------------

tomorrow getting lost in coding game universe yeppp:)





ok lets clarify why i said masturbating to the chemical engineer guy. cause he created a local news that is about super strong bugs in some city.  ok i saw in life in recent years that, like eating desire / like sex desire, some people also gets satisfaction from hurting others. it tried to make fun of that form of psychopathy with masturbating analogy. since the guy takes satisfaction from trying to hurt act, that quite resembles masturbation. but thsi guy makes public masturbation with trying to hurt others. so wanted to clarify why i told he is masturbating in public to the chemical engineer guy. he did masturbated via sending me a mail on that. then he continued masturbating with creating a local news saying super strong bugs last day. this guy has impulsive brain type  and likes to masturbate frequently.
I before had no idea hadnt seen people who likes to hurt others in this psychopathy form. this chemcial engineer likes to masturbate in different form. and also likes to show case masturbation with public news. hmm likes doing super expressionist masturbation act. likes big show casing of masturbation. ok this impulse of tryign to hurt people and its realization in such public act, shows me that simply this guy likes to masturbate alot. has an impulsive brain. and also takes satisfaction from pain of others so frequently tries to hurt others. i just cant stop thinking that this guy also masturbates alot in sex life since he repeats that behavior in other areas that he gets satisfaction from. so a masturbation liker hater i do have. ok i become advanced in eq only because maybe i have mentally ill haters/stalkers and while i try to analyze them i became a master of eq/psychology? hey guhu's sociopath stalkers/haters, you made guhu an eq genius with yours sociopathic/psychopathic acts.

ok i figure out some people have high libido in life. but not to sex maybe just they get satisfaction from hurting others and have high libido in that. i do think these people have impulsive brain types.
its like i figure out, some people really have high libido in such way. that they get satisfaction from trying to hurt people. and they like to repeat that act. like masturbation in sex analogy. I dont use just sex in sex analogy. cause these ill people do  a self act. i mean they do it themselves (with ideas of hurting the victim they do psychopathic act of trying to hurt and whilst executing them) . i mean this act of high libido against hurting others/people, its not that a collobrative act i mean the high libido holder masturbates and the victim who sees that confirms its a masturbation and looks asks why people does such stupid acts. it looks like a masturbation act from outside. as a victim of this act, i do think its definitely seeing a person that publicly masturbates. its an unstoppable high severe form of high libido (but not for sex but fior hurting trying to hurt people) that executes itself. and resembles masturbation alot.

i just cant stop thinking this guy also masturbates in sex life. cause why not:D cause whilst doing this act to hurting people satisfaction type(hmm yeah this psychopath gets satisfaction from such acts visibly as seen) i just do think does this type of act also in sex life most possibly:D cause from outside this chem engineer looks like a quite impulsive brain holding person.


ok whilst i have got a sociopath hamit named stalker whom stalks me with sociopathy mental illness acts, i now have another maniac that targets me (a chemical engineer)  that tries to do try of hurting act with a high libido to that.


no wonder i turned out an eq genius after confronting mentally ill people's targeting/stalk/following. 

----------------------------------------------

yeah my genius friend  might have erased me seeing i have got sociopaths hating me. i dont know if erased me or not since because i have got sociopath haters doing sociopathic acts against me. as told, invited to parties him/his friends if ever interested to. and its of course ok if he doesnt like to come since i am a personw ith haters. i know people usually dont like people with haters. people usually like popular people.

i dont know how, just the way i am, i collect haters. i dont know how. i dont know why. it wernt like that before. but its like that recent years. i have got even  a sociopath hater&stalker (hamit named) whom gives aliases to me and tries to  stalk with also sociopathy/impersonation of people/impersonation of me/aliases/fantasy worlds.
i have got sociopath haters and i dont know why. i wonder just why it happens to me. why me? why do i have mentally ill haters/stalker(hamit)?


its like when i am saying i am super strong against sociopath hamit's stalk, the chemical engineer guy creates a local news about super strong cockroaches. trying to make me resemble to non super strong thing. so its a fight of power? or fight of egos? or what? to me i resembled that to,  to analogies of psychopathy, where pscyhopath get satisfaction from trying to hurt others and executes such act in high libido and even in public news, so masturbates in public using local news.

so last years, i confronted the ugly truths of humanity. like these type of people. that has libido for hurting people. and also sociopathy. aka, the hamit named stalker whom does sociopathic acts.






------------------------

ok i think i might lost the genius person (in eq/iq.) with space ship  since he sees people tries to mess with me with sociopathy. i would understand if he erases me whilst he wants to be friend, cause i really have sociopathic haters like that.  I wish he sees my life is under attack by unrelated people for whom try to impersonate people/whom try to take topics unrelated and use it for hatred crime like trying to show innocent acts as hatred crime(as i saw this is done to friend). i am under attack. so this attack might also impact my friends. so i want it to let it be known that the attack i confront is not any related to friends. not any related to genius friend either. dont know if he is a friend or not. but i scared he gots also impacted by this sociopathic haters. cause whilst i become victim, my friends also gets impacted. these people impersonate people and take topics of innocent words and try to show it as a hatred crime(done to a friend of mine).  so i wish we dont be friends with genius person with space ships whilst my life is udner attack by such acts cause he might be also tried to be attacked with taking innocent words and try to show it as hatred crime. not only i am attacked, my friends might be also get impacted from attack. cause they impersonate they do all forms of attack. so being friend to me is risky right now.
so genius person who is not any related to this attack i confront, i just think if he likes me, please lets not be friends whilst i am targeted by psycho people's attacks. cause they try to show innocent sentences as hatred crime with weird acts.  i scared my genius friend would also be impacted by such acts. so its better we dont be friends whilst during such period. and its ok if he erases me. cause me beign under attack also these people whom try to attakc me also tries to attack my friends. so its better we dont communicate/be friends whilst i am under such attack.

there is real shit happening. i do get that people try to take people's innocent words and tries to make it show as hatred crime in different ways with indirect ways. hmm so i scared my friends might be also impacted by such acts. cause my friends got even impersonated by these sociopath hamit whom stalks me. so, i do think its risky to be friends with me right now adays.

so to genius friend with spaceships, better we dont be friends whilst people attakc me like this cause they might also try to attakc you, they do sociopathic acts to turn innocence to hatred crime looking like things as i saw tried to being applied to a friend of mine. so my friends also get attakced with sociopathy. i mean there is a real shit going under i sense from these attacks i confront. i mean you might be also impacted by this sociopath people's targeting. i have sociopath enemies, and if you become friend to me, you get targeted by them also. so better be not friends right now.  one day, when i could buy a mini island, so that sociopath haters of me cant reach out me, you are invited to be friends. but right now being friend to me is risky. cause i sensed that these people also try to attack you with attacking me with impersonation or taking unrelated topics to show amplify some innocent act as a bad thing(as i saw this happens to a friend, i mean people try to do sociopathy acts against also my friends as i see) . i mean i sensed such thing is going on. so please dont be friend ever with me whilst i have such haters that also target my friends. one day when i could buy a mini island myself(i could do that), you are definitely invited to parties as i invited for if you like to be friends. but right now its best we dont ever communicate. cause people attack me to try to attack you also? i dont know what the shit is going on. but i sensed such thing. so better not communicate these hard times. and i trulyt respect you erase my friendship since it creates such problems since i have got sociopath haters/stalkers.  but as told, one day, if i could solce this problem, that i buy a mini island and get isolated from sociopath stalker/hater's reach of sociopathic acts, you are definitely invited to parties if you like to be friend. cause that time my friendship wont be risky. but i felt that, you and me be friends now is risky thing cause my haters also attack my friends in sociopathic ways as i observe. so please erase me for a while cause i really  have sociopathic haters who also tries to do sociopathic acts against my friends as i observe.


you genius friend, please continue building spaceships and dont be friend to me to confront sociopathic acts from my sociopathic stupid haters. you dont have time to confront sociopathy. your time is valuable and please dont be friend with me whilst i have sociopathic haters cause i scared they also do sociopathic acts agaisnt you. please dont spend time on stupid topic like this.  please. and if you like to be friend to me, please be friend to me when i solve this sociopathic haters issue, e.g. in future if i could buy a mini island with coding my game, i would be super happy if you be friend to me. if you are interested. if you erased its also ok.  ok i just wish all the best. and lets not be friends whilst i have sociopathic haters.  cause i scared they also try to target you. sociopathy is super stupid. please dont spend time on confronting super stupid things. i do confront stupid things, i dont want you tyo also deal/confront with stupid things. i have sociopathic hater stalkers who does  stupid sociopathy and i dont want you to confront that also with only because you be a friend to me. please dont spend time to deal with stupidity. yours time is valuable. you should spend all time to yours important multi projects. I would be super happy to be friend to you whenever i solve the sociopathic haters issue but not now. cause being a friend to me is risky right now since i have swociopathic haters. as told, i would solve the sociopathic haters issue in 1 month and after 1 month, if you like me/liket o be friends, you are definitely invited to parties and i would be super happy/super honored to be friend of you. but right now its risky to be friend of me since i have got sociopath haters and those haters might target also my friends. and its also ok if you erased me since i have got so much problems and i know people dont like to be friends iwth people with bivg problems like sociopathic haters. just please dont spend time on this stupid topic. if you like to be friends, lets be friends after i solve this stupid topic of sociopathic haters issue (i would solve that with coiding a game and buying a mini island so that sociopathic haters cant disturb me nor my friends with socioapthic acts). so i beg you dont ever spedn any seconds to this stupidity. and you are only invited to be friends after i solve this topics of sociopath haters topic. (and its ok if you erased me, ok cause i know people dont like nonpopular people alot, its ok if you dont like to be friends )

its like i felt some people try to disturb me very bad for last 3 years. and i see now when someone shows friendship, they also try to attack him in indirect ways(Trying to show him as a bad person whilst he is not) only because he shows friendship to me.  so my friends also get targeted by socipath haters of mine. so for a while , i wish to have none friends whilst i solve this problem. so i wish my good genius friend whom builds space ships whom builds cool projects spends no time to this stupidity. cause he also gets impacted by sociopathy of my stupid sociopath haters while he shows friendship to me.  so i wish we dont be friends whilst i have sociopath haters that also targets my friends. and i think its ok if my genius friend decides to erase me, cause i know people dont like unpopular people with sociopathic haters, i know people only like to be friends to popular people, so its ok if he erases me. and if he doesnt erases me, as told, he is invited to parties in future after i solve this sociopath haters problem with coding my game and buying a mini island in future.















---------------------------

ok todays impersonation act i seen 10 or15 minutes ago:  a woman were shoutedly talking in outside and named my name multiple times as if trying to show if talking to me or i dont know.  people dont believe get deceived by these people of impersonators.  I dont know why i confront such type of sociopathy. i have got a sociopath stalker named hamit i get these acts being articulated.  i also heard some name i heard in stalk incidents alot. and woman many times named my name i catched up late. i just ddnt want to listen and i wre stinking so i washed my hair instead. but just also wanted to note that people dont get deceived by these impersonators. the woman named a name that i also heard in stalk incidents alot (with very disturbing psycho sentences, that name i heard in stalk incidents where super disturbign psycho sentences were said). so this woman belongs to stalker sociopaths group and might she tried to show off as if she is talking to me i dont know, she repeated my names many times so it little bit looked like as if she is talking to me?. i dont know if she tried to do such act. i ddnt listen. anyway. this is todays impersonation act i seen.  so people dont get deceived by these impersonator sociopath stalkers. I do confront constant impersonation/constant fantasy world creation with high vicinity following beside constantly. i do have a sociopath hamit named stalker.  and this is the notes about today's incident i catched up. this guy name i heard(which is syl), would come to cafes and woman around him would say very disturbing sociopathic sentences while i dont even know whom this psycho syl is nor why this psycho creates such psycho sentence. so these peole all articulated  by sociopath hamit stalker. ok this is the recent events about impersonation/sociopathy. yepp. i feel happy that internet exists so these people cant do succeed in impersonation/socioapathy acts.  Its like i confront constant lie creation and constant sociopathy for 3 years. it feels like i fight against a moriarty. but happy that internet exists so that they cant deceive people with like 15 minutes ago incident with naming my name shouting my name in sentences this time i ddnt listen though. i report everytime i catch an impersonation incident/sociopathy incident. super happy that internet exists so that i could fight against impersonation act(sociopathy act) much better. the woman really were trying to show as if she is talking to me and were shoutedly talking.ok this is really like a horror movie. but luckily internet exists that i could fight against the horror movie impersonator sociopaths.  I have got a sociopath hamit named stalker and this is the current impersonation/sociopathy report incident of today. every day nearly i got stalked last 3 years by this sociopath and his perpetuators. like this way. in this form of sociopathy of impersonation/aliases/fantasies created.

----------------------------------



ok lets code the game and buy a mini island. so that sociopath hamit cant stalk me. or i might buy a house with very huge garden in Alaska. ok lets code the game asap. i stuck at some algo part so but would work on that now.
lets work:) (and as told, if wanna be friends exists that want to be friends, invited to future parties:)) (dont know if there are any wanna be friends either. they might hadnt existed alredly(e.g. i might had msndrstod coincidnce of SH) or erased me since i have got big problems (like having a hamit named sociopath stalker that does these acts i tell), and if they erased me its ok also since i am a problematic person(not that problems any root from me nor any from my wanna be friends).  and so in summary: all wanna be friends are invited to future parties:))))). yepp :)



------------------------------------
lets solve the life's problems. lets study lets work hard to code the game. and as told create parties alot:) yepp:) and build other projects also later on. but i think after i save my life from hamit's stalk, i would do create lots of parties in mini island i would buy or the home i would buy with very large garden.




hmm  something i read about wavelength to rbg gamut conversion things. since my things are about wavelengths/flux and direction. were stuck in some point in algorithm of sky. i dpont know if i would add raman scattering?  lets see. ok lets solve the problem in algorithm, there is a part i got stucked in algo.lets fix.   yeppp coding /design time to game:)

i found a super masculine music. and i liked it. i normally dnt like that type of music but this time liked. its a game music i infer and it has a nice orchestrate. 


oki would draw the drawing of the cover of the music i listen. in black and white. hadnt draw for a while and i liked the state of wanting to draw.  its kind of tattoo like drawing:) and i liked it:)
this is it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zP_lAuTRRCI

i usually dont like these type of music or drawings. but liked now since it looks like a tattoo drawing :) i figure out my game could have models like this? no. cause it would have  models like some game's characters i seen and liked. it would be differnt models. but this one i wanted to draw since it looks like a tattoo drawing. but the idea of drawing models of my game myself i liked. i might have models that looks like this character in this video. drawng them would be fun.

i dont know why i wanted to start drawing trials again. maybe its because of game topic. ok I usually liked other forms of drawing not pictures like this.  i usually liked to draw other things like hands/people or else. its first time i am interested to draw war figures. anyway whatever i draw, its happy to get back drawing trials back. i get back wanna draw attitude. i lost interst to drawing foir a long while. ok i want to also reinit sculpturing thingy. i want to create sculpture of this figure i seen:)(above link) yeppp lets buy clay tomorrow yayyy:) i am super happy right now for since i have again mood to try drawing sculpturing trials again:)  I am back to arts trials :) yayyyy:)  though i never had wanted to draw such thing before:D i usually liked to draw very differnt things. not a picture like this.

so today's agenda: drawing fun. and then solvign the problem in sky algo that i am stuck. 



first drawing trial failed:P hadnt given the figure well and is incomplete.(not shaded) and couldnt correctly draw. ok i have lots to learn in drawing. but it were happy to reinit drawing trial. i figure out my new context would be game soundtracks pictures.

i dont know how to draw the head features and i left drawing without trying. since it needed to do shading and i dont know shading alot. but i would might continue other day.  i left the drawing incomplete. and the upper body part has been smaller than the original picture. and also left leg isnt proportional to right leg. and i left in middle. but were fun to try to draw again:) i want to create lots of drawing trials. and wish i learn shading one day. i ddnt want to get in detail of shading and did laziness. i could copied the shading i see but itg needed lot detail. in summary, for shading i did also laziness. and also upper body part hasnt been like in picture. or head. i dont know how to draw skulls either. would try that tattoo style drawings to learn to. it hadnt any resembled original picture. ok i need to retry drawing this from 0 not trying to fix this one. or by working on it. but the drawing needs lots of details and i feel lazy to add them. ok  anyway everyday would try to try drawing other things to reinit to come back to previous capability set in drawing. felt like i were tiny little bit better in drawing. and the torso of this figure ddnt any resembled original picture. so i just couldnt make the figure resemble the original picture. i worked on 10 minutes or 14 minutes and left. but need to make the torso bigger to little bit resemble the original picture. and the head details are all missing. anyway.

ok eyes nose all have to worked on but i ddnt spent time to. i did laziness and left. so i am also lazy in drawing. so head doesnt any resemble also. so this is not any resembling the original drawing. the sword i just drw its outline but ddnt drew i left in middle this drawing. head and torso need to be corrected. but i figure out i liked to draw warriors :) would draw warriors awhile. or try to draw. but this warrior needs to be redrawn witha bigger torso and proportional legs (left leg and right leg dont match up:D) and also sword and also head/eyes/mouth/bones of head. all needs to be worked on. i just delinated the figure but needs lots of work. and correction also. but i am ont used to drawing high detailed things. i wish in future i could learn drawing better.
 

ok instead of critizing my work, iw ould work on it to correct it:) today or tomorrow i dnt know. cause i want to draw a detailed nice version of this warrior type. and want to draw warriors of my game also. whilst learning drawing warriors.

ok drawing with charcoal pencil is kind of harder and real image really looks much better:D i am ashamed of my bad quality of my drawing:) on drawing paper it really looks much better:P





someone called me at 5:43am. its a local number and its unknown. noone  calls me at 5:43 am so i wondered whom is. (i that time hadnt opent since is unknown number. but i also wondered whom calls me) so i called now to learn but hadnt opent.





reason i said bad things to chem engineer is the thing he resembled me and i still feel very bitter to this topic. i hadnt told  any bad things to his other paragraphs.  I actually hadnt even read the other paragraphs since getting super upset to the first paragraph but only read little 1 or 2 sentences after first paragraph. all my reaction were to the thing he resembled me. i got super upset/angry. and i did tried to reply to such accusation in a similar tone. or worse tone. but it wernt any related to any other paragraphs . it were to first paragraph and an analogy, resembling me to something and so i did analgoies of hurt act satisfaction to sometopic as a reply.  cause that insult isnt any acceptible. so i replied to the insult like that cuase that insult really made me super upset/angry.(being resmbled to tht cretre type.)


 sociopath hamit named stalker (might have also name of rahmi, cause in stalk incidents with curses i heard this rahmi name also, cause here in street some one 2 r 3 weeks ago shouted: "dont disturb guher. rahmi has fired you". so this rahmi named person allocates people to disturb me.   and today froma woman outside shouted a curse with big hatred voice and also rahmi name also in such sentence. so this hamit named sociopath stalker might have also rahmi name.  ) so the sociopath has also rahmi name as i get. hires people to disturb/do sociopathy acts against me. i have got a moriary of named hamit rahmi then? definitely has rahmi name also since i heard rahmi name also in stalk incidents like this and previously 3 years ago also.whilst confronting sociopathy of a hamit rahmi named sociopath, no wonder i started art trials with warrior figures. i have got a moriarty sociopath stalker named hamit rahmi. ) i wanted to draw battle things listen battle music last day and also watched movies later.  tomorrow would be game coding time. i now remembereed a stalk incident 2 years ago. a rahmi named short heighted guy would shout me ork. so the sociopath has two names of hamit and rahmi as i get.so this short guy is the sociopath. i remember 2 years ago, maybe 3 times ork shouting and a guy telling rahmi to the other guy whom shouted ork.i newly remembered that 2 years ago stalk incident. i also remember the following incident: i once went to ankara. and in bus station, in a cafe i ate things, a group of people in one left desk shouted rahmi and some sociopathic sentences. so this rahmi named sociopath guy even followed me whilst i were traveling from istanbul to ankara as because noone other than my family knew i were going to ankara and stalked me in bus stations' cafe place. so must did stalking to there. a real sociopath/moriarty psychopath. and i do confront constant sociopatyh/impersonation/constant following like this from this hamit rahmi named sociopath.so i get that the stalker also has name of rahmi. so stalker has name hamit rahmi. and is a moriarty like sociopath. i try to remember the image of this stalker as i seen him shiouting me ork. i remember he is a very short guy and thin and also slgihtly bald. but i dont remember the exact look. as told, i had a chance to see this rahmi named person in shopping center whilst he shouted me ork and his friend talked rahmi to him. so thats how i learn the name of. but i dont remember how he in detail looks like. i dont remember his face. i do remember he is very short/very thin/ugly looking/slight bald. so i do understand from all these stalk incidents the root stalker has also rahmi name. so moriarty has hamit rahmi name? but no, hamit name i saw is a different guy as i remember from another stalk incident where hamit named stalked me in a cafe. so the root stalker is either hamit or rahmi named. i from today's stalk incident(a woman with a very hating voice shouted curse and used rahmi name), and as i remembered the stalk sentence said 3 weeks ago, i get that the root stalker has rahmi name. i wish i remembered this guy;s facial features but i dont any. cause i seen in shopping center where this guy shouted me ork. 2 years ago. i just remember that ork shouting guy were very thin/very short/ugly looking.and i learnt he has rahmi name cause after he shouted ork, his friend said rahmi to me. they passed 1 meter beside me, and shouted ork. and his friend said rahmi to him. i wish i remember this stalker's facial features. i dont. this incident i tell is from 2 years ago. so the hamit might be articulated by this rahmi named person. from today's curse shouting with very hating voice (like ork shoutings) and having rahmi name in that sentence again, i understand that moriarty has rahmi name.3 years of confronting sociopath/ork word/impersonalization/impostorings. i understand that is done by this rahmi named moriarty alike sociopath stalker.


anyway, lets code the game and save my life from this sociopath stalker rahmi's stalk. and buy either a mini island or an Alaska home with huge garden then create parties and invite wanna be friends if ever they get interested.


ok  i should sleep now. i hadnt slept all night. need to sleep at least 6 hours. then need to study game and if game succeeds, definitely would buy a mini island or huge garden home in Alaska. and create parties and invite all wanna be friends.

and or get lost in reading learning things in my peaceful place. thats my plan for future. getting lost in learning maths/more computer science topics/some physics topics. yepp thats the agenda for future. and also parties and inviting all wanna be friends. Alaska homes looks nice and or buying a mini island also.



after i have a succesful game:

*i want to spend lots time in reading/learning in a place not accesible to rahmi named stalker's stalk. and also have events like parties and invite wanna be friends if they ever interested to attend.
*my life's plan is finding a peaceful corner in life(that rahmi named stalker cant reach) and reading/learnign/building things and sometimes parties. and inviting wanna be friends if ever interested.




ok  i wonder whom called me at 5:43 am. :) but couldnt learn.ok i learnt its wrong call:D ok i were expecting that its wrong call:D because beign called at that hour is not something i am used to:DD and i get quite curious to learn and learnt now. since the caller called to say it were wrongly call. 


ok i figure out i would draw figures to my game. cause it is super fun. to try to draw warriors. but i figure out i draw worse with charcoal pencil.




today i going to start the day differently. some sports. though i feel no energy to that. but looked fun to do. but also lacking energy. anyway. lets do that sports yepp. it would be differnt. ok its swimming. but i got fat and i dont like going to seaside when i am fat. anyway i can be fat. lets go to seaside. otherthan that i dontr hva energy. feel as lacking energy to do sports today.


by the way the picture i drew looks super bad as photo dnt know why. i have a6 size drawing papers and picture i drew is bigger. everytime i look to picture i say wov this is really bad quality drawing. ok would redraw characters to game later on. and its not this character sytle. I am not creating a diablo game:) its more like another game's characters.but torso shapes could be similar why not. let take that as an exercise to creativity in drawing. but it really looked so bad when i take photo. real drawing really looks much better. anyway. lets get better in drawing since its fun.


ok i today lack energy to do things. but mom wants me to go to seaside. so lets go. since mom is unhappy since i dotyn go outside home. ok lets find a shore thats not populated.

i dont have energy to go to seaside. but as mom's request i folow causde i dont go outside home and this makes mom upset. lets go to seaside for 1 hour. yepp. i dont have energy either:) but lets make mom happy.


 ok lets go to seaside then:)


ok i am happy i can draw and would like to draw these days:) not warrior today. but my game needs warriors. so might need to do so. art trial is sometimes most fun  activity:) art trials is my life:) . if souls existed, my soul's most part would be liking art:)I would create warriors of my game in art trials yepp.even if i dont want to draw warriors. but  the thing about art is i also when i do soem activity like to stop it as i draw. procrastination thing.

lets buy a moleskin and draw at seaside? nope. i like to draw at home.  ok lets go to seaside asap otherwise sun would go down. lets buy little things to myself from shoppign centers.



ok in seaside it passed nice. i like to sleep on sea, not sleeping but closing my eyes and like lying in sea and it feels like i dont know but its super relaxing. i did that alot today:) since i were tired i slept and whilst only my ugly nose gets outside i mean and also feeling my hair wandering in the sea, it just feels super relaxing, i like that alot. that i could even sleep like that until a wave comes and enters my nostrils. its like sun bathing on sea. i open my arms and lie and just my ugly nose is outside. its super relaxing:) when there is not much wave, i do think its much more better than sunbathing on shore and its super relaxing. i am super happy that i listened mom and went to swimming. though i ddnt swam. i also like diving but little tiny 2 or 3 sewconds. i like to look to the sea's upper boundary from bottom of sea. i dont use sea glasses so my eyes got reddish today. cause i also dived alot today. again its just 1 or 2 or 3 seconds:D cant be called diving:D but i liked watching the sea's upper boundary, its color and also deep down the soil/sand. i dont know if i should buy sea glasses. cause i like to open my eyes inside sea and then today it all got red afterwards. so it were super relaxing day:)

i first went to a shore and there were more waves there. a couple passed and said a sentence which has a possibility of sentence of sociopath stalkers. so i left the shore and went to another. there it were after 6pm and the colors of sea were nice. then there again i left scaring its the narrative sociopath says one guy shouted a sentence and i scared if they are sociopath stalker(rahmi)'s articulated people. so i left instantly there. so i figure out even if i scare from sociopath stalker(rahmi)'s stalk, i can go to sea, cause there are infinite shores here, in one if i scare i am stalked with sociopathy sentences i go to another shore. yayyy. so i can go to seaside. yeppp.

it all passed great. i slept on water. felt 1 with nature kind of feeling it has and  when i open my eyes i see the sky. ) my hair wandering inside the water it feels amazing. this is guhu the manatee's memories of seaside of today:)

ok right here, 20 minutes ago, a guy shouted a sentence  "guher is ada". ok one other alias that i am impersonated is ada than?. i have a sociopath stalker and does this much effort in giving aliases to the victim he stalks. its like a horror movie i think this sociopath stalker rahmi's stalk. but i am just too relaxed to stress that right now:)  i ddnt stressed. one more alias. i remember the ada name also in stalk incidents 3 years ago(when i were stalked in coffees). i thought its a stalker's friend that is helping the stalkers stalk. turns out its the nth alias stalker sociopath tries to assign to me. i have got a stalker sociopath thats like from horror movies, constantly tries to impersonate me and other people. and does this act consistently for 3 years. that constant stalk and giving aliases behavior and ork shoutings and curses also sometimes.  so i do think sociopathy is really dangerous illness to society.  hires people to do these acts cause i myself heard that. 3 weeks ago. some guy shouted "dont disturb guher. rahmi has fired you". so this rahmi (whom likes to shout me ork) hires peop;le to stalk/distuyrb me. ok even this is like horror movies, i dont stress now cause i am too relaxed since sea were amazing. and i found an algorithm to be able to go to seaside. whenever sociopath stalker's articulated people come(if some people say sentences that resembles sociopathic sentences), i would go to another shore. there are infinite shores here:) so i can go to swimming. i thought i would also scare of going to swimming(and i did scared also). but yeah now i figure out with thsi way i can.since there are infinite shores. so when the stalker is a sociopath, could do super disturbing acts like impersonation of many names to the victim he stalks. and its super disturbing/super scary. this psycho has shouted me ork and i see thats not enough also impersonates me and gives me aliases. i have got a sociopath stalker whom is hell bent to try to disturb/try to destroy my life. gives me even aliases for that. constantly stalks me. even when i go on a bus, stalks me in the bus station that the bus goes to. stalks me in high vicinity and these type of acts like creating characters to me. this is super evil version of sociopathy i guess ?  i have got a super evil sociopath named rahmi. and evern hires people in doing these sociopathy acts. as i heard beacuse. 3 weeks ago. soime guy in phone told a sentence very loudly (i guess wanted me to hear? to try to learn the stalker?) sayiung "stop disturbing guher. rahmi has fired you". so, rahmi hires a guy to disturb me. so this is the story of a victim whoi is stalked by a sociopath named rahmi. anyway. is not this like an Alfred Hitchkok movie's scenario? these acts that sociopath rahmi does against guhu the victim. i dont want to victimize anything but this is really like an Alfred Hitckok movie. not any less. i have got a sociopath stalker named rahmi thats right outside from an Alfred Hitckok movie.


 


lieing on water feels as being 1 with nature(Freud's being 1 topic(i mean about being in mom's womb again type of thing) ). and it feels super relaxing.


yeppp ok enough resting time. now studying time:)  thinking whether i sohuld go to sea tomorrow again or not. i figure out its better in after 5 oclock. cause sun doesnt burn that much, and air colors are so nice. and lying in sea as told feels super relaxing, so might go again i think i would go again. ok enough resting time, now studying time. the algorithm part that i am stuck in, would work on that. yepp this night i watched 5 or 6 movies of a tv show's season. like i did yesterday. i like to not watch till season is ended and then watch any time later on. i still hadnt watched lots of tv shows that were popular like lost. anyway,  yeppp studying time. lets fix the algo. lets complete the algo.and lets continue coding the game thing afterwards.


ok today passed outside with family. i as told wanted to go to seaside, and mom and dad had to go to aunts home at seaside (to look to grandmom) and so i left mom and dad to there and went to swimming then went back to aunts home. but the aunt came very late. (her and her relatives car had broken) so,  i stayed/passed time with mom/dad/grandmom there at aunts home. i newly came to home with mom&dad.  so a day passed all with parents & swimming.



there is a guy outside loudly talking. might be from scoioatph stalker's articulated people set.   i dnt listen but some name is a name i heard thats very unique and thats i heard in stalk incidents that i heard. i dont listen nor care. i have got a sociopath stalker named rahmi. and this rituels of confronting continous stalk/sociopathic sentences, i get used to, i mean my stress level dont rise now when confronting sociopathy. if something repeatedly happens, like sociopath coming around house, saying sociopath sentences/doing socipathy included stalk, if it happens 5 or 6 times, in first 5 time i stressed alot. but after confronting this behavior of sociopath (a rahmi named scoio) for many days (stalk around house with sociopathic sentences) my stress level in my blood doesnt rise. before, i lived in 35th floor so there were not many chance of stalkign from outside. the sociopath rahmi from alfred hitckok movies continues to stalk me here in this city. but i ams uper happy i could control stress/scare level finally.  i mean my stress level ddnt changed this time. getting stalked with sociopathic sentences of this alfred hitckok movies psycho like psycho sociopath rahmi and his articulated people, i get used to confrointing the stalk/scoiopathic sentences. and i am happy my stress level in my blood dont rise now when confronting sociopathy.


weird cncidence. i watched all stranger's new season last night. wre nice:) liked it. then my mom last day saw nightmare where there were tied 4 very big snakes and she said to us, something a very unnice thing like a very big tongue came out from their mouths. there were mtuated like snakes she said and all were tied. (mom had nightmare). but the movie i watched hadf such creature. as mom told her nightmare, i said in the movie i watched there were such two mouthed creatures (as the creature in stranger's last season had some second thing coming from their mouth).  mom hadnt seen stranger things but she had the nightmare as if she watched the movie i watched. i got used to watching movies from my phone:) i like it alot. i watch all netflix  movies from my phone. this really looks like the incident of: i saw my brothers nose bled and in morning i learnt nephew's nose bled. and this time, i watched the creatures in stranger things and mom saw a dream alike such creature of tied snakes with second mouths. but it were snakes. not stranger movie's differnt creature.sometimes i just want to ask is this a simulation, specifically in such moments:)

funniest oen were, i talked about conjuring movie. next day a bird fell inside to our house from where we dont know and fell to my mom's head. and then that same night a carpet fell to the ground:) ok correlation and not causation of course. but sometimes tiny times, i just ask whether is it a simulation or not. i am atheist. i do think this base reality the uppermost base reality. i mean i dont think ints a simulation but its like very tiny such moments i ask whether its a simulation or not:).


what mom's nightmare were about. they(mom&dad) come to house. in her dream, onder brother is resting. and they saw the very thick veyr big but tied 4 or 5 snakes.. and but they dont scare saying they are not dangerous and they are near to death. then one of them creates snake voice and in its mout another thing comes out and (and from her depiction i get something like i saw in stranger things came from its mouth) then the snakes route to kitchen then mom says oh my son is in kitchen. thn she woke up. i am happy i dont see dreams i either dont remember or dont see dreams i dont know which one. when i were a child, i saw alot. when i were ypung i saw alot. but last 7 or 10 years i dont see dreams i dont kjnow why. maybe i see and i dont remember. i see & remember at most once 2 or 3 months. or maybe once 5 or 6 months. either i see dreams and dont remember or i really dont see.

the thing of me watching creatures of two mouths in stranger things and in same night mom seeing nightmare of a creature with 2 mouths were silly & strange.
i normally dont take these things as weird. but after leila's incident i just also take it as tiny little bit possibility of weirdness. such incidents. when i take it as tiny /little bit weird, i do think ask whether is this simulation like thing that we are in all?  (what is leila's incident, its like in that incident, i did a sculpture and her hair resembled (not intentionally but just whilst tryign hair forms) princess leia's hair and the next day i heard princess leila passed away the next day:S so i asked whether i felt or am i a medium type of queries by then tiny little bit times.


hey if ths were a simulation, hey simulation creator why do you torture me with giving me a psycho stalker that stalks me nearly every day for last 3 years? and does sociopathy acts as i tell, constant impersonation/impostoring/socioapthy at seevere degree/fantasies creation?

anyway happy that i dont stress now. stress/scare level ddnt rised this time:) (as stalker's articulated guy talked sociopathic sentences outside again from park infront of our house) (the alfred hitckok movies like psycho stalker rahmi does these acts constantly for 3 years) (hey if this is a simulation, hey simulation creator whats your problem with me for letting such sociopath stalker stalking me ? )

(anyway i am happy i feel like i am over trauma. i dont stress when the stalker sociopath rahmi articulates people to do talk sociopathy around my home now) this time, my stress level in my blood ddnt rised:) yappp:) super happy:) i could talk truly as i am over trauma of the stalk type of an artiucaltd guy(via a rahmi named sociopath stalker, cause i heard, a guy talking in phone 3 weeks ago, told sentences of (to the other person on phone) said loudly: "dont disturb guher. rahmi has fired you". so this sociopath hires people to disturb me. a sociopath pscyho from alfred hitckok movies.  ) coming to park and stalking with sociopathy now.


ok but lets do no dramas. cause now i feel even when articulated guy comes to park to talk sociopathy and hearing it from our house,   I dont scare nor stress. so no more dramas on this. cause i figure out my stress level in my blood doesnt rise. last 2 days. i figure out stress/scare feeling passed. super happy to that. so no more talking dramas about being inside a horror movie (i have a sociopath stalker named rahmi). cause i dont feel as i am inside a horror movie now. cause my stress/scare level doesnt rise when i get stalked by this psycho rahmi and his articulated helpers to stalk & their sociopathic sentences. constant ork shoutings this started with. and it goes with further very unnice insults. it is like ork wernt enough and these people do further stalk/disturbing types. as told, no need to restate, i have got a psycho stalker from alfred hitckok movies(rahmi named). but i promise i would nomore dramatize it. since i feel as stress rise problem passed. thuis situation doesnt threaten my amygdala any more. i mean its lesser traumatic. i ddnt stressed when i get stalked this  time. ok so no more dramatizing this. i actually dont dramatize tell it as it is. and its really like a horror movie. but what i mean is, at least my stress reaction to this scoiopathy/stalk has passed. rahmi named sociopath stalker no more rise stress level in my blood when does sociopathy acts against me. ok, last night as i reported the stalk incident, i dont fully know if the stalker were in park in front of our house. a guy's loud voice came loudly talking and it might be from other side of the house but not the park. he used some words/names thats very unique to words thats said in stalk incidents. and i ddnt listen. i just listened for a while. he mentioned of shooting (most possibly me) so its super important to not get outside of house unnecessarily i think. i have got a rahmi named psycho stalker that stalks me like this for 3 years with constant effort of ork shoutings/degracing effort/all these sociopath/sociopathic sentences i confront. so no wonder if my life is also under threat. i mean this sociopath rahmi stalker is hell bent on trying to destroy my life. no wonder if he also targets my physical life.  ok so continueing my algorithm of staying too mch time at home. yepp. and lets code the game. one word constantly shouted were "fukara"(it means super poor. these psychopaths shouts me somethign like that whilst i am an engineer). I just cant stop thinking that, this rahmi named psycho stalker fell in love to me?. and i never looked to him and he tries to destroy my life due to this and because he is a sociopath stalker tries to destroy my life with sociopathy. anway, lets build up my startup. and then buy a mini island or a cute home in Alaska with a super huge garden. and also as told, i would create parties and all wanna be friends are invited yepp:).


so the stories part of my life that are really happens but weird. like talking of Conjuring movie and a bird enter our house from 1 or 1.5 cm opening in tent over in metal doors and hitting my mom's head like a stone. and then the other night, a carpet fell itself (migyht be unblanced, cause mom and dad had newly put it) and fell in to a glass thing and glass shattered with loud noise to all 3 floors stairs. so it were a silly coincidence of talking of conjuring movei and these things happening:D ok if these things (like leila incident) or the previous night's weird coincidence (i watched stranger things all last season. and mom who never ever watched stranger things saw a creature that is tied 4 or 5 snakes but very thick snakes and from their mouth, they open their mouth large and a nother creature comes inside from their mouth, like second mouth. so it were also silly coincidence(she never watched the movie i watched either that 1 night before. i were watching from my phone). and i think the following coincidence were sillya lso, i once in my dream (i very rarely see dreams(i must be seeing but i dont remember when i wake up?), that night i had very bad headache so i think its hyw i saw dream?)then i saw in my dream that my broither's nose bleeds. then in morning they told me nephew's nose bleed that night thats something not happening alot. but this is not creepy as it sounds cause my nephwe the other night bfore fighted with her mom on not sneezing (she were cold). so no wonder my brain thought of something sometopic of nose. so this werent a silly coincidence. so i might saw a nightmare like that due to that. but what i say is , what i ask is, if this were a simulation, and so why the fck simulation creator/creators torture me with a sociopathic stalker named rahmi? anyway. i am atheist. but sometimes very tiny times i ask whether if it could be a simulation or not.i think the weirdest coincidence were princess Leila;s incident. that i made a sculpture resembling princess' hair not intentionally, it just resembled, i just ah look the sculptuires hair resembled Leia, and then next day, i heard passing away of princess Leia (that amazing actor) the next day. so if this were a simulation, this incident would make me a medium i think, that saenses things? no no no that muyst be just a weird coincidence. (aha like the medium in Matrix movies? :) guhu the oracle/medium:P ok ok that topics wre just medium like coincidences ) ok if there were a God, i still dont ask help from God to even deal with a sociopathic stalker(has name of rahmi) situation:) i would fix that problem myself. as told i would create a game, buy either a mini island and or a cute home in Alaska that has a very huge garden. and also construct parties there and invite all wanna be friends yepp:)

ok coming to matrix movie and the little tiny bath tubes like structures that humans are inside, i do think its an analogy to mind/brain separation. i do think that movie is all about that. that tiny bath tubes resembles mom's womb? and it makes analogies to  our adult forms to babies in moms wombs saying whatever reality we confront is having the nature of mind/brain separation.  and that the reality we consume either when we are babies inside mom's womb or as adults, have such nature. i do think that movie is about mind brain separation topic and philosophies about that? (about virtualization i mean. like the nonbiological virtualization evolution's outputs crafted like computer tech and newly formed ai tech),  its about the virtualization tech of evolution? that our brains are also like computers but biological ones.  anyway this is also what everyone else thinks when they watch that movie i mean its not a hard conclusion to come at. but this is my idea on that movie and that little bath tubes actually resembles moms' wombs?
i see that bath tube topic in other movies about ai topic or virtualization topic like battlestar galactica. so mom's womb topic is used alot in context of virtualization. like Foucault would had wondered I would like to ask why? i mean why such concerpt not other concepts? cause maybe, as Freud told, its a topic that all humans have memory of, and thinking of usage of such topic would touch human's souls? to make those movies have more impact? or just its an analogies to future ai tech and the new wombs that are not any biologicakl wombs? i think its the latter one. predictions of future/myths about future. creating myths of the future. like creating new type of wombs to new virtualization holding beings of future? I mean the Foucault reference of, in two branch of epistemology and methodology, one is movie script writing and one is current tech thats in future opt to create such techs, why does the movie scripts take also the womb topic from humans early memories and use it like taht usually when they mention about virtualiuzation tech (ai).  why movie script writers dont take other topics from that area but usually the womb topic?  is it maybe because its a shared memory of all beings? so that using such topic becomes more interesting?anyway maybe matrix movie isnt any about such topic. i might wrongly concluded (most possibly). anyway, lets start the day and code my game:) i have plans to do like creating a nice life:) after 3 years of confronting stalk/socioapthy torture of a rahmi named sociopath. i would code my game, and buy a mini island or a cute home in Alaska with very huge garden.and create parties sometimes and invite all wanna be friends yepp:)



I somehow someway feel super happy now. and end of sea resting type. and tomorrow would study all day. and super happy scare/stress of confronting stalk from park infront of our home has passed. i one day two days felt whisky little bti to get over scare feeling i felt overwhelming stress/scare. but i dont know how, but the stress/scare passed now. in sea a guy shouted some sociopathic word (that is repeatedly said in this stalk for 3 years) whilst i were returning to shore. (i today swam in very deep waters not in shore (sicne scared of stalk again like everytime i am outside here)) then whilst retuning to shore, some word very unique to this stalk shouted,  so it might be stalkers? or not? i dont know. but i took my things on shore and went to car and went to aunts home where mom and dad were sitting and waiting me to return. then we all waited aunt to return to home as told.

so today were super nice i swam in places that passes my height. and i were alone and it were fun cause that sea has no waves is like a pool and has hot water (it really resembles mom;'s womb kind of thing when i lie on water :) (Freud becoming unity again feeling:) being in mom's womb again feeling:) we dont know Freud is right or wrong in that. that we miss that early period of life? or something that feels like that makes us relaxed? i think the latter might be true?  ) cause the water here is hot. this is at low latitudes place and water is super hot and i like it actually feels super relaxing)


ok lets study hard tomorrow. i think i decided an algorithm on part i am stucked on game's coding side. and code game. and buy a nice home in Alaska with a very big garden and or a mini island. yepp:) lets sleep early today. its 1:55am my early is this hour:)


ok starting studying yepp. lets code. 


ok i looked on cloud images to think of cloud algorithms details. need to store the generated cloud with some format so i render in game with just exture look up. it would be storiung spherical definition in a 2d texture. anyway first generate the clouds. and continue coding without getting stuck in details of algorithms. ok lets little bit think of my rendering algorithm, might have to revise it and need to as told generate lod representations all.  ok today lets code some clouds finally. after many times passed from initial brainstorming things.

ok i think i would store spherical data like this. for every zenith angle from 0 to 90 and from 90 to 180, i would have the simplistic representation of,  i would have another mini index texture that holds. from 0 to 90 azimuth angles each azimuth angles sample count. and in the main texture every texture line would store like those every sample points, so covering the sphere's circles with some ropes covering circles around every azimuth angle. and filling a rectangular texture like that. n many resolution of spherical coordinates stored in n many textures etc.  i know this is quite a simple algorithm but it would work i think. so rendering on gpu would take such spherical texture definitions and some rendering function/shader type based on that. so it would work in pixel shader... i figure out i forgot shader coding's some basics. lets go over physical rendering shader code to revise. ok lets review shaders logic from a tuto. i figure out i forgot lots of things in that domain. ok thinking whether how i could change the default texture lookup modes. anyway lets revise the gpu /shaders topic yepp. exciting day, i would code sky finally:)


hmm i think, i cant do that much vertex count to render clouds. i need to have many textures way. and statically render clouds aligned to sky. its meaningless to have that much vertext count and not efficient also. for sky's gradient colors,normal color blending mode would be enough? to have n many vertexes holding colors ? instead of textures? would check. ok its not possible to use such texture format? cause i just remember texture mapping simply doesnt work like that. ok lets brainwstorm more on. maybe i would do some spherical transformation and store texture alike that. not this way. cause this doesnt fit to how opengl texture mapping works. either i use a spherical projection form of image. cause its no use of trying to do with colors, to have efficiency, one must use textures. so lets choose our spherical projection mechanism. so i have to store my textures as normal textures way, not with such weird way. ok opengl textures dont work in the weird way i dreamt :D and there is no enough vertexes to have it define  with just vertex colors. so no run away from opengl type of texturing. ok. so need to create the default textures. lets revice texture cubemaps and spherical projectiojns to decide on one.or lets ltitle bit brainstorm more. hmm i wondered why there is no advanced gradient functions in opengl? why not? maybe i color sky in canvas? it had gradient coloring ? did canvas had gradient coloring functions? aha just a minute i can do gradient coloring in fragment shader. aha i completely felt like i am off topic in shaders. i completely forgot & remembering one point at a time?  ok, we could have my own weird texture format also, not needing to do store in spherical projected way. we could jut have 4 vertexes from vertex shader and in fragment shader(pixel shader) we color the sky with my weird texture format. ok back on track in shader knowledge topic. i felt lost for a while in opengl topic, i felt as i lost what i knew. ok back on track:) (ok i even forgot bump mapping how that works. )ok happy that i dont do pixel shadering the usual way:Di just need to pass 4 vertices, camera's place and field of view data to pixel shader and use my weird texture formats to paint it. ok. i lost track in opengl area for a while:) felt as i forgot what i knew all:) anyway back on track:)but do we need this much cost oinfragment shading? that i need to again switch to spherical projection and usual texture mapping due to that now again:) i mean whether its at vertext level or fragment level, do we need this?but there is no cost. thinking. ok since my texture would hold the data. there is no calculation. ok back on track.  ok so would have this weird texture data and there is not much cost on fragment shader, just need to transform each fragment to its related raycast point to the spherical texture def. i dont think such operation would be costly. or is it? we would see.i liked this method of spherical coordiunates definition of objects and its rendering in pixel shader:) and 2d texture storage of that also:) i liked my authentic way of coloriung sky. lets make it real asap:) ok maybe other people also do this spherical coordinate based ways? i dont know most possibly they do. but i liked this way:)thats my way:) i want everything important to be my way:) guhu the one fixated in authenticity everything:)
ok my next fav activity would be finding out matching songs to the technical issues i solve in the game and write in blog:D i find it fun:) to find songs about unrelated topics to be assigned to technical design things:D ok when the sky finally gets reafy i weould really cry of happiness:DDDDD thinking how many times i been working on this task:D
i would really cry:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

being a sivas born, we like to drink drinks and have gatherings with friends drinking (like Greece people).  and if my ece cousin is here by the time my sky is ready, for sure we would have a drinking gathering. we have funny memories on drinking with Ece cousin. that about vomitting and drinking some hard drinks when we drink together at home to celebrate something (whether its new year or just seeing after long after not seeing us). (since we are from sivas) (sivas people love to drink alot:D) (not all of sivas of course:D) i remember waking up in a vomit filled bed. that i vomitted without knowing:D and slept in place ewherte i vomitted:D so disgusting:D(it were tequila:D you never get how much drunk you get when youy driink tequila:D)  ok Ece cousin is coming here in some days super happy about it:) love having a drinking time with her:) (that friends gather ahnd drink and talk beside a nice sidelings. its a gathering/talk/drinking event). (i would cry to the thing my sky gets ready in that:D) (since it took alot long:D guhu the slow coder:D) (but i fixate in my own authentic ways:D and i might not be super intellgnt but super dedicated to develop my authentic ways:D ) i just only dont like raki (the drink sivas people like alot). i like whisky/tequila/vodka. not others. not beer either. and prefer wine only beside meal. but for such friends&drinking gathering, i would prefer either whisky or tequila or vodka:) i dont like raki, as if i am not from sivas:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD  not all sivas people like drinking. take my onder bro for instance. he doiesnt seem to. but me/my all cousins liek alot:D (its because of our dads liked to drink alot. our childhood passed in events when our dads came up to have celebrations with drinks or to talk business. drink /raki were never missing:) so we grew up beside drinking concept alot. so i also like drinking.and i am also interested to drinking :) bnut as told i only like to drink in such happy gatherings. not on my own.

i feel as a life i like is near in vicinity:) saving my self from stalk of sociopath stalker rahmi. and more parties :) that i do celebrate life with friends :) and working on projects i would craft:) such a future feels as near every day :) lets code the sky asap and celebrate it :Dthen terrain and other parts of game:)

my life were super fun when i were not stalked by sociopath rahmi stalker. i liked to go outside drink with my friends. then but a happy future is in vicinity again. i feel as a happy future is very near:) and is very near:)
as told, from my game, Ece is my secret shareholder, that shares my own shares, hmm i would share maybe 20% of my own shares to Ece since she also helped a little bit in the start of game project.  my other cofounder is my Onder brother. he shares 50% of shares.


if you have very life long friends, that drinking gatherings, is not it super happy:)  i am counting days that Ece comes and we do a drinking sofra to just drink and have talk with a friend:)


i alwasy wanted to have shaders of my own way:) i liked that concept of very game creating its own lighting /rendering way/own rendering engine in old days like  in between 2006-2010. it has been a left inner desire to have a game that has its own way of shaders even from 2010s in my heart:) and finally gonna have such dream accomplished and it would also save my life from sociopath rahmi's sociopathy/stalk:) yayyy:)

it were like, a new game would come and a very huge hype on its new topmost shaders would be talked for a long while and we game devs would have dreams of having our own game with our own such self different ways of rendering:)  look they did lightening in pixel shader for the first time! look this game engine is super succesful. kind of talks passed all game dev people's excited minds everytime we hear a new game engine/new game:)  we looked with amazed eyes to every new differenmt way of shader usage:) then i stopped being in game dev industry:)(i were actually in modeling and simulation industry but working on 3d viewer clients so that counts also as game dev to me since i played with simulation engines and game engines in that side:)) but i am back :)  i am back in game dev thing:) yayyy:) 

do any other game holds such weird texture format and uses just 4 vertexes to render sky? (i do think most of the games might be already doing this:D i just i figure out new to some topics in computer graphics, i had narrow vision in computer graphics area back when i were working on computer graphics related proejcts. ) 


i like what my mom and dad thinks of me:) they think i am a super powerful lady a "yigit" one that could handle any trouble :) so happy that i created such image in their mind :)  last day they stated their confidence in me:) somtimes they think i am lazy but in that times when they tell such sentence it is happy:)

lets code the sky and show to mom and dad asap:)

i think everyone is super strong. everyone becomes stronger when life gets harder:) i mean we all adapt to life:) when it becomes hard we become stronger:) (my life only became hard because i have got a sociopath stalker named rahmi. it can really turn life super hard. but i feel future very recent future my life would be happy again:))  i feel as my happy future is very near:) soon i would be saved from sociopath rahmi's stalk very soon:) (my game would save me:))


yepp i am back in game dev. in this reti project:) i worked in  project leading/ js/cpp/qt/big data/ml/backend services/frontend little bit things after wards. but back in game dev in this reti project:)



ok lets continue coding the game. then buy a cute house in Alaska with a huge garden or a mini island and invite all wanna be friends yepp:)

ok before moving to coding part, i am investigating this different way of rendering for whether its applicable to lighting of objects inside my game. ok enmough brainstorming on that.i think sh representation might work nice in creating advanced light on objects. this rope way (of representation of spherical coordinates) might be utilized to do have sub region texturing for lightening of objects? i think so. i thought i liked this rope based/spherical coordinates based fragment shader way i devised:) and thought where i could else use it. and came up advanced lightening of objects. so we have our usual vertexes and textures mapped to them and but for lightening, in fragment shader side, we do hold for each subregion in the model, as pregenerated light/shadow maps for diffuse lightening and having that 3d surface texture as original spherical harmonics based defined surface's definition along with changed field of view(camera's place) so, we have textures of such generated data again of lightening information of the object. thats statically generated. but in dynamic mini regions only dynamic checking of whether light direction in that mini region is shadowed or not  thing in some frames rate(not in real time, this shadowing would work slower than original framerate, it would be calculated along with some slower rate). so diffuse lightening becomes this rope texture reading only and also darkening it along with dynamic mini region calculations for checking of whether light is shadowed or not by other objects in the scene. that might be represented very crudely (the other objects). so we aghain have just texture reading just for to do lighetning. but for spot lights, that would be another story. ok i liked this rope or string based way lightening :) so my dream of having a game with its own different style of shaders is near to becoming real. of course there is lots of hardwork still left to be coded/worked on.  but its progressing:) and feels as a happy future is in the horizon:))))))))))))) ok i liked this way of using SH in lightening:) but liked my light info as texture information also:) spherical coordinates stored in 2d textures and lower resolutions of them also. so rendering becomes a precalculated scene generation and just texture mapping mostly in most of the important objects's diffuse lightening it would be. of course this doesnt map quite well to physical realistic rendering textures like roughness maps/normal maps/other maps i forgot name of? ok will figure out ways to change all these things merge them to do have nice rendering. might be useless to do ths in objjcts of game. but for sky its i think the best way.  ok lets sleep and wake early tomorrow. i need to review the phycial realistic renderer shader code to check what kind of efficiency such things could create or would create no efficiency kind of result might also happen. but for sky, its definitely alot beneficial. ok guhu goes to sleep:)


lets continue coding the game and invite all wanna be friends to parties/events as told :) all wanna be friends are always invited as told continuosly :) who ever like to be friedn to guhu the weirdo, is always invited to future events:) i really like friends:)


I am super happy since i talked with my distant cousin Emre friend. we all with friends went to Armin Van Buuren concert once while.  and he and his Greece gf made home parties and we attended. is one of the kindest human beings:) super happy we reinited contact:) hmm  he and his fiancee (Greece gf) are super cute/nice people:) is one of the most social and most kind people i ever seen:) hmmm i had once a life where i went to concerts:D it feels like as if its been ages since i had lost my social life. i lost my life's that aspect because i have got a rahmi named sociopath stalker. but thats gonna soon be fixed as told.my game would save me :) and i would create parties also and all wanna be friends are invited:) (my cousin inited contact with me and i am super happy to that. has been one of the dearest friends like all my current and future dear friends. (as told to a possible dear friend (dont know if wants to be friend but if wants i would be honored to be friend to:) i like friends:)) in hided paragraphs today:) ) i hadnt talked with Emre for ages:) so happy that he reinited contact. super happy:) this engineer cousin is also a DJ :) lives a very social life. a life i couldnt devised. i also wanted to be social like him:) though couldnt created and also i also last 3 years have a sociopath stalker named rahmi that tries to destroy my life with sociopathy. anyway. so whilst wanting be to be super social(like creating home parties), i have none social life for 3 years due to a rahmi named sociopath's stalker's sociopathy acts/stalk. since i scare of going outside or got continuosly disturbed with sociopathy. anyway my game would save my life from sociopathy:) and as told have dreams i told and would construct parties and all wanna be friends are invited:)


yayyy today found a nice song, that lyrics i ddnt liked but music/song is super energetic:)  that i repeatedly listen whilst:)


ok so continueing on agenda of coding game. and as told all wnna be friends (genius people(as told here to genius person long before in my blog:))/non genius people(people like me)/religious people/non religious people(people like me)/all wnna be frineds) are invited to parties in future if interested :) yepp:)

i have lots of tasks to do and i sometimes stuck in some part of code. lets rewin the productivity level i had 5 days ago. ok i feel i should finish sky for real this night whartver hours it takes to code.


ok if when if i write i write this function i need to do methodologize its probability density's functions areas under such phase regions. talking of scattering phase function and possible flux distribution.
ok i know my class names and definitions are stupid. but as told i am not super intellgnt.

hmm thinking of. for instance back scattering. it  happens frequently in Rayleigh type. but very little at Mie. though they say and i saw that thick clouds look very white at over clouds level (like we see in plane) that it has high albedo. if some thick medium absorps alot how its albedo could be high. so that thick type of clouds has actually scattering alot. but scattering is something that happens in directed ways. so that cloud's particles has more balanced scattering? so i still have no idea how high albedo happens at thick cloud surfaces? aha got it. it just doesnt reach the other end of cloud. but the high scattering happens in just clouds overall upper layers. ok i now got that. ok i still now nothing of solid knowledge in particle physics and scattering topic i think. e.g. black body radiation/absorption/reflection rates topics. but wuold try to setup something basic on basic knowledge but looking realistic like real clouds but not super phycial realistic in modeling simulation wise.



case class AtmosphereContent( val concentration:Double, val radii:Double, val opticalDepth:Double, val isCloud:Boolean=False) {

  def scattering(val length: Double, val angle:Double, val wavelength:Double):Double = {


i feel fatigue to this code piece i hadnt finished yet. lets accomplish asap. and save my life from sociopath stalker(mert and his friends)'s stalk.   lets build the game asap. lets not stuck at algo design points and progress much faster. lets stop noncoding state and progress asap. ok if i pass this point then i would progress faster. i feel as my brain power is gone to fishing:S it feels like that last 4 days. lets collect focus and accomplish these points i am stuck as asap so that i resume my productivty again.have problems with focus but i think i gonna rebuild it. i whilst dealing with stalk stress lost my focus last 4 days. but today is the day i should resume my focus yepp. otherwise i would never have any game and couldnt accomplish my goals.ok lets open some coding musics. yepp i forgot that concentration helper musics yepp. i am surprised. even start of song made me want to code:D these coding musics really really work to focus:) wov :)yeppp lets work till mornign nthis night. and rest till 3am. and but have something basic or not at the end. i might not write the shader. but the reti creator side's created 2d spherical coordinate textures should be ready. and the mechanism for that should be ready. this guhu manatee wants to go to swimming tomorrow afternoon. so should have some big accomplishment today. and tomorrow should work similarly till morning. and again go to swimming.

ok due to stress of not studying i ate alot food today:Sanyway. I were succesful in diet last days except today:S anyway lets continue diet also tomorrow.lets progress alot today. and go to swimming tomorrow afternoon. or code the shader tomorrow and show mom and dad the sky.yepp. lets go to swimming after that.gosh these coding concentration musics really works:) so note to myself, never forget to open coding concentration musics while working:S cause i truly lacked focus today and it felt like shit, that not studying while i have to to save mylife from sociopath stalker's stalk (mert and his friends stalk). lets write the fragment shader tomorrow:) it would be super fun:) i have already osgjs integrated web application (canvas with webgl mechanisms setup) and shader trial added. so would just change the shader's fragment shader code part to have the sky's baseline code. then clouds i think i might also render them maybe. or might use textures of pregenerated textures in scala side. clouds look too small but they are in 8kms above us.  they are actuallyhaving  0.5 kms or mroe length according to cloud type. last day thought of pregnerating cloud's diffuse images as textures with sun light direction and the scatteirngf. but then i thought maybe i have real clouds and rendered with spherical texture definitions like the sky or with adding a post processing effect on their rendered content. sky mighht need such rework for gaussian filter like filters to have smoother gradients. so the sky might be rendered as rendered once to texture and the texture is applied post processing effects and its set as bckground.  first i need to observe whether sky needs such post processing effort. would see after trials. yepp. lets see. maybe it wont be necessary. for clouds i also wonder how they would look.
lets never lose focus again cause it feels shitty to not progress in game. it feels super bad if i wont have a game. lets work till mornig today. paragraph by paragraph i am collecting my concentration/focus. nice:) yepp:)


ok i still couldnt decrypt the stalk incident:S i might misunderstood epilepsy word. i have got a high severe degree of sociopath stalker named mert. they also shouted grandpa to mert. but not sure if i heard epilepsy word correct. so epilepsy might be my misunderstanding. but i am pretty sure they shouted grandpa word. this psychopath stalks woman like: when you go to a coffee, if they come to stalk they would say such harrasing sentences like "mert should suck her".   this mert named psycho and his friends are definitely psycho & sociopaths:S constant stalk. never ending stalk. constant aliases. constant impersonation. constant never ending stalk to forever:S constant ork shoutings.  i couldnt decrypt well the stalker (whether is epil;epsy or not (whether i heard that right or wrong)) but for sure has name of mert (due to 2 days before's stalk sentences and 3 years ago sentences i heard) and once they shouted mert is a grandpa and in another incident they shouted mert is rich. so the things i could decrypt from this nightmare like stalk finally is the root stalker is a mert named sociopath. and has helpers to try to make me down by constant disgracing effort so that he could feel better since i dont look to him. i mean i confront a constant never ending disgracing effort whilst this stalk. and its at super harrasment level. constant impersonation/constant ork shoutings/constant curses. never ending stalk:S i dont know if i heard epilepsy or noit fully. i then remembered the epilepsy patient whom came to place where i go to noon 4 years ago. whenever me and myfriends have noon in a kebab place, an epilepsy patient would come to sit in a desk and would create sorrow /i would feel sorry to such stranger. so as soon as i heard some word that sounds like epilepsy (not sure) queried whether mert is that guy? whom always come to stalk me and our friends when we have noon in some kebab restaurant? maybe i heard wrong. i dont know. but what i am pretty sure i heard is: constant names i heard in this disgracing/stalk constant stalk/constant impersonation effort is some name set: which are as: mert/tolga.  by the way, our neighbour (Arabish neighbour?(in iskenderun home) dndnt gone outside to understand) said sentence "hande is ork". so this neighbour is related to assigning me aliases? since i decrypted in stalk incidents that these ork shouters gives aliases to me. so our neighbour related to this stalk i confront:SS? what the fuck:S ok i am helpless in decrypting the stalk visibly. i just understood that the root stalker is mert named from 2 days ago stalk sentences. as said, i figure out these people give me aliases adn create many characters. i first i had stalkers whom shout me ork which are hande/serra(not any related to cousin. serra name is common so this topic not any related to cousin ever)/ada. turned out they are the assigned aliases. these stalkers assign me character labels whilst they stalk me:SSSS i initially hadnt understood that. but in time get that from decrypting stalk sentences. I wish i had a helper detective whom helps me get whom are these psycho stalkers and with what motive they do craft such stalk/sociopathy acts against me? like giving aliases:S thats the most scariest one:S and i remember, today otuside soime lady shouted "Boris should get over". and as told i also heard Boris name alot in this stalk incidents so he is from these stalker people set visibly. ok i am helpless in decrypting whom these people are nor why they stalk an engineer like this:SSSSSSSSSSS i reconfirm one neighbour is related to these stalkers. cause a guy talked sentences outside saying hande is ork. before i would thought i have a hande named stalker and they say ork to her. i in time get that they call me hande alias.:SSS this stalk happens like this constantly endlessly for 3 years, just like this. I do think voiice were coming from Arabish neighbours. some people were talking and they named rahmi name also. they said "rahmi get over the complaint. ece is shizoid". then in other one sentence they told "hande is ork". and in other sentence they used sedat name. these sedat/rahmi/ece names i also heard in recurring stalk incidents. specifically sedat and rahmi name. i my self confronted in outside sedat trying to impersonate a foreign name people calling him both sedat and foreign name. so this sedat named perpetuator impersonates people. and not foreign people are impersonated, i am also impersonated/given aliases to:SSSSSSSSS there is a high degree of severe degree of sociopathy acts applied against me:SSSSSSSSSS a high vicinitty stalk happens for 3 years constantly. these people whom shouted "fukara" word also includes a can name:S 3 years ago i remember people saying "can pity to her". so can name also stalks. and 4 minutes ago some person said a sociopathic sentence and then said "can get over". ok some people are trying to mess with me with sociopathy. but luckily there is internet so that i can fight back against to sociopathy. ok a guy now talked "tolga should get over. ege has sent".  i heard this tolga name also alot in stalk incidents. he is also from these trying to mess with guhu with sociopathy people set. also ege name.  i get stalked like this constantly for 3 years by these sociopaths. but luckily internet exists so that i can fight back to sociopathy. so thanks alot to DARPA for inventing internet:)

i am not sure if the voices were coming from Arabish neighbour. may it come from park or street? possible. but it looked like their accent:Ssorry but i might be wrong. i wish i went outside to confirm where those people were. i could ask to my dad cause dad were also outside. lets check ask if that talks were from Arabish neighbours or not.


ok lets continue coding game. but i cant define how grateful i am since internet exists. cause thats the only way i can fight back against sociopathy i confront. super thanks to people who invented internet.
ok so this rahmi named person was wondering here? 2 days ago, they shouted "rahmi, she is oluk". oluk is one of the curses these sociopath stalkers constantly shout to me for 3 years beside the ork curse. and many more things sociopathic sentences. constant stalk. constant impersonation. a stalk that happens like this for 3 years. last day when i were inside sea, a guy shouted again "oluk" word. in outside in city center, a guy said "boris get over." and a guy replied "oluk is mine". so this boris named person is also behind this ork/oluk curses shouting. and also a rahmi named person also. and our Arabish neigghbours here might be linked to these psychopath stalkers. but lets confirm if those people whom talk voice came were really from that Arabihs neighbours.  i think it came because one voice really resembled theirs. lets check. from dad. snce my dad were also in outside.
i know the ork narrative also said by a hamit named person/stalker. last day a woman talked in phone saying "hamit, she should kill herself". so these stalker also has such request whislt their stalk? ok while my human rights are taken away with such dishonest impersonation/stalk, in front of such injustice, they want me to do such act? sorry sociopaths, this guhu has no weakness to injustice. she can fight forever to against injustice and sociopathy. so these sociopaths does these acts for such goal? to make me mentally ill and do such act since my honor is tried to be stolen?

ok this makes me come back to init point of stalk incidents where i heard kuma label:S 3 years ago, whilst i were in kilyos (i went to seaside)  a big family like people shouted me "kuma". i ddnt looked nor cared nor ever get interested to. in that subculture where "kuma" culture exists, woman have no human rights(in a feudal places, unfortuntaly some Kurdish culture. maybe 0.00000000001 of kurdish people. so they dont represent any kurdisgh people ever. such a small minority). e.g. in such families, womans whom dont listen to their families are killed with saying they killed themselves(they did suicide). so i think, there is high probability that, these stalk and as i see goal of this stalk is such suicide act? is quite high possibly rooted from the psychopaths whom shouted me "kuma". so they try to steal my mental faculties? and my honor/my grace. as the woman whom reject family decisions in such cults are killed with calling it suicide. since i am not from their culture or family, they try to steal my mental faculties with such sociopathic acts/ they try to steal my honor with sociopathic acts against me and they expect me to have suicide? oh stupid bastards! this guhu can forever fight against sociopaths and injustice. you have selected a wrongt woman target to ask such thing with doing sociopathy against her:)
ok i am super duper happy that internet exists so that i can fight against this sociopathy i confront in super high level:) super thanks to DARPA:) for once a while inventing internet. that even helps protecting woman rights. :)

so that when you reject a psycho whom shouted you "kuma" 3 years ago, he tries to steal your grace/honor with sociopathy and wants you to commit suicide due to that:D these bastard shas selected wrong target for such act. i can fight to forever against injustice and stalk and sociopathy. i lived my life in honor. so i would always be strong against this sociopathy i confront. and wwould forever to fight any injustice i confront with full strength.

i always queried whom these psycho stalkers are. but i think the answer hides in that sentence of "hamit, she should commit suicide". said while woman passed from place i were sitting with my family. so these psychopaths whom stalk me wants me to commit suicide:DDDD ah this is super funny:D they apply sociopath against me and as a result also want me to leave my life. ok these people are the most ignorant people i ever seen in life. i lived my life all in honor. and i can fight forever to injustice  and sociopathy. thats simple as this.  these psychopaths could only dream such thing in their dream. i am maybe 80% sure these psychopaths whom stalk me are linked to that "kuma" shouting 3 years ago. so these people wanted me to be a kuma? (so they are a kurdish subcult? but they dont any represent kurdish people. cause as told this traditions only belong to 0.000000000000001% of kurdish people. they dont anhy represent) and i never replied nor interested. and these people who have kuma tradition are also popular in killing woman whom disobey family orders (as i saw in movies) and showing it as suicide. so last day as i heard "suicide" word, i could decrypt the stalk more, that i understood these peeople try to kill my life since i rejected being kuma(nevewr got interested nor ever replied to). thanthey with sociopathy try to disgrace me with also trying to steal my sanity/mental faculties. with constant high vicinity stalk/constant impersonation/constant such shit i confront like sociopathy shit. ok i think now i have no queries whom my stalkers are. they are definitely linked to people whom shouted kuma 3 years ago. cause those kuma holding culture has the stereotype of killing woman and calling it suicide. now they try to kill my life with applying sociopathy against me/constant impersonation/constant stalk/constant trying to steal my mental sanity with impersonation/constant sociopathy/constant ork shoutings/constant curses, to repeat the event of killing woman one way or other in such ways. but super thanks to DARPA that they invented internet:) so that i can fight back against this sociopathy i confront:) super thanks:) really super thanks:) DARPA, the thing you created also quite help woman rights:) thanks:) my life is tried to be killed with applying sociopathy agaisnt me. but via internet i can fight back:) so super duper thanks to DARPA for inventing internet:) this internet really means alot:)
figthing against ignornace, fighting against sociopathy i confront:) all enabled by this super invention named internet:)


if one confronts sociopathy but has a way to deal with sociopathy she confronts, she could continue coding her game and her hackhaton night to code the sky:) yappp:)

ok i cldnt study nor sleep with thinking these topics. but wake up at 10:50 so i slept 5 hours. first thing i did, were asking confirming whether that talks came from Arabish neighbours(of our twin house). confirmed to be yes. so the rahmi namd stalker, who wanders around my house shouts sentences with a woman like "rahmi, she is oluk!" (with very hating voice) were visitor to our Arabish neighbours last night as i heard from their talks. they also said "hande is ork". hande is as told one of the aliases i confront. so either from the init, these stalekrs are have also links to our twin home's Arabish neighbours. (we have a twin home and our neighbours looks like(liked ) a cute Arab family. ) or as told its related to "kuma" word. i confront constant such ork/oluk like words for 3 years. so this be rooted to these peaceful cute family looking Arabish neighbours?:S or is it the kuma shouters once? ok trying to decrypt the stalk/curses/impersonation i confront. its for sure the stalkers inited contact with our Arab neighbours. but is it they were related from init stalk and do my neighbour has impact in stalk? like hating the residents of this city (since it belonged to another country very long before) and trying to break their lives with stalk/sociopathy? i dont think so. but this is one other very slight possibility. cause they guest the stalker whom is one active stalker (whom shouts ork/impersonation acts) last night. so they might have links to stalk i confront.either they are also victims of the sociopath stalker (that sociopath stalker himself inits contact to them and they have no relatedness. or they do have). ok. how can i learn whats going on:S I have got sociopathic stalkers that does even impersonation against me and tries to allegedly make me mentally ill with impersonatiopn/stalk/curses as i told. whom is behind this? is it the neighbour? or is it the "kuma" shouting 3 years ago? how could i figure out whom my enemy is whom is behind this sociopathy???? My idea is that these cute family has no relatedness to stalk, but that sociopath stalker also inits touch with them since they are our neighbours. i do think this cute family has none relatedness. but the sentences they told as were, they were backing the stalk. so whilst they might not be related, they are in stalker's side.  ok its like stranger things and mind stealer:S the sociopath even messes with my neighbours:S ok i think 4 days ago, this rahmi who is an active person in this stalk shouted with a woman, the woman shouted "rahmi! she is oluk!". oluk is the one constant curse i heard in this stalk all whilst. along beside all impersonations/curses of ork etc. and rahmi is the active stalker cause as told, i were waiting for bus in street here, a guy talked with phone loudly saying "dont disturb guher. rahmi has fired you". so this rahmi hires people to disturb me. so along this ork shoutings impersaonations one name i confronted in this stalk is also hamit for 3years. and 2 days ago, they passed beside where i were sitting and woman loudly told "hamit, she should commit suicide". so these acts have such agenda. to make a woman mentally ill and break down her psychology with ork/oluk shoutings, doing very ugly impersonation acts to her/to her life. these sociopaths has such goal. but let them know such goals are never ever possible. as told, i can to forever fight  against sociopathy and not would feel any milisceonds weak in that.the "kuma" shoutiung? happent 3 years ago summer. quite matches with time when ork shoutings started. a kurdish family (they dont any represent kurdish people. kuma concept is not common in kurdish people. maybe they are 0.000000000000000000001% of kurdish people. they dont any represent kurdish people) shouted me kuma. i never replied nor responded. so such kuma culture(they dont represent kurdish people) has tradition of killing disobeying womasn and showing it as suicide. but they do such acts to people from their families. since i am not from their family nor culture, they try to kill me with tryiung to kill my mental peace/my honor/my grace/with applyign sociopathy acts/impersonation acts. but their goal is the same, to kill the woman and have it as suicide. but as told, such thing is never ever possible:) i can to forever fight against sociopathy. if my life desire were 100%, after this sociopathy i confront, my life desire is 1000%:D so i mean they could only dream such thing in their dreams.  I do confront constant impersonation/constant curses/constant ork shoutings/constant oluk shoutings in this 3 years of stalk and this is my blog about this stalk incidents. I wish i could learn the identity of this rahmi named stalker. if the Arabish neighbours are perpetuators to the stalk, its meaningless to ask them if there is a rahmi named person in this place/around. but if they are also victims of sociopathy (like mind stealer topic in stranger things, the sociopath also impact them and visit them and try to manipulate them) then they would show whom rahmi is. should i ask them? they dont spend time alot in outside. truly. they always spend time inhouse. if neighbour passed to garden i could had init a talk and asking is there a rahmi named person around ths place  and mention little bit about stalk. to learn the identity of rahmi. because its one active person in this stalk events. just 4 days ago, a woman with very hating voice shouted "rahmi, she is oluk!" with a hatred tone that i hear also in "she is ork!". i remember when i were trying to write a business plan in a cafe in Galata, when i get outside some woman shouted "ork! (same with the oluk sentence i report same hatreed tone). she is hande!". i those times i thought i have a hande named stalker. and that moment funnily i asked myself, ok whom the fck is hande. ok she is hande. ok. what the fck these peole meant.its like as if i told a sentence no she is nt hande to someone and they rteply with "ork! she is hande!" i get that moemnt like that. and i always thought i have got a hande named stalker those times(3 years ago).  just only the last year i understood these  people tell me hande alias in another stalk incidnet. it sink down to me so fast in another stalk incident that, they try to call me "hande". so there goes the aliases topic. and hande isnt the single name.  i constantly heard "fukara!" "ork!" "oluk!" shoutings with same super hatred tone last 3 years. ok i still cant decrypt what the fck is going on and whats these stalkers motive in doing this torture/impersonation/stalk act against me. but i get it as from last stalk incidents, its either "kuma" shouters. or some people related to the Arab neighbours (of our twin house). i just dont believe its related to neighbours because they look innocent cute nice family. as told, they always spend time in house. we never see them in balcony. and so i find no chance to ask about this rahmi name. but i dont think they have any role in the stalk i confront. so it must be "kuma" shouters. since they expected the stalk victim to have suicide. it really matches with that subculture that kills woman and calls it suicide? really does. so when the woman rejects being kuma to such subculture(3 years ago), stalks/impersonates/does sociopathy acts against/tries to steal her mental health/tries to steal her honor/grace to for such agenda thats repeated to woman in their culture(as told they dont any represent kurdish people. this kuma culture only exist in 0.0000000000000000000001% of kurdish people. its a very rare subculture. not common.).  but still whatever i write here stays in my head as possible possibility. that evil neighbours also stays as possibility. i dont know the motive of these people whom stalk me like this. i dont know whom they are yet. i just heard their names in such ork shoutings/in such stalk. but i dton know whom they are. i wish i learn in sometime. its either kuma shouters(of 3 years ago) or an evil neighbour situation.

my feelings on this very dishonest stalk/impersonation/sociopathy i confront: Its like super creative. i mean these people not only impersonate in single name the stalk victim. its like a multidimensional stalk torture. they dont stalk torture with just one way, they do this in multidimensional (with multi impersonation efforts) way. i mean the victim feels as(me) she has many stalkers. i mean, they do this stalk/impersonation torture against me not in single ways, its a multi ways done. with multi aliases. but with constant curses like "fukara!" "ork!" "oluk!". and these arent the curses that makes me super anxious. its the impersonation/aliases that makes me super stressed. and its not one alias. i do confront many aliases from these psychos. and many character assignments. so as told, this torture as happens, its not a simple curse shouting like stalk. i get impersonated by multi characters. i know its like an alfred hitckok movie. but i do report as it is. and that part is the scariest part of this stalk, the impersonation topic. not only i am impersonated, people from my life also got impacted for impersonation acts(they also get impersonated). i know this looks like an insane story to readers. but it really exists. so life could get super hard when having a sociopath stalker. but we also become strong when life gets hard.

these people have also super powers(mnot super powers like super ppowers in movies) of being abnle to stalk a person like this in multi cities. so this is like a nightmare. but i am quite strong. 

i figure out one other alias given is tomris. as told, this torture of stalk happens with assigning multiple characters/aliases to the stalk victim. or tomris is one person from stalkers i dont know.

but the thing is this type of torture type is new? i mean torturing people like this? giving them pseudo character assignments and curses alike? i do think this is either a cult doing this? but honestly, i do think, i do confront a torture type like thing? is not it like that? is it the arab enighbouor doing this? or the "kuma" shouter ignorant people(3 years ago)?

its definitely not any single character created and assigned and the victim is stalked like that. its multi charactyers at the same time. but similar curses. like oluk, fukara and ork. 

is this a new ingenious way to violate human rights? whom which cult is doing this torture against me and for what reasons? what is the motive of this torture? is it jealousy? is it arab neighbour doing identity politics? is it kuma shouters(3 years ago) doing the usual killing woman and showing it as suicide thing?  one thing i am pretty sure is that this is a type of torture. that creating pseudo aliases and assigning to stalk victim and giving her characters pseudo characters. this definitely is torture. cause i have got one name and one character. that i am proud of. i am a f,ckng strong computer engineer graduated from one best university. and why the f,ck i confront this torture? is it jealousy? is it identity politics of neighobours? (if they are racist and hate other people than arabs? its just a sick theory i crafted since they guested the stalker last night as i heard, the stalker whom shouted me oluk curse 4 days ago) or is it kuma shouters and they are repeating the act of trying to kill woman and tryiung to show it as a suicide? (that belongs to that subculture for real)

my human rights are severely violated. and i dont still know whom is doing this. its either evil neighbour situation or kuma subculture that kills woman and shows it as suicide.

i am confrointing a severe form of human rights violation/torture like this the way i tell for 3 years. constant impersonation. constant curses. constant high vicinity stalk that never ends. constant ork shoutings. constant oluk shoutings. you have to hear the hatred level in that ork/oluk shoutings.

last year they started shouting also a "kava" named label. in a shopping center, a tall woman passed shouted a curse and said me "kava". so also labels are told. that i dont even know what they mean:S
not multinames and also labels i dont know wht the f,ck they mean. constantly confronting ork/oluk/fukara shoutings last 3 years, but last year also some labels like "kava" also had been shouted. so they assign labels to the pseudo characters they create and assign to me. and as told, i am stalked with multi characters type of stalk. the stalker gives me aliases, call me different names, and tells me labels i have no fckn idea wht it means.  kava label is pretty new. i heard that last year. but ork/oluk/fukara are shouted for 3 years. and also aliases are shouted (that i thought those woman names are stalkers, turned out they are aliases /characters created by these stalkers and assigned to me). what i think of kava label, all this impersonation shit ddnt worked out, i hadnt got mentally ill with this torture like stalk of impersonation thing, and they moved on to from multi names to labels also. kava thing is new. i heard in stalk incidents last year. for 3 years i heard aliases (which i had till last year had no idea were aliases assigned to me). that they craft pseudo characters and assign to me and stalk with like that. but kava is new. i dont know what the fck kava means. but this is the new word i hear in stalk incidents. so another craft of pseudo character. i mean another sociopathy act. a new character dimension from pseudo characters created by these sociopaths. and i do think the arab neighbour is definitely in this task. cause i heard her voice shoitng kava word 10 minutes ago. so she is related to this pseudo characters creating and assignment type of torture/stalk. constant impersonation. i do confront. constant hgih vicinity stalk with severe degree of sociopathy like this.not only me, people from my life are also impersonated.

what impact this human  rights violation including stalk created:

i lost my social life last 3 years. since i entered trauma due to confronting ork/oluk/fukara shoutings. but the strongest trauma were last year, since i figure out what the fck is happening, that i am assigned pseudo created characters/labels by these sociopaths. that is the year i entered super levels of trauma and stopped ever going outside from house not to ever confront this mental health breaking targeting/honor stealing operation of these sociopaths.


so what impact this sociopathy had in my life: this human rights violation:
i made my nose with rhinolasty but due to stress, i eat my mucus inside my nose with my big fingers since i am in trauma. so my nose nostrils got super ugly and the rhinoplasty i did went for none. i have to do rhinoplasty again. this is just single once impact.
others:
as told i felt prolonged fear periods. and i completely stopped any social life.
and my economy also went bad. cause i since i were stalked in one house surrounding, whilst i have none money rented a house that looked more safe to my eyes. then i got debted due tot aht. than mom and dad came and they ddtn liked the house i rented, so they rented another house so but i payed back them cause i dont like reflecting my costs to them. so i got debted more. but luckily, i have always supportive parents so that currently my debts are payed by my parents. i am a proud person that doesnt ever want to be any burden to parents. but this happent out of my consent. i have a life that i am stalked by sociopaths. so being burden for 3 montsh its ok in my eyes.
other impacts: trauma. little bit ptsd? dont know. i mean i am constantly stalked. i dont need  ptsd to scare either. i mean stalk constantly happens already.
another impacts: hmm i liked social life so much. i liked going to concerts. i liked gpoing to parties. all gone. since i started to scare going outside.

hmm other impacts: none. it turned me a stronger person. but as told, i lost my social life for 3 years.  and also lost my nose's look whilst i ate my nose's mucus (when noone sees me) due to trauma's stress.

but know what, everything gonna get fix. i would save my life from stalk torture of these sociopaths.

so it also had nice impacts like making me a very strong person. since i confronted trauma, i became a stronger person.



ok i would save my life from this human rights violation i confront for 3 years. (a new torture type of creating psuedo characters and assigning and stalking alike with such sociopathy).


i told my way. its my game. and i would buy a cute home in Alaska with a huge garden. and create parties and invite all wanna be friends.



what i would do right now: give a rest. and go to swimming. and sleep pver water thats super relaxing like the way i tell.  dont know. bbut i would go to swimming now:) yeppp:) want to have some fun. after stress of last night. and then would continue coding the game yepp.
what i loved my memory of seaside: buying same things. like i stop at smae market. buy 2 or 3 bananas(since i am in diet and dont want to buy fast food instead), a cola, 2 waters. and i have a mini full of flowers images bag(i bnought that for my french course when i lived in istanbul:) long before. ). that i carry my things. and I go to a nice shore. lets have this resting rituel. i really liked it. lets create some more energy before i continue coding yeppp:)

----

i dont think arab neighbours are doing identity politics. since they look like nice people. but they are visibly manipulated by the root sociopaths (e.g. rahmi named person whom shouted me with a woman "oluk!" last day)  similary shouted "ork!" 2 years ago. i have been shouted thousand times these kind of words by these sociopath stalkers. the thing they guested the stalker(they lasted guested a rahmi named person. and from their talks they talked thing like "hande is ork!". the thing that last night they guested the sociopath stalkers  doesnt mean they are perpetuators to stalk. it more means they are manipulated by the sociopath stalkers i think.  i think sociopath stalkers only reached out our twin neighbours. that doesnt mean the arab neighbnours are any perpetuators or the root stalkers. these neighbours, they look like quite nice decent people.  i dont think they are perpetuators. but just manipulated. to guest the sociopaths(rahmi named sociopath) whom stalk me.I would go and ask whom is rahmi from them when i see them in balcony. but they never spend time in balcony ever. so not possible to do detectiving to inquiry name of rahmi. with asking whether they know some one named rahmi and telling them about the stalk. hmm. if i see the neighbour outside in balcony, i would deifnitely for sure ask. cause this might enable me to catch these psycho sociopath stalkers that does such new ingeniuos form of human rights violation of creating pseudo characters and assinging and stalking like that, and not only one character, multi characters.
i were stalked everywhere. in multi cities. i remember some group of woman shoutiung "hande is fukara!" i thought i had a hande named stalker  whom is shouted fukara. but last year, in latest last years last 6 monbths i understood that hande is an alias/pseudo character created and assigned to me by these sociopath stalkers. its a new way of torturing people? a new way of human rights violation? stalking poeple with sociopathy? with creating pseudo characters? i think this is definitely 100% human rights violation and a new type of torture. a psychological torture type. with sociopathy acts against the stalk victim.

needless to say, i have one name that i am super proud of and one character. i am a computer engineer thats graduated from one best university of here. and all this stalk started whilst i were trying to create startup and but the stalk i confront makes me stronger as a person.  I am proud of whom i am(i am a guher named very intellgient computer engineer)&whatever i accomplished in life(i worked in various areas in computer engineering field like ml/big data/computer graphic/backend/frontend/also project leading. hmm i managed 8 succesful telecom projects(the development and baby sitting periods, managed multi teams in developing the project outputs, though the peak team size were 8 or 9. i mean not big teams but as told, telecom projects that are utilized in telecom operators). hmm 1 very big 3d client project(thats like a simulation that is also little bit like a game and also seme simulations that even render webpages inside them whilst year were 2009:D (thanks to mozilla browser:) integrated mozilla plugin to my 3d engine, and the simumlation there (where people could enter with avatars) had web pages on 3d boards inside the game:) its in 2009s something i accomplished that years:) though most credits goes to mozilla plugin writer:) but it wernt working so i had to do barycentric calculations to do 3d point to texture images coordinate mapping to mozilla plugin intercommunication:) ) ). many qt based desktop apps/ voip solution/hmm cpp coding/ml algorithms design/big data engineering(with spark and aws emr and all that stuff and also with spark streaming) /front end coding/micro services coding with python/scala.  I mean i am a talented computer engineer ) and these sociopaths cant mess me with such sociopathy acts against me.  I am proud of whom i am, my name and my life and my accomplishments also. and this multicharacter craftmanship type of torture&stalk?(creation of pseudo characters?) they gonna see they cant do such sociopathy acts to a person who lives a proud life and whoi is prouid of whom she is and her name also. they would see all their dishoinest sociopathy effort would go to nonsense.



so this is the new trend in human rights violation ways/torture ways? creating pseudo characters to a person and stalking him/her with assigning pseudo characters/names/aliases????? creating virtual characters and stalking the person with such pseudo/virtual characters. is this the new trend of human right violators(is it a new form of torture?)?

needless to say, i have only one name which i am quite proud of. it means jewel also:) and lived a proud life. and gonna continue living like that.




anyway. this sociopathy i confront make me stronger. and i want to go to seaside now:) yepp. lets prepaere. and then continue coding my game. though dad went to somehwere so lets both prepare and wait dad to come back(he must went tp city) so that i cna go to seaside. yepp. lets swim a little bit.


hey horror movie writers, you could just check my blog to take topics of. arent my sociopath stalkers are if they are from horror movies and the thing i confront isnt it like a horror movie?. i do think so. i do think this thing i confront this sociopathy i confront is like as if from horror movies(like sociopathy related horror movies).  any movie writer needing a scrupt/story, could take my real life's last 3 years of stalk. its free to use in horror movies. i do confront a stalk thats like horror movies. but as told, i am strong and would be strong also in future.



today's agenda: as told swimming. then coding sot aht i buy a cute home in Alaska with a huge garden. 


i want to close my eyes and find myself at least 8000kms away from here. i have got a socio psycho stalker.

to reach out rahmi named stalker, i would ask the neighbour (i do think they are also impacted by stalk. i mean its not they had stalker guest because they are related to stalk, its because the stalker also of course communicates with our house's twin neighbours. they are a cute family(of Arab origins). they have non relatedness with my stalk. )


ok i gonna have steel like nerves whislt these people came around my house shout out sociopathy. i do think, this is really like a horror movie of sociopathy. i have got a mert & rahmi named stalkers visibly. and i confront these all impersonations/pseudo character creations and its not only a single character. in one character they created they call me alabel and call me also gay. whilst i am not gay but respect 100% gay people. in another they shout me "fukara!" they shout me hande or other like aliases. in another character alias is different as told.  iun another, there is another alias. i mean they stalk me with multidimensional character creation stalk with character creation way.  I know this feels like a horror movie from horror movies. it is really like that. i mean people might have problems in believing such insane incidents. but it really happens. so i figure out sociopathy is a severe dangerous illness and we sociopath stalker victims should have theraphy groups. my sociopath stalker creates multicharacters/labels to me:SSSSSS this is like a horror movie:S and calls very ugly words:S and stalk also happens with all aloing ork/oluk/fukara shoutings. ok i need to have steel nerves whilst dealing with this sociopathy. and i think we sociopath stalker victims need theraphy groups to talk just talk. my theraphy way with dealing this is my blog writing. and also its my way to fightback agaisnt created sociopathy/created characters/labels by the sociopath. so i am super glad that internet exists. I am super happy internet exists that i can fight back against the sociopathy/character creations(hande/ada/etc...)/label creations(what the fck kava label means? its one label. and there are uglier labels also) somehow somelittle bit way. i mean if internet ddnt existed, i would had felt helpless but super happy that internet exists so that i can fight back the sociopathy i cofnront. i am created lots of labels. 3 i counted. all look very disgusting to me:S andf names i counted 3 or 4 names assuigned. so totally 4 characters created by the mentally ill sociopath's fantasy world and also 3 labels(one is kava. wht the fck kava means?). thats all i counted. we sociopath stalker victims definitely need theraphy groups. sicne sociopathy is really like horror movies. i feel like victim in horror movies everytime the soico shouts me with label he crafted:S its super stressing thing. i wish we sociopath stalker victims (how many there in world such people like me exist? i mean people stalked by sociopath illness holding people?  how many are ther epeole like me? is it alot. or is it little? ) (its like i never bullied in school, but get bullied in worse than school way in life. the bullier creates fantasy characters to me and labels which dont sound as good things. i am fighting against a sociopath (mert&rahmi named people) but things gonna get resolve in time. life gonna get better. lets take coffee and code the game's code.constant impersonation. thats the summary of the stalk i confront. i am constantly impersonated and names/aliases/labels assigned.i dont any find the ork/oluk/fukara shoutings which also happen as disturbing. i get used to such type of curses from this sociopaths. but the impersonation thing is the now and last year's disturbing thing. its the super disturbing thing. i last year figured out i am impersonated. before i thought those names are also people from stalker people set. then it sank to me in one stalk incident that i am impersonated with such name. then before stalk were like super disturbing but ok i said ok i could handle that. but after understanding that i am impersonated, it became super duper extreme levels of scary. cause labels one i dont know meaning of, other one feels quite disguting meaning. i mean this character creation type sociopathy is super scary and super disturbing:S i mean the creation of characters/labels. its the super duper scary part of this stalk. the sociopath assigns me whatever character he wants me to be as. and articulates people wth stalking me with such name. this is the summary of this stalk. he gives labels/names. ion one character he assigned me as a gay woman. (i am not any gay). so many characters. so i really wonder, are there in world people like me confronting such behavior i confront ? i mean are there other sociopath stalker victims? that get disturbed with multi character creation type disease. the sociopath creates characters/labels to me. whatever he wants. and has power to articulate people telling me such names/labels. is a rich person (the mert named socio. they shouted this mert named socio is rich ). so wonder what other people howe many names are assigned by their sociopath stqalkers? i mean if there are other victims stalked by sociopaths and given many names? my sociopath stalker up to now as i get assigned me 3 or 4 names and 3 labels/roles. one label(kava) i dont even know what it means. other 2 labels looks super disgusting also. my sociopath stalker is a super creative one. i wonder, if anyone in world other than me exists that has such sociopath stalker whom assigns many names/many labels to them? is this illness type i confront is common or rare? e.g. how many labels/names a usual sociopath whom creates multi characters to other people creates? i mean is it usually 3 or 4 like in my situation? (just names part is 3 or 4. labels/roles: 3. , so in total  6 or 7 names/roles my stalker creates/assigns. is there any statistics on this? how much names/roles sociopaths creates usually? are there stalk victim of sociopath stalkers like me? are there any people like me? that confront such type of this much name /roles creation type of fantasy world creating sociopath? i want to learn whether my sociopath stalker is creative sociopath or this is the usual state of sociopathy illness? i wonder what i go through, does this happent o other people? if so, please and please lets set up a theraphy group. we really need after all this illness we confront unwantedly. one other label is aga:S i figured out these people also try to call me aga. and say i am an aga who is gay. ok this is the 3rd role. (i am neither gay(I respect gay people) nor any aga. i hate feudalism or such things.) (this is just another character/role created) (and i feel like i am inside a horror movie whilst confronitng this sociopathy). and 3 such labels. 3 or 4 names i counted also. one is hande. one is ada. one is serra(not any my cousin. this topic has none relatedness to her. she is a super good super nice person not any related to this stalk i confront, just serra names is commonly used so its just another name i guess the socio creates)/might also be calling me ege/ might be calling me some other name also. many names. many roles. many characters. one role even has gay gender other roles are hetero as i get. i mean, its a multidimensional character set that the sociopath mert crafts. many names/many roles. yes i also think i am inside an alfred hitckok movie and beign stalked by a spcyho named mert. yes i do think so. and any movie script writers could use this story its free to use. i mean its my life's last 3 years but you could freely use this topic in horror movies. cause its really like a horror movie. i constantly many times felt trapped insidfe an alfred hitckok movie whilst confronting sociopathy acts. I wonder are there people disturbed by acts of mentally ill people. is this a curse of ours family? my Gulnur cousin were not knowingly married to a shizoid man:S and she became temporarily social phobic afterwards but that it fixed. i am stalked by a sociopath for 3 years. i am not neither bf nor married to but disturbs me no less different. the socioapth stalker could articulate people to stalk me. with sociopathy. (has mert name as i finally understood). its super hard to be disturbed by wrong doing of mentally ills:S but i do think i would had preferred a shizoid mentally ill instead of sociopath if i had to have a mentally ill stalker. or a borderllien one? or other type.  cause sociopathy is the worst:S i do think the nightmare i confront is the worst:S this pseudo character/names creation thing i confront is super disturbing/irritating. i would had preferred, if i have to had a mentally ill stalker, i would had preferred,a shizoid one. but i do see that getting stalked by sociopaths is a curse in ours family? since my cousin were married to a shizoid. (she became social phobic afterwards that marriage and but fthat fixed). me, i think i am super strong and i would heal for the impacts(which are only psychologiucal and also impacted my nose nostrils since i repeated disgusting behavior of eating my nose's mucus when i am super stressed(in traumatic sitatuon) (and when noone is around, i dont do that behavior any outside) and that i have big hands) of this sociopathy i confront. I definitely understood the root stalker has mert name. its pretty very high confidently sure fact. cause due to last 3 days stalk incidents/sentences. so the sociopath has mert name. aha i forgot one other name the sociopath crafts is tugra. i also initally had thought tugra is a person in stalker people set. turned out its another character the sociopath has sick fun of creating in stalking me. and this mert name sociopath has power that he could make me get stalked with all these names. so i wish i had a poor sociopath stalker or a shizoid sociopath stalker. i mean this really is super shitty state of life. and that aga label, i also thought aga is another person. and but figure out the stalker also assigns such label to me. another delusional role/character. in this character, i am assigned role of being gay. i am not any gay nor ever been. this is just another delusional role/craft. i like gay people actually. i mean i am just only angry to "aga" label. it feels super disgusting/disturbing.  what is the role thats created in this "aga" character i wonder. one another role/name created/assigned from the multi dimensional role set character set.  my sociopath stalker is a super creative one. thats why i wondered what is the usual count of characters/roles sociopath people create? i really wonder the statiustics on this topic.  as told, first label/name i discovered is hande. i discovered the names/aliases topic only last year of 3 years of stalk (i am not a super intellgnt person right:) but i never had experience of getting names roles from a sociopath stalker beforee. thats something very new in my life. so i had no previous such experience that i understood that that i have got a sociuopath stalker whom crafts names/characters/roles to me in last year of 3 years of stalk i confront. before i though i have a stalker and shouts ork/oluk/fukara to me. before i had no idea that this shitty person also creates characters/roles to me. its the only 3rd year of stalk i discovered that scary fact. )


 


ok i went to sea. i got loits of weight awhile and but ddbnt cared and went to sea. and it were really relaxing. it were suepr relaxing. i spent time till late hours. and fall asleep on shore for 15 minutes. and swam alot. it were super relaxing. 


ok agenda:
code the game.  have rhinoplasty again but this time it wont get uglier (have such op next year). buy a cute Alaska home with a very huge garden(and create parties and invite all wanna be friends). and go ask the twin house's neighbour rahmi named person whether she/he knows  whom rahmi is. maybe i could catch the stalker rahmi from neighbours help. but maybe he/she doesnt help, its ok. i would either way be saved from stalk, i would code my game and buy a cute home in Alaska. and create parties.



ok the sociopath stalker shouted "my victim! get over trying to save yourself. "  and beside all characters he creates for me(doing impersonation to me and other people) that he also articulates other people in stalking me with such characters,  he also articulates a gay woman to stalk me. the woman stalks me as if i am gay. i am not gay nor never been gay. (and i respect gay people). i am not gay. i been always hetero and would be always like that. like i am a weird  person and i always would be like that. Its like being hetero is like character trait or its something inherent. like i am a weirdo and would be always a weirdo, i am a hetero and would always be hetero. I think being gay must be cool, but these things are inherent.not decided. i am hetero and would be always hetero.



ok i dont any care what the sociopath stalker says(as he means i cant run away from his stalk). could do anythign for socioapthy/stalk. i dont care.



ok today i am working. first did relatives visiting. since my cousin's wife (pregrnant nbearly 7.7 months)  came to stay at his fathers home (for last months of pregnancy) i visited for her. hmm. and i also like uncle's wife as a person. then now studying to the game. my mom and dad went to aunt's home. and me in my cute room working for to create gamey.




i feel like i am traveling some hidden places when i enter irc channel i dont know why it feels like that:D had entered gamers channels for to check if i can find game dev friends:)

i never been any time any hacker but when i enter irc channels, it makes me feel like as if i am a hacker:D i am not any hacker. just enterede to create friends and talk whilst coding things.  some people that makes fun of me and i make fun of them,  friends. i missed having people around me when i do code that tells funny things.

my nickname? its gamedev012q4  :) (in Afternet, in #gamedev i am. i said hello but noone talks here yet:) i also entered #gamedev  in EFNet :)


yayyyyy i found a friend:) super happy state:)

ok i finally restarted writing code:) ok mie scattering functions? ok i would model them in dummy form cause i dont want to try to calculate the legendre plynomials things in that. it wouldnt be physical realistic. i might add that later in future but not now. lets have a working demo asap.

ok i learnt a nice cpp to webgl/js conversion project from friend:
https://emscripten.org/docs/introducing_emscripten/index.html

but as told i am currently not coding cpp project. it would be initially js and webgl since i dont like to code cpp (want to code this way i code) android and ios versions might come later based on cpp code. but web code i want to code it in js & webgl. since i dont have mood of coding cpp these days. i know cpp is nice but as told, i feel fatigue to cpp i dnt know why. maybe after js version is ready, i would have to code android ios versions in cpp (i am a cpp origin coder) but for web i would initially code in js. since currently cpp feels uninteresting i dont know why. ok i know the reason, the effort that would go to turning cpp to js even scared me from now. i would code two separate frameworks i dont care the necessary effort for that:DDDDDDDDDDD i predict thwat some parts might not be converted as way i want, and i would have to learn the converter framework. better code js in native js way:P dont want cpp to js conversion in my silly code:P and maybe because i dnt code cpp for ages. i ujst dont like to code cpp (i would code cpp when passing to android/ios versions ) there i would again use osg game engine. currently i use osgjs a port of osg for js.

code comments are always super funny or git commit comments:D
including mine:D

  package models.atmosphere
 

  case class AtmosphereContent( val concentration:Double, val x:Double,val isCloud:Boolean=False) {
 
    def optical_depth(val wavelength:Double):Double = {      if (x<1.0){
         wavelength match {
           case 300 => 1.2237
           case 350 => 0.5653 
           case 400 => 0.3641
           case 450 => 0.3641
           case 500 => 0.1452





and git commit went as: :D => git commit -m "adding finally some lines of code after ages :D"  XDDDDDDDDDDDDD

ok i am super happy since i coudl reinit coding thing. i think entergin irc helpt to enter coding mood. ok being in irc really feels like being a hacker:D (i am not any hacker:D)

ok i changed the comment to since this looks nicer=>
//my project-> so i am the boss :D


ok Jacob Groening: this music feels addictive:)
specifically this one: (i get addicted to it right now:) whilst listening while coding now)
https://soundcloud.com/jacobgroening/jacob-groening-live-at-bespoke-nye-2015-new-york



now i would show a sad image:S :)

this is my hello in EFnet's gamedev group:P (noone yet talked to me:S) (its sad and funny also:D)

i found  a friend in afternet's gamedev group yet. but he or she went away.


ok i newly read right now, from news a hacker story. i am not hacker and never would be:)
irc groups i entered are just only about game dev:)

when a game dev feels alone/hvng no friends, enters irc:) (asking where are other game devs?   and yayyyy saws game devs:) so i shouldnt resembled irc to hacker's place. i dont know just switching to older tech felt like that(that as if its a such a place) . but i am not any hacker nor would be ever nor ever interested in:) only reason i entered irc is finding game dev friends whom i could talk to:)

ok never would make irc to hackers place ever again. i dont know why it stayed in my mind like that. its because its older tech and bare tech so when i think of irc i cant stop thinking of whether it might be such place. but i guess it is not. and i am inside game dev groups which are just about game dev:)


i want to have also techie friends :)   beside nontechnie friends. irc looks a nice place to find techie friends:)

there has been jokes about quaternions:)  ok i have found nerd friendset:) yayyy:) beside wnating to have non nerd friends i also want nerd friends:)    


yayyy there has been jokes about star wars and quaternions also:) (ok i found nerd friends:) yuppi:) ) (its not super easy to find nerd friends:) )       (i dont know where nerd people hang around in internet. they actually dont hangaround in intern et alot? (since they usually work in offices and in non work time they hangaround in real life) so its really not easy to find nerd friends easily in internet:) finally found nerd friends:)ok some only little  percentage of nerd people like to hangaround in irc. and i found such place where quaternions is talked:D and also star wars:) yayyy:)  its super happy:) i found friends whom makes jokes about star wars:) i feel like coder i wanted to be as when i am a game dev:) (my dream were  being a coder like thief game's coders :)  (cause these people in games credits made a cool video of them with shoodies. i mean they looked alot cool. i wanted to be like them:D (talking about high school:D)   (i dont feel quite like a coder when i am doing other types of coding. i dont know  why)

i definitely want friends whom makes funny jokes at 2am whilst i am coding with caffeine filled brain. i want friends whom are awake at such weird times and do funny jokes:D i wish i could setup such friend cycle now from irc :)
i had once been in environments where my colleagues were super funny and did funny jokes:) lets wish could find such people from irc:) like i also want nontechie friends, i also want to have techie friends:) (that who would make me funny jokes at weird times:D) i mean whatever gets talked after 12am becomes funny inherently: )i dont know why.finding being awake at 3am or 2am goes back to my university years. in those times, we did computer homeworks in labs of department. and whenever you go to our department, there were people wandering in corridors at 2am. thinking of a n algorithm to homework/project. causde the homeworks assigned were super hard. so people we usually worked t ill 4am to solve it. and the talks at 2am were also super funny:D i mean whilst everyone is dreaming/sleeping, working at such hours has kind of fun aspect and definitely talks at those hours are super funny: )  like friend desparately walking in corridor sin ce he cant fix his algo, he making jokes of us, we make jokes about him etc.:D that after 12am coding thing is really fun.:)it were the only department i think where its still crowded after 12am:D it were funny. you would see friend sleeping on a wooden desk desperately just for 1 hour, cause the homework's deadline is most possibly the other day or alike and homeworks were really hard. and we made fun of our desperate state in talks:D  in every sitting place, one coder with red eyes due to sleep deprivation or newly woki8ng up from ltittle bit sleep you can see all spread around departments( computer engineering dept) floors. it were funny.  we were so desperate for those super hard homeworks:D  our exams had curve systems so even if you ddnt studied to exams, you could pass the courses with doing homeworks since they also took alot portion of grades. but hmm homeworks were super hard.


i felt as someone did make a wrong joke about quaternions. but being silent :)


why doesnt everybody talk everytime:) there is big times of silence:) but i am still super happy since i found a group of nerd people to talk to:D yayy:D God please someone talk sometopic please:) where everyone has gone:D are there other irc channels? where are my friends? :) ok this is how irc is as i get, there are big moments of big silent durations. I bet these friends are talking in other channels or just coding or just living  life in those big moments of silence? definitely so. but wishing that these channels wer emore active:)


ok my silly classes :) hadnt compiled yet:D

package models.atmosphere
//its not very physical realistic since i am not any expert in these topics:D


//my project-> so i am the boss :D 
case class AtmosphereContent( val concentration:Double, val x:Double,val isCloud:Boolean=False,val is_continental: Boolean=True, val is_urban:Boolean=False) {

  //wavelength is in nano meters:)

  def optical_depth(val wavelength:Double):Double
  def extinction_multiplier(val wavelength:Double): Double = {
    math.exp(-1.0* optical_depth(wavelength)
  }
}
case class TroposphereAreosolOfWater extends   AtmosphereContent {
  def optical_depth(val wavelength:Double):Double =  {
   
       wavelength match {
         case _  =>  {
           if (is_continental){
             0.34
           }else if(is_urban) {
             0.84
           }else {
               0.84
           }
         }
       }
  }
}
 
case class TroposphereAreosolOfDust extends   AtmosphereContent {
  def optical_depth(val wavelength:Double):Double =  {
   
       wavelength match {
         case _  =>  {
           if (is_continental){
             0.00079
           }else if(is_urban) {
             0.00035
           }else {
               0.00035
           }
         }
       }
  }
}
case class TroposphereAreosolOfSoot extends   AtmosphereContent {
  def optical_depth(val wavelength:Double):Double =  {
   
       wavelength match {
         case _  =>  {
           if (is_continental){
             0.0014
           }else if(is_urban) {
             0.0033
           }else {
               0.0033
           }
         }
       }
  }
}

case class StratosphereAreosolOfSulfate extends   AtmosphereContent {
  def optical_depth(val wavelength:Double):Double =  {
   
       wavelength match {
         case _  =>  {
           if (is_continental){
             0.00026
           }else if(is_urban) {
             0.00026
           }else {
               0.00026
           }
         }
       }
  }
}

case class MoleculerContent  extends AtmosphereContent {
  def optical_depth(val wavelength:Double):Double =  {
       wavelength match {
         case 300 => 1.2237
         case 350 => 0.5653 
         case 400 => 0.3641
         case 450 => 0.3641
         case 500 => 0.1452
         case 550 => 0.0984
         case 600 => 0.0690
         case 650 => 0.0690
         case 700 => 0.0369
         case 750 => 0.0369
         case 800 => 0.0215
         case 850 => 0.0215
         case 900 => 0.0134
         case 950 => 0.0134
         case 1000 => 0.0072
       }
      
    }
   
}



trait Atmosphere {

 
 
}





ok by the way iun the chat group, weird topics started to get talked so i gonna leave the group. since scary topics started to talk which is so outof game development. i think they should either ban that person who talks scary/bad topics thats out of game dev topic or i leave the group.  why noone voices a voice against this guy who talks scary topics:S  i wanted to enter a group which talks game development. these people talk non game dev things right now. lets leave the group. since the topic is super scary :S  I left the group because one guy talks super scary topics:S


ok where is a game dev group where people talks just game dev:S one guy spoiled the topic of all irc group:S talks super scary topics:S


of my nerd friends dream went away:S i thought i founda place i could find nerd friends and one guy spoiled the group with talking super psycho/super scary stuff:S

where are nerds internet environments where nerd people like to talk and maniac people dont talk maniac/scary topics:S ?

i thought i found a place where i can find nerd friends and a guy spoiled it with talking maniac/scary topic 2 minutes ago:S

my dream of setting up a nerd friend group all went away since a maniac spoiled the chatgroup with talking maniac/super scary topics:S

:S
so now, where would i find nerd friends:SSSSSSSSSSSSSSanyway, i wish i could have many nerd friends one day in future. but visibly i wont find any nerd friendset from irc. cause as alike this, a maniac can spoil the chatgroup with talking super scary/maniac topics.


i would check the group later on for to see if they banned that account. i would return back to the group only if they ban that account which talks super maniac/super scary things.


i felt lesser alone thinking i found nerd possible future friends last hours. but then a guy spoiled it with talking very super scary/super maniac topics 5 minutes ago:SSSS so finding nerd friends from irc failed. i entered irc and left in 2 hours due to super scary talk i saw 10 minutes ago:S



ok so coding lone again:S

(where could i find nerd game dev friends:S whom would make jokes to me and i would make jokes also to:S)

(where do game devs hang around in internet? (other than irc which seemed a risky place since a maniac person told super maniac/super scary things there) where can i find game dev friends:S)



(so coding alone again:SSSSSSSS)


i watched thief game's credits song (which shows a video of game producers) that i last watched when i were in high school and which wanted me to make games in future:) that video still looks cool after nearly 19 years:))I had a compaq notebook (that my brother gifted me) and spend my time playing halflife and thief:) and also liked listening metallica burn album:) :D and also rammstein. :D i dont like those albums now i dont know why. those were walkman times:DDDD there were no such digital mp3 players yet:D

and further years, in university  there were only netscape in first year, and there were no google either in first years. we had sun workstations in 3rd floor lab with very cool keyboards that created nice voice when you use. all labs wre either fedora or debian or sun workstation or some kde based linux i dont remember (aha it might be red hat:) ) i dont remember how many nights i fell asleep on chairs in lab:D (homeworks were super fun) if i passed any cours eit must be due to homeworks portion in grades:)


i missed coder friends:) where do game devs hang around in internet? (other than irc? irc looks like a risky place:S)


(ok so coding alone again :'(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( )

maybe slack? lets find search slack groups for game dev topic.


yayyyyyyyyyyy :D i found:) (why i hadnt checked slack:S)
but dont know if i get invited. lets see.



hey i am in indie game developers group as: (guhuu name:))
https://igd.io/members/guhuu/


ok lets continue coding:)i feel super sleepy but i cant sleep either:) i dnt know how many hours i slept today. maybe 5 hours or more or less i dnt know. but i were broken many times. so i feel super sleepy.

ok so coding alone again:SSSSSSSSSSSSSSs its shitty to code alone:S i wish people hadnt spoiled irc gamedev channel by talking super maniac/super scary topics. so i learnt that irc channels are risky. i mean super maniac people could talk super maniac/super levels of scary things there:S it were super levels of scary thing i read there:S


i were happy i found possible stranger friends whom makes jokes of quaternions or alike game topics. then a person there talked about super maniac/super scary things so i instantly left the group. so i concluded irc is risky since stranger people could talk super scary/super maniac topics there.

now i entered a slack channel i found and registered to one and waiting invite to.seems as there is not a alot slack based game dev channels:S i ddnt liked the name of the channel i entered. and the other one i liked its name. the one i wait invitation to is indie gamedev slack channel.

i need energy. or i wish i could sleep and so i could continue with higher energy. but i cant sleep. ok.lets open some fun super fun techno music type. wish it brings energy to coding.



yeppp: agenda: srtm reader to read equirectangular projection based jpeg data (SRTM format) to map continents and non continent places since i have a paper which shows aerosol concentration for such places so that optical depth values i calculate it more correctly. though my mie calculations arent any ok. nor i had currently taken in to account the mie's phase function (thats more directional)  i looked to solution of mie's equations and saw legendre polynomials and also recurrence equations and some solution papers to that equations for different wavelegnths. so i said lets give up mie scattering thing's inner details but just use the precalculated great values from paper. so i wont have radiance values or black body radiation constanlty clculated (i mean it wont be a physical realistic system) i would just paint with values from papers and stop at realistical looking one skies. mie equations additions to be expected to be added in future not now. it were silly dissappointment, seeing recurrence equations in mie and legendre polynomials:D and mean square error based approximations to solutions of different wavelenght values. i said forget currently these nasty calculations temporarily (wiener functions/bessel functions etc...) and directly paint without taking in to account the phase function and paint non intellgntly but with trial and error (of course paper's values are correct. but i mean i dont take t he direction of light in to account, of the scattered light nicely). i am at exciting points in project of sky rendering but i am too sleepy:S i wish i could had slept a hour and it would fill me with much more energy. i lack my normal energy level. sleep deprivation  .like the day before last night i also hadnt slept. 2 days of sleep disorder:S if i could just sleep a hour. it would create enough energy for to return to my brain hormones super energetic state as usual:) (whilst i am working on an exciting project i am super energetic state. i am actually normally more excited person than other people. cause i heard this from lots of people. includiong my psycholog said i have mroe serotonin. and other people usually said , like in sculpturing course(1 time course, we tried buddha sculpture) the people said, why are you so excited, i said i dont feel any excited and i ddnt felt. when i am doing an exciting task i like, i am super excited i think. after 2 days of sleep deprivation, i lack such state whilst i am at an exciting state at my project. i feel so much sleepy right now.last 2 days, i couldnt sleep in night time, 2 days ago i slept at 5am. last day i think at 7am. my sleep cycle is broken. i need a hour sleep right now so bad.
aha lets watch a tv show i know i always sleep wqi th that show so my sleep might come and i might sleep 2 hours. yepp:) nice:)(i slept at least 5 hours today i think. but its just disordered sleep and it were continously broken. so this guhu needs some sleep! :D  )



ok i couldnt sleep. but still my energy level came back:)


awhilst the impersonator sociopath (whom impersonates both me and some other person)'s perpetuator impersonates me as a gay aga. ok this is as told 7th character i am impersonated as. i have got a sociopath stalker named mert whom impersonates me with multi names/multi characters. and not only i am, people from my blog also sometimes got victim of impersonation. yeah.  so better i never talk anyone in this blog cause i ahve got a sociopath stalker named mert who has a very creative sociopathy talent of creating characters/assigning new names/impersonating names. this thing i confront never ever ends. i am not gay nor not any aga. I am a computer engineer. but this is the 7th or 8th character the sociopath stalker mert assigns to me whilst stalking me. constant impersonation/constant names/characters assigning. never ends. ok but as told i have a plan. i would create my game and my game would save me.   right 10 minutes ago again wondered around our home's district the impersonator's perpetuator. also impersonates a foreign name. takes any topic from my blog to blend/create new characters/new names/new labels. i have got a mentally ill sociopath stalker named mert. anyway, stressing to it wont fix this situation. as told my game would save me. i would buy a cute house in Alaska with a huge garden or a mini island. and create parties and all wanna be friends are invited. (specifically game dev friends:) and also people that are not game devs also of course. i like friends:) not only specific to game devs:) )


ok now i have energy to continue coding since i watched a funny show. i have lots of tasks remaining still to do a huge set of tasks in both big data side andin frontend side. so lets take on steel like nerves i mean super dexterity mode kind of narrative. whilst i get stalked with impersonation around my house, i should repat inner in myself a narrative about having super dexterity steel like nerves. yeppp some inner rituel that protects me from ptsd whilst i confront sociopathy of sociopath mert named stalker. this guy's 7th or  8th new character about me is a gay woman .i am not gay nor never been. but  that gay side doestn makes me upset. what makes me upset/disturbed is the impersonation act. constant impersonation act. like mandelbrot thing, this universes/characters this sociopath stalker mert creates never ends. i need to have steel like nerves. and not stress whilst stalk incidents happens. and as told also impersonates a foreign name. anyway. anyway. lets code the game. lets think/dream of future life that stalk incidents wont happen:)

ok how could i break the delusionary world of this sociopath ? i could find a bf? a game dev bf? but there is no such person in this city right. so thats not any a solution. but i wish hmm in future i wish i could find a game dev thats ugly as me and a game dev and protects me from mert's sociopathy/stalk.  (ok so i want a game dev bf visibly if i would have a bf:P) (we could code games together, it wuodl be fun:) )

(i wish there existed another game dev in this city:P ) so that i would be instantly saved from stalk. so that the bf would shout to stalker when the stalker tries to stalk me with sociopathy. yeah. but i dont think there are other game devs in this city? are there?

ok so for having a bf thign: i should lose weight, look more charismatic:) hmm would try to do so alike:) if i had a bf, would have protected me from sociopath stalker.  but i dont think there are game developers in  this city rig ht?(since game devs like to live in big cities , and this is  a kind of smaller city)  so not possible to find bf here.  so instead i should have steel like nerves whilst. whilst i have no bf that protects me from sociopath mert's stalk.

how fun it would have been to have a nerd game dev bf:) i think it would be fun since we would talk about same topics:) or i dont know. i like game development topic alot, so i infer thats why i also like my bf to be a game dev? :) :D ok maybe i find from the messaging groups. but irc i cant enter since i saw its a risky place. hmm anyway as i stay in games industry, maybe some we meet up with sopme game dev in some time in future? who knows what my fate would be like. ok whilst having a bf is not applicable right nwo (since there ar eno game devs in this city)  instead lets have hold steel like nerves. yepp.

i think i want to have a bf in my life that protects me and is from game dev side.  a developer like me. coder. hmm i would want him to be tall whilst i am not any betlfl:D ok lets get thinner and try to look cooler to find such tall game dev bf in future:P so. if i find such bf, me and my bf would create parties in new place we would live and create parties then (eg.. buying a cute home in alaska or a mini island:) together etc.  ). so in the future goals stack, findingf a game dev bf is also added:P so i am not alone or dont feel alone and there is some protecting person me from sociopath mert's stalk. yeppp.
lets turn to a charismatic old thin developer  and find such old tall game dev bf:P  it got added to agenda. since i think it would be nice to have a bf in life:)
a silly stupid sentence comes now: ok if i find a game dev bf, we might have also game dev kids:D it would have been super fun to have a bf that we create projects together:) so to have a bf, lets get back thin again. maybe repeat rhinplasty:P  lets try to look as a more charismatic lady. yepp. finding a bf, adn living together in Alasika seemed as a super fun idea now:) or we could lvied in the city life also, since this bf would protect me from sociopath stalkers yepp.  ok so in to things to accomplish task, finding a game dev bf is added:P :) it would be fun to have a coder bf for sure:) since we might together work on projects. i think it would be nice:) ok, one thing for sure, finding a bf and living together in Alaska looks as a quite nice thing to do:) but how and where i could find bf:D that part unknown. tinder? no i am not that type of person that likes to use such platforms. hmm i think i might find my bf from game dev communities:P


so lets hold steel like nerves whilst i confront sociopathy and whilst i have no bf protecting me. and lets find a bf from game dev side and live together, i think i feel fatigue to living alone setting:P i want some helping person in life to my life's problems and me also would help him and some life friend i mean, also some jokes doing person and me would also make fun of. yeah. this looks as a nice thing to do in life. find a bf and live together thingy. but the bf should be a game dev for sure:P and should be ta ll sure:P (since this guhu hobbit has height complex:P) it instantly felt super fun.


ok so entering super diet state tomorrow. and would might add a rhinoplasty thing to get cuter? i dnt know. wht to do else? i should try to look as a charismatic mysterious cool lady? yepp. would try to look as alike:)

ok lets continue coding game and hanging around in game dev environments/places:P may i find a life friend from there:P  (i like game dev topic that much that i would like my bf to be also a game dev. i forgot how muych i like game dev whilst in years. turns out as i return to game dev topic, its my fav development area:) so that i would like  my bf from game dev area:P )          (if i find a game dev bf, we could work together:) and our kids might be also game devs:DDDDDDDDD   it would be funny if happens like that:DDDDDDD)

oik nope finding bf postponed to future conference events. not from game messagign groups for sure. since business and relations is completely differnt discourses    ok i might find bf from game dev conferences maybe:) but definitely not from message groups. cause business and relations is strictly separate discourses. hmm so i wish i find bf from game dev socialization events in cit y i would live in future. or from conference events? that i get learn new people? and someone gets interested? like way i want to find bf. cause message groups arent any place to find bf. so  bf finding is left to life i mean in life, in somepoint in time, i would meet someone either its in a conference or its a social event. but its definitely not any game related message groups. cause business and relations are completely super separate discourses:) yeppp ok i decided i want a bf in life, but that shouldnt need to be game dev also. and would be someone decided by life/fate. i mean,  i guess i would meet up my future bf in some social  event or in a conference or such social things.  but definitely not now. and for sure not any from my game dev network.   since i would ne twork to create  business not to find bf:D relationships and b usiness are separate discourses. as fourht ly repeated.

ok so bf findin g task postponed to future time  in life wher ei wld  attend social events or conferences or holiday things. dont know where i would meet the one:D but its definitely not from my game dev network. since fifth time, business and relations are strictly separate universes/discourses.ok i erase finding a bf task from goals stack and focus in game building things. and finding bf would be something thats happens unplannedly. maybe i would meet him in a conference or social event or holiday. but it wouldnt be from my game dev community i would enter. cause business & relationships, hmm nothing to mix:) i mean they should always stay separated/as non merged separate discourses. i wonder whom my bf would be:D i would most possibly meet him either in a conference or social event (e.g. friend's friend kind of thing:P ?) or holiday thing. but not any from my game dev network. cause  business and relationships should forever stay as separate discourses. yepp:)
ok my bf wouldnt be any game dev. but would be a developer like me for sure:) or not. i dont know. i think such topics are fate's things. i think i would meet the one either in a holiday or a conference or social event etc.  but woudlnt eb from game dev community.

yepp lets return back to my srtm reading task and scattering lightwaves extinction takss to color the sky and also c loud rendering task at many high kms in sky. lets see. how it would end up. tons of tasks to do. but i chosen this game dev. project and one thing  for sure, i should work harder. being lazy and this domain doesnt any work together. should work harder, yepp lets study till morning.

coming back to finding a nice jpeg reader in scala or java:)

i dont know if this data is open data:ddnt understood from the notes. wish its open data:) cause like to use in scattering trials.
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Srtm_ramp2.world.21600x10800.jpg



nice ways: ( not that i am doign creating cubemap, but i were checking if i understood equirectangular projection correctly:) )
http://paul-reed.co.uk/programming.html

i wonder if i should currently use a gis library yet. can read jpeg srtm image to convert hegihtmap to spherical coordinates and use in scattering calculations.
yepp so recently not needing to integrate apache sis project



ok even if its an amazing composition and tha ti am listening right now, wish it had different title (listenin gnow: Yanni, one man's dream) (i wish whilst being an amazing composition, i wish it had different title:)(its sexist :P) ) (we all have dreams, mine is creating this tons of tasks holdign game first :) )

that sounds funny:P to have tons of tasks:) i mean its a big challenge to me, this game's tasks:) and funny since its dramatically too many tasks existing in pile to get accomplished. i mean  funny since its also little bit desperate:) but i know i would accomplish. just need to get more productive. luckily i stopped being lazy and continued in  atmosphere rendering task which would take lots time. but there is even after that tons of tasks. that part looks both fun and both makes me feel its funny to target  this much of tasks :D

thinking  tons of tasks to do, it feels funny (since there is despair of lots of things to do beside being fun since its games). i mean i should work hard whilst i were  alazy person that part feels   kind of fun and funny :) or i dont know what exactly feels funny to me. m aybe creatin g such hard project as a goal.i dont why what feels funny. i think its due to my previous developer friends joke/sarcastic talks. we found it funny and made joke alot when we have to work overtime or when there is a super hard task to do. so i later on when there is such condition in life, like there is tons of tasks to do, find it funny due to my previous colleagues which i liked to work alot wit h in some company in some place.whenever one had to do alot  tasks he and we all made fun of it. we were such silly developers. that made used sarcastic talk alot in our daily tasks. that stayed me in my further worklife in my personal projects. when there is despair (of tons of works to do) ,i find it also funny:D making fun of self became a persistent b ehavior due to those colleagues and i am grat eful for that otherwise tons of tasks would nt be easy to handle.


when  i know my coding quality is shitty right now but when i dont care that much since its easy to change that part later on . .but demo is the urgent thing. i think CAKE pattern /more dependency injection is necessary to this code and also some builder patterns but right now priority is to reach a  working demo state asap


its shitty to have no friends whilst coding:SSSSSSSSSS everytime i figure out this situation. i wish i had friends joking to me right now.  


ok i am inside some game topic discussion places yapppp:) : (discord, gamer-assembly group)
https://tinyurl.com/gamer-assembly

and also loveforgames.slack.com :)
yayyy y i found places to talk since its super unnice to work all alone with no people talking any joke or any topic:SSSS


ok i had no idea  a system like discord app existed :) (ok today i felt super ignorant cause i newly learnt about PAX also :) )
and  in discord i wrongly connected to voice server and figured out early :) quite new to discord thing also. ahh i felt super levels of ignorant as i am ignorant:)

ok at least i am inside two chat groups, feeling more social. why the heck i ddnt did that  before:)   ok the necessary parts are hmm wavelenght to color conversion things and light flux transfer (not physically realistic, up t o some little tiny level pyshical realistic)  modeling part to color up spherical coordinate based 2d texture with light extinciton remains. for that, i need to also integrate srtm heightmap data things and urban locations data.  and but would so integrate the java based jpeg reader were it jai or else. yeah it were jai i think, then the light path scattering according to sun's position and light direction and all the flux's extinction topics etc are remaning to be done. b ut atleast hmm some part of its base utility classes is ready. now last utility class would be srtm reader. then would model the sky colors and check with shader tromorrow. hmm then would add the spherical harmonics based diffuse lightening  happening clouds in atmosphere.  lets code the jai implementation and sleep cause i really need to sleep and wake early tomorrow so that i dont have disordered sleep cycle.
or lets sleep even now without adding jai integration to srtm reading thing. cause i feel sleepy and its a good thing. since if i sleep now i could wake up early tomorrow yeppp.



ok day started with a stalk incident.  a woman shouted outside  (mert name sociopath's 8 or alike character he crafts) that she is gy (i respect gays) but she impersonated a foreign name shouted a differnt foreign name. so as told, its super risky to have written any names any people in my public blogs cause it becomes gets impersonated.she also shouted the label thats crafted(3rd label as told, there ar e impersonated 7 or 8 names with labels). and so this is the report of today's event. mert name person articulates these people to craft many characters and stalks like me  like this for 3 years. and also, i wish i never had written any name in my public blogs cause those names also got impersonated/impersonated as today shouting incident as i confronted. i saw many times impersonation of me and people i mentioned in my public blog before.constant character creation, constant label creation, constant high vicinity stalk with shoutings. and the foreign name impersonation(this time diff name) is also very unnice since i wish i never mentioned such names so that these people steal identity of in character creation/labels/characters etc. this today shouting happent 10 minutes ago or alike from home's little bit far vicinity.whilst i c onstantly get impersonated, this time a foreign name also got impersonated and his name useed in shouting with being impersonated. constant characters creation/labels creation/constant fantasy worlds creation. i have got a mert named sociopath stalker t hat articulates people like this in this stalk. and in this 7th character i am impersonated as a gay woman. i am not gay as told. and i like alot gay people by the way. its just impersonation th ing i dont like any. its super disturbing, this constant impersonation/high vicinity stalk for 3 years and constant shoutings and constant mostly unnice labels creations etc. this mert name impersonates me with many names and this time as a gay woman i am impersonated. this th ing happens for 3 years like this. anyway.so today's incident is as: 15 minutes ago, a woman shouted sociopathic (created by mert named socio) sentences outside near home's vicinity. and also impersonated a foreign name whilst doing that also. a foreign man  name she impersonated someone else. these people in this 7 or 8 characters assigning thin gs, tthey do this assigning names to other people, like giving a foreign man'[s name to one local person and c allin g him like that in ths fantasy world creation/character creation. so t he forieign name shouted is not real person, its another character in this character creation act that is applied to me and to situaitons i mentioned in my public blog before. a constant impersonation act is applied for 3 years, constantly , with a very high vicinity stalk. i am impersonated, foreign people get impersonated(as 15 minutes ago shouted foreign name(thats differnt), might had even called me with such man name). constantly this act happens. with a very high viciinity stalk beside. the woman shouted things outside 15 minutes ago. some impersonation effort in going on. and also shouted some foreuign name thats also being impersonated. so people if yu hear the foreign name dont  believe its not him (this t ime a diff foreign name), its impersonation. like in this 7th character devised for me, other people get also get impersonated. like that foreign name. and also woman shouted sentences and labels i heard in stalk. so this woman who shouted that impersonating setnecens is an articulated person  in  this stalk mert named sociopath crafts. i mean dont believe when thse people shout such sentences outside. they are doing  impersonation/character creation/fantasy worlds creation that are devised by sociopath mert named stalker.this stalk happens like this for 3 years and also with ork/oluk/fukara shoutings beside this impersonation things i confront/monitor.this stalk happens like this for 3 years. i scared going outside last year due to scary sociopathy i saw (character creation/impersonation of me specifically and sometimes also other people that are taken from  my previous public blogs. i wish i never holded any public blog in any environment ever:S)  as told i have an agenda to save myself from this neverending 3 years of stalk. would continue my game and make it a populer indie game. and buy a cute home in Alaska with a huge garden and create parties and invite all wannabe friends. this is so insane i know. this things i tell. but sometimes insane things happens. i have got a sociopath mert named stalker and likes to impersonate me with 7 or 8 characters and labels. i know this looks insane to blog readers(it looks like a situation that cant happen in  real life right?)|. but its real. and happens for 3 years like this. the impersonated names i confronted are many many, may i list: its hande, tugra, ada, olga, ege, serra(not any related to my cousin(my cousin is a very btfl very kind  very nice super good person, she is not any related to this stalk i confront, its a common name here so randomly selected character name),  a foreighn man name thats shouted 15 minutes ago, some other names, and 3 labels i heard :S constant impersonation constant ork/oluk/fukara shou tings witth this also character creation thing name/labels creation thing. i know it looks insane to blog readers but really happens this impersonation/stalk i write. anyway. i am super happy internet exists so that i can at least fight against this sociopathy i confront from internet. and i know i would be saved from this sociopathy in fut ure:) my game would save me:) and i would have friends lots of friends, game dev friends (as visible i like game dev friends super alot:)), developer friends, and non game dev nor non developer friends also. i would have lots of both t echie and nontechie friends.

ok i am suepr happy i am in an indie game developers group in discord :) yayyyy i have nerd friedns like me:)))))))))))))

ok lets continue in coding game agenda:) yayyyy:) guhu is super happy for finding an indie game develpoer community:)))))))) its super duper happy:)))))))))))))))) there are famous game developers sharing their games there:) i am inside a game dev community yayyyyyyyy:))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) super duper happy state:) lots of serotonin  creating state:))))))))))))))))) i instantlty find game dev friends via entering a message board:) it feels super dope levels of cool:))))))))))))


guhu's life dreams: finding a cute home in Alaska with a huge garden, fiunding a developer bf :) and creating a family maybe. or not. dont know if i would have kids. my kids time might end  before being able to create a familyxD. anyway. my dream state of life is currently like this:) in life side this is like that.

in projects side: as told it starts with building  the game.


lets add fun task of srtm reading and integrating that data to the geoid and atmosphere so that light scattering gets calculated accordingly  to continental background oceanic background.a nd also  lets make later heightmaps from this low resolution data yepp.      first and first JAI integraiton to the project. todays tasks are super fun. i would pass the beams of fflux around atmosphere layers simulating extinction of wavelengths  of equilly distrubuted flux of both wavelengths and create a dummy fragment /vertex shader  to paint to see what gets created:)

ok lets code these things and read more cause i figure out i became alot dumb in some topics whilst i dont read anythign. i wernt like this 3 years ago. i were reading alot 3 years ago. anyway. lets read more and be lesser ignorant person. the very most important one goal. as reading nonignorant texts reminds me what things i liked to read 3 years ago. all went away whilst i confronted trauma of stalk and went in to super stress mode (with constant stress existence in my mind since whilst confronting sociopathy). but just said, would read more. yepp. but first and first i need to save my life from stalk of sociopath mert. so that i have time to read more and have lesser daily stress level since there would no stalk existing so life would be normal again  out of confronting sociopathy /stalk. so i would resume to my  curious version who reads again. and along i had learnt things in other sides  in 3 years like maths/science topics little bit.  ok as soon as i have a peaceful life (that i save my life from sociopathy of mert named sociopath stalker (character creator)) i would resume reading. being lesser ignorant person is one other life goal:) everything gonna be a perfect life:)   i would be a lesser ignorant person (who reads more) and also i would live in a peac eful life setting (away from sociop[ath mert's stalk/sociopathy).

i ma happy i learnt more about science in these 3 years. for instance whilst studying quantum theory i came pon de broglie's constants. but then i also in some other parts came upon in projects learnt about spherical harmonics represeantion thats initiatlluy devised for quantum mechnics. and in light equations i came to electro magnetism theory boundaries. so lots of boundaries i saw. that i wuold read/learn more in future. so i mean 3 years ahdnt passed with sole learning nothing like perido even if it were super hard 3 years to me:) i mean whilst life is in trouble with confronting sociopath of a mert named sociopath, whilst trauma exists, also life hadnt passed doing nothing but learnt little bit from  there little bvit from other topics. but topics i liked to read about (like humanities) i couldnt i couldnt spare time  since i were always focused on trying to create projects. so i liked that i just onluy hadnt behaved in trauma with learning nothing but learnt little bit from there ltitle bit from other areas and have lots of things to learn as i o bserve as seen. as told i want to understand quantum computers/quantum theory and electro magnetism since it all came interesting and also want to study more humanities that devises reality along with these areas. but as told, in alst 3 years, i couldnt studied the humanities side since i were in trauma. ubt as told, everything  gonna be fine again in future:) so thin gs to learn in my stack (that i came to boundaries of: special relativity / electromagnetism / quantum mechanics ) and of course one thing left unread for 3 years humanities areas. as i have a peaceful life (that i save myself from mert named sociopath's sociopathy holding stalk) i would have time for all:) and would work with onder bro to create proijects in future as told. but first need to buy a peaceful Alaska home for that that i save myself from socio mert's socio stalk. so saving self  starts with building the game.  i figure out one can learn all science built in  world. just need to understand maths deeper. my goal is to understand current mdels of how world works. as told during projects i came boundaries to such knowledge areas constantly. like whilst trying to render sky, i came upto electromagnetism's boundaries, whilst modeling other things i came up to other boundaries. so whilst i am sad trauma stole my peace from my life last 3 years, also happy i hadnt spent it all empty but learnt little bit info from one area and little bit from others.    i mean it hadnt passed with all learnin gnothgin and forgetting all known or losing brain cells due to traum a stress state. it hadnt fully passed like that:P  so future would be much better for me. and would learn much more things.  but to do that, first i should save myself from socio mert's socio stalk. and game is the enabler to that:) lets code:) so game's 50% percentage would belong to onder bro. and remaning shared by me and ece named cousin. I am happy for my progress in learning more science. but have to learn more  of basics of how universe works for instance (particle physics/Electro magnetism/quantum theory/special relativity...) in future. since i wish i know. eg, if i know i can construct better simulations. as targeting simulations of life in future. for genetic engineering side. ok this is goals for long term studies for future years. so have differnt many goals for future life. d ont know hwihc ones i could establish which ones i cant.so goals set. some easy/some hard. easier one is game. harder ones are learning how universe works in detail:P

ok for life side: i sef up a goal of setting up a family buying a cute Alask ahome with a huge garden and creating of a family if sme developer i meetup tht  loves m e and if time hasnt passed alot (so that i could still have kids)  ok if i could find a bf or not, some goal i would defntly try to establish would be buying a cute home in Alaska with a huge garden for sure:))(i defntly wish i find a bf also in future:) hmm i would have wnted a developer bf:)) (so that we resemble each other) how i wish i already now had a bf whom  protects me from the sociopath mert's stalk. maybe i cld fnd a bf and travel around city so stalker sociopath mert gives up stalking? but where i can find bf here?the socio mert and his articulated poeple come shout sociopathic sentences with imerpsonation besid emy house at dffrnt days/hours.as told the 7th or 8th character i am impersonated is as a gay woman, i am impersonated as gay:D whilst i am not any gay nor any the label shouted. and the woman shouted a man's name in  mostning. mostly thats the foreign man  name being shouted to me.  so thats my new name?the 9th name?. ok, i wish i had a bf for sure. mert creates 8 or 9 characters and makes me get stalk with articulating people like this. i know it feels unbelievable or insane story. but it is really like this. where i know that foreign name is shouted to me, cause i remem bered one other stalk incident 1 year ago, "she is **** (some  foreign name)." kind of incident. and she mentioned other names that are impersonations in stalk incidents i confronted. so she most possibly shouted that foreign name shouting to me in morning. as if anyone heard some foreign man name shouted, it were shouted to me, impersonatin g me with a gay woman with a man's name. this is the 8th or 9th character being impresonated for me. i counted 8 or 9 names and/or labels in all these impersonation things i see. and constan t "ork" "oluk" "fukara" "ac(means poor)" shoutings.so n many names fantasies created with assigning  me also bad/in teresting roles and lots of differnt names. i know this looks as an insane story to blog readers but really happens like this. i am  stalked like this for lsat 3 years. constant ork shoutings/contant impersonation  /constant character/label creation. constant fantasy worlds creation. for 3 years, this stalk happens like this. in morning  the lady thats articulated by mert named sociopath shouted some foreign name an d i remembered 1 years ago stalk sentecne and figured otu, she calls me that foreign guy's name she shouted morning to me. and also said other names that is repeated in stalk inciden ts constantly. so this gay woman character with that foreign man name impersonation is the 8th or 9th character i am assigned and stalked with. and constant "ork" "fukara(means super poor)" "oluk(means hole or sink)" "ac(means hungry)" shoutings whilst during this stalk for 3 years constantly. constant imerpsonation of many delusional names/labels/and those curse shoutings beside. i have got a sociopath stalker named mert. likes to create n many characters for guhu and stalk her like that.constant labels/ names creation (one label is aga as i get?) constant fantasy worlds creation alike. and constant names and characters. it never ends. this stalk with this impersonation type wuith this sociopath acts with this fantasy world creations and stalking along with such fantasy worlds never ends. for 3 years.i wish i had a bf whom protects me from socioapth stalk i confront last 3 years. where can i find any bf? i wish i find some bf.   now or in future. but i wish i dfntly need/wnt a bf in my life.  but i do think for that i need to get thinner like i were before(since i look nicer when i am thin). yepp so going to eat nothing in  this night. ok whilst i dont go outside how to find bf? i think findinf bf is possible only when i go to holidays/conferences/social events .  yepp so i need to not care the stalk when happens (whn sociopathy sentences' shoutings happens beside my home/impersonation stuff)  and forget finding a bf now. cause where, i mean its currently impssble to find any bf with this state of life where i dnt go even outside alot (i spend most time infront of computer either blogging about my trauma about stalk i confront or coding the game) ok lets continue coding game and lets not care when stalk happens (but its not any easy to "not care". ) lets gets lost in coding game and try to reach state of "not caring" state when sociopathic shouting/stalk happens beside my house.yepp lets do the best i can in not caring when confronting severe form of sociopathy:S  i wish i had a bf :S so that would protect me from stalk adn tje sociopathy of character creation acts and labels and roles creations. n many fantasy worlds get created and i am stalked alike with that. lets try to "not care" as if not caring is ever possible when confronting sociopathy with high vicinity stalk and cnfrointing constant impersonation acts .ok lets gets lost in coding game instead of getting lost in trauma:) i know the thin g i tell becomes unbelievable to blog readers. but onethin gi understood in life, is if you stay weak, for instance when if some person shouts you ork, and if you just go away from the stalk words incident without replying (i scare so i go away usually) this would create  image of you being super weak and the stalk would continue in worsened form with worser impersonation acts/sociopathy only because i never could defend myself against these sociopathy i confront, cause when this sociopathy acts happen, my first act is leavin g the place where it happesn. i mean this made me most possibly  look like a dumb to them so they persist this sociopathy/impersonation acts sicne they never get reaction to sociopathy they appl y (i just always scare and run away silently when stalk happens).  so i figure out this insane things i confront is rooting from me looking like a super weak person which makes them think they could do anything like even impersonating me with different names. i mean when the victim cant protect her self cant defend herself, the stalk persists in worse/more worse impersonations as i observe. i mean i know this looks unbelievable to you blog readers. but i do think only bullied children would understand this adult times bullying form with bullyign  with impersonat ion/curse/high vicinity stalk. i mean if you look weak, bullying never ends and it also gets worser. i just look weak to my bulliers(sociopath mert named stalker) so thats why as i get it persists of 3 years. thin king they found a super stupid vicrtim to bully/stalk with sociopathy  i infer thats their motive. for this never ending stalk. since when they stalk me outside, i never reply and silently run away from place. so this must made me look super stupid that they just continue this  in worser ways, maybe to pass time, to entertain themselves maybe i dont know but i do think whats goin g on is this. i know this looks unbelivable thing but really happens. anyway lets continue the game and be saved from sociopathy/stalk asap with buying a cute home with a huge garden in Alaska and then in holidays or conferenmces or social events lets find a bf, then set up a family  etc. my 3 years might be stressful but future would be very happy:) yeppp.  


so is this like this? when you have had an uglier type of nose, and you would be named as ork and then for 3 years stalked in worse ways like this? sometimes i think stupid people are very stupid. for trying to discriminate people on how they look (whilst i had a not super nice looking noise) then whil;st i never replied to them, impersonations started worse form of bullying and even character creations. as if i look different, i created a big hatred in these stupid people. and the normal hatred thing since i look different evolved to worser forms like creating multi characters/trying to impersonate/ stalk in high vicinity.   this is what could happen in life when you only have had an ugly nose tht might look good & bad at dffrnt angles.  this is the evolutions's current level. i wish transhumanists fix and makes better humans in future. that stupid people like this get more civil, so that people have designed babies with better genes that whom dont hate others only because of their appearance.then that hatred turned to worse forms like stalk with impersonation/multi character assigning. you become a constant entertaintment entity to them that they even create characters/labels/names to you. all started since you had an ugly nose and they felt hatred against to you and scape goated you with ork shoutings and impersonation then.  now my nose is better. but the thing the nightmare i confront never ends. the stalk worsened with creating impersonation/creating multi characters/multi labels. it looks like a group of psychos gets entertaintment from messing with me, it started with ork. then evolves to character creation/multi labels assignments as i report. the fun of psychopath never ends as i observe in  psycho people's acts. i mean they like having some dope from disturbin g the scapegoat they chose.i mean it starts with messing with teh scapegoat since scape goat had an ugly nose due to a bad rhinoplasty op. then they never forget the taste of messing a person with m essing her with psychopathy and it evolved in worse ways and persists for 3 years like this. so dealing with psychopaths for 3 years like this. being a scapegoat of ork label only because i had an ugly nose some years (due to abad rhinoplasty). now its fixed. so if you search for monsters: are they the ones being ork called one due to bad luck due to bad rhinoplasty? or the messing psychopaths? definitely the latter one. being a  monster doesnt come from appearance but from souls/characters/the acts.  now that my nose looks better. but still being called ork since that creates dope in the attacker's mind for since i am the scape goat that he/she loves to mess for to have entertaintment. so the root sociopath stalker mert and his articulated peopleset, that i confront in this s talk, this is my analysis on their behaviors. we wish more designer babies happen so darwinian beings get more civil for ones who scapegoat others because of their looks.and when you look as a nice scapegoat to mess with, since they get dope from doing psychopathy acts, the psychopathy never ends.   so this is what mert named sociopath stalker and his articulated people does. its like getting bullied in school. i am bullied in adult life. from real monsters. or monster like people.why this persists for 3 year, cause i always run away when i get stalked or shouted as ork. i never could had replied to monsters(monsters: the mert named sociopath and his articulated people). except this blog.  this is the only place i could fight back. cause in outside i scare too much.  when stalk happens if i am home, i open music. if i am outside i run from stalk incident's palce fastly.  so only ones with deformed looks sometimes knows that some people are psychopaths that gets fun of making fun of how you look. i had a deformed nose for 4 or 5 years last years. now its better. but it wernt super deformed. but it were enough to become a scapegoat. and since rthey got super fun of messing in psychopathic ways with a scape goat(one thats uglier), they elevated it to having fun with creating delusional characters/labels to her(8 or 9 names) and stalk constantly persists like this for 3 years.  so we wish transhumanists fix this thing of darwinian evolution form thats trapped in such behaviors, wish that future designer babies become more civil people. noncivil peoploe don t exist that much in societys. maybe 1 in 100000? i dont know the ratio, but even1 such person (e.g. sociopath mert nnamed stalker) could turn life hard to other people by his psycho acts. i mean i wsih in future utopias fix this psychopathy traits of human beings. so that they dont scapegoat people looking weaker (e.g. me having an ugly nose some period in life) and as this psychopath gets taste of psychop[ath acts to a scapegoat, the acts elevate4d to worser forms like creating n many characters. n many labels. constant ork/poor shoutings. etc. anyway. life would be super better in future:)  i dont care non civil people's  acts(psycho sociopath mert). i do care that we civil people also exist. luckily we arent like noncivil people. i do thin k maybe there exists 1 in 10000000 psyhopathy ratio in societies? i do think so.seeing psychopath people(just seeing one is enoguh, talking about mert named sociopath psycho stalker and his articulated stalk helpers) made me wanna be a transhumanist. so that people become more civil in future?  i believe in future life becomes same easy to everyone, including people having temporary or long term outlook problems. i had no outlook problem before my first rhinplasty, i had a normal lifted nose then rhinoplasty fucked up my appearance and it looed worser. it sometimes looks good sometimes looked worse. then last 3 years i confront such stalk. then yeah i again had rhinoplasty then it fixed. my nose is normal now. but i might have another rhinoplasty since my nsotrils got bigger due to some side erffect of trauma i confronted and confronting still. ok since i always run away from stalk incidents, this psycho do any type of stalk against me. one label newly crafted is hami. what the fck it means i have none idea. but the newest labels i heard is this and another two labels. the psycho shouted "tell her hami". and one other day psycho shouted "a bond to the ork!(with very hatred on ork word).  hamii". so this is a bond type of label or alike? i dont know? but this horror movie like stalk incidents happens like this. these people are complete freaks/maniacs i think. the mert named sociopath and people that helps him are definitely right aweay from horror movies. i watched trailer of tarantino's  new mo vie about maiden or else. i mean really such maniacs like that family exist in real life. one such type of people are stalking me like that. they call me hunt. one woman shoutedly told "she is my hunt".  they call me ork. or alike all these weird labels. and also i be called shou8ted "fukara", "ork", "oluk"... its like a bunch of manics from horror movies stalk me.  its like that maiden movie where they stalk a target with guns. in my case i am not killed but impersonated/tried to be hunted with impersonation/ork shoutings etc. so my life is little bit like horror movies last 3 years. a bunch of maniacs(a mert named stalker and his helpers) stalk me and i have no idea what to do how to act.You cant define how cruel/maniac insanity is unless confronted. i confront pure form of insanity/psychopathy/sociopathy last 3 years. from a mert named sociopath stalker and his perpetuators.  i mean this things i tell might be unbelivable to yours side. but its real. i know it looks insan e story. but its really real.  ok maybe it were a wrong analogy. since i never replied to socio mert's attention. and he and his friends behaves like those maniacs in horror movies against me. it feels like they find that as a game or alike i dont know what the fuck is going on.  since they shouted me even "hunt".  constant confronting these high vicinity stalk, impersonation/ork/oluk/fukara/ac(hungry) shoutings. i were in seaside, some people shouted "oluk doesnt looks as hungry". they constantly shouted as i am a hungry person:S so these maniacs horror mvoie like freaks tagged me as a hungry person since i dont wear good (whilst i am a computer engineer, i were payed 13000 monthly last year in our local currency in my last workplace) and one their shoutings along this hunt were fukara/ac (means poor/hungry). last day in sea side maybe a weeek ago, they shouted "oluk is not hungry". so this is really like a horror movie:S i am stalked by a bunch of freak/maniac people:S      but as told i would buy a cute home in Alaska with a huge garden so that these freak people cant stalk me ever:S it feels like those trailer i watched about that horror movie the thing i confront. insanity has no limit of cruelty:S i mean  the things an insane person(mert named sociopath) and an his helpers can do is countless/uncommensurable/not quantizable:S
the first ork shouting?  i worked in a company and i dated the guy whom company owner's daughters were in love to ( i slightly dated, he were handsome and showed interest and hsi friedn tried to make us couple so what i could else do). but i dont think this ork shouting is related to her nor this stalk. i do think her and these ork shouters unrelatedly shout ork to me. i m ean it were because of my more defected nose. it looked sometimes good sometimes bad. now its normal. but not super good. but the thing is i got ork due to my nose, since unrelated people shouted ork to me as i observe(but that woman shouted me ork with hatred (the person whom i dated person she is itnerested to, 4 years ago). and last 3 years i got shouted ork from unrelated people. i mean whilst different people shout ork to me, constant is being shouted ork since i had a defected nose. anyway my nose got fixed,  but i wish to add final operation to look better. since my nostrils get worse due to trauma of stalk i confront.is not my blog sometimes tragicomic:D i find these incidents as super comic also by the way and want to laugh ouit loud:) i think those moments trauma is over:) i can heal super quickly. trauma is for sure over. only thing i need to is to buy a cute home in Alaska with a huge garden:) so that these people who like to shout me ork cant ever stalk me. ok these incidents ar e definitely also tragicomic:DDDDDDDDDDDDD today i find them right now this hour find them quite funny:DDDDDDDDDD since whilst i became a computer engineer, never expected an alfred hitckok movie like happenstance thing happen in my life and after trauma of it passes, it even looks tragicomic and funny. since the stupidity of people looks funny. people are super stupid in  wanting to torture others for how ugly their nose looks. this looks now tragicomic. since i mean the stupidity dumbness of people trying to mess with me feels kind of funny:) i mean the thing that, i never get expected ever a stalk in life that i would dream of a hom e with a huge garden:) i never were stalked before in my life. its my first stalk experience:S and its the worst nightmare i ever confronted in  life:S but its also tragicomic:Dmaybe having a very different inner world and confronting super stupid people's sociopathic stalk feels kind of funny:) i mean the absurdness in that is funny:D its definitely 100% absurd:DDD life has no logic:DD i mean just a bunch of psycho sociopaths can fixate you to stalk you with shouting you ork for 3 years and turn your life to nightmare with along stalk. i think that life has no logic part or  the absurdness of the ngihtmare i confront feels funny. that absurdism of that feels super funny:) cause i have nothing related to these stalkers and they stalk me like this for 3 years. i mean life is definitely super levels of absurd and has no logic. :) but anyway i would get stronger against absurdity of life with buying a cute Alaska home with a huge garden:) i mean the lack of logic in people and in life is sometimes tragicomic:) i find these logic absent people and their stalk sometimes super disturbi ng. but at this hour i find it super funny:) sometiems life is absurd, but sometimes logic lacking people is also:) transhumanism is important, designer babies etc. to have more logic so that there is no torture doing sociopaths around. since human nature both creates logical people and both creates non logical people (its the nature of evolution) we wish in very long future, we wuold go over metamrphosis so that no logic/mind absent people torture others with sociopathy. i only seen one such torturerer (named mert a sociopath thats torturing with this way i tell) in  life. but i do think, i wish transhumanists play with our genes so that we dont bound on evolution to be civil beings, i mean, i wish in long future, utopias also play with genes so that no sociopath /no torturerer people exists in new designer babies ages (that future generations of genetically modified people) so that future generations live happier lives:) pain is nonsense. suffering is nonsense. torturerer people lack logic or rationality. the sociopath mert stalker visibly lacks any logic or rationality to hold inner desire to torture a person(guhu) like this. the energy evolution spends is not defined with economy, i mean evolution doesnt pay attention if creates logical or nonlogical human beings that likes to torture others with sociopathy.  i mean evolution works slowly and seemingly sociopathy trait or torturerr people wont go off evolution based created people. so wishfully i8n very logn future, transhumanists modifies genes so noone tortures others with sociopathy  in future generations (talking about designer babies times).

---for my recent talks of transhumanism? :D -> reason is:
i think i became alot fan to writings of a transhumanist person in quora. i never thought i would like writings a full logic person (like aspergers, but definitely not aspergers no definitely not).  but, this is mixture of many domains and i am reading so eagerly. once topic comes to decoherence quantum mechanics and then switches to philosophies from science philosophy to life/meaning of life and various examples/lines from philosophers/scientists/writers. its so beautiul text of pieces. its written  by a person working in neuroethics foundation as i read. i also wanted to be a multi domain person (i loved to read big sociology books 4 years ago) but i am right now super ignorant but as said have goals to be alike in future and would advance much more. but the level i want in quantum passes from knowing e very slittle detail from de broglie to hermittian operations there... or similarly i want such state in electro magnetism. anyway first lets code the game and establish goals one by one:)
yeyyyy  I found my modern times philosopher i like the most:) its that person that transhumanist person  working in neuroethics foundations:)  merges science philosophies with transhumanism topic and consciousness topic.I am   fan of :) i also like to talk about schopenhauer and other philosophers in my daily talks but i do that quite ignorantly:) this person talks very knowledgeably :) I also like to talk about multiverse but doing it very igfnorantly:) so is kind of a person i like to be alike that i inited but stopped whilst i am stalked by sociopath mert named stalker and trauma of it. but future is very promising:) i would wishfully establish goals one by one. (ok not agreeing to some ideas of the philosopher i mentioned. not all articles i liked. i jsut liked some articles. but i liked the multidomain approach quite alot:) i wanted to be like that but couldnt estanblshed any. that philosopher is living my dream:) of that being expert in multidomains and talking like poems from multi domains :) i wanted to be like that 4 years ago. but stopped :P but would resume readin gto be maybe i cant be like that but at least i wish i get lesser ignorant in my daily talks. i am super ignorant. ) for my multi domain expertiser trial i started with sociology then came machine learning then i stopped by quantum mechanics  but stopped.  and also analyzed cultural anthropology:) but currently in a very ignorant position i am since i last time read about sociology 4 years ago similarly dont read alot about philosophy recently nor anthropology. my goal were being multi domain person. though failed whilst i stopped curiosity and switched to running away from stalk&sociopathy mode and trying to protect self from sociopahty mode (of sociopath mert named stalker and his perpetuator friends).   but as t old, gonna establish goals one by one in future. of being a multi domain  person and starting with game thingy and also all other goals.



ok i am hopeful toi life and future, because among 100000 people i saw in life i only saw 1 sociopath psychopath (has a mert name and has sociopath friends whom helps in this stalk incidents ). so i mean maybe i exagerated that transhumanists would solve these things. maybe  i do think, the psychopathy rate is too small to be important to be talked in transhumanism aspect. i dont know, i do think psychopathy rate is too low in  current life. i only saw 1 sociopath/psychopath in entire mylife . (the sociopath that tries to torture me with scapegoating me giving me ork label or many multi characters/labels has mert name)so talking about it in transhumanism aspect is kind of meaningless i think yepp.





ok when i would heal completley and stop talking about this. i think its when i get saved from stalk. i do think it would happen in time. i st ill dont get how i am unlucky this much:S to confront such sociopathy & stalk:S

i just want to stop talking about these. but it  would happen as i get saved from stalk& sociopathy. i think it would happen in time.
but this years, i definitely concluded life is definitely absurd.


hmm away from philosophy:

organizations and people i like in world: i like NASA :) and philosophers, and sociologists and anthropologists and artists and scientists and developers and game devs and all people with kind heart.


I think NASA is the organization i like the most in world and in space:) <3 we love NASA <3 :)

sometimes i feel like some topic coincides with a thing or topic. i saw space nerds topics:) ok is there someone reading my blog from NASA if so, would like to say we love NASA<3  these game dev nerds like NASA and the cool tech that it creates:)

(why i saw nerd topics coinciding:))

dont know if NASA likes game dev nerds:) but we love NASA definitely:) <3


---------------------


ok lets continue coding game. some time i feel so desperate and sometime a coiuncidence i see and want to make me hold on to everything i hold on so strong since i see as weird things happens in life like that makes us desperate:) also good things exists like NASA:) <3


--------------------------


ok NASA has eyes on game dev community? :P  i loved NASA always even when i were a kid:) (i liked reading science publications (bilim teknik publication) and sometimes it talked about discs sent to space or satellites or telescopes sent to space:)) we all love NASA :)


ok i am a game dev side nerd doesnt change that:) (that we are all in love to NASA:) <3)

---------------------------------




 coming to a funny thief coincidence :P : that i saw thief & cars? :) hmm lets clarify thief analogies:P i see game dev of being thiefs since its like no work  but you win money:) since its pure dope to work for games:) i might used other analogies maybe:P lets use magicians analogy ? :)


and thief coincidence? game developers ar e only thiefs of 1 dollars spent to games by game buyers or alike:P for my plan is alike: (I like google alot please dont take as if i am against google company :)  i would host game on gcp first:) for my sentences in below business statement please dont take as if i am any against google. i am not any. i like google alot:) I also like AWS alot but want to learn about GCP since i know AWS but dont know alot GCP ):
tryign to find the executive summary of my game:)






here it is executive summary: i am lagging in plan by the way:)

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1jS2rGksOaSW1qj6krd8xn-_XomGV_NzJ/view?usp=sharing



yeah we game devs arfe thiefs to 1 dollar or alike money spent on entertaintment of game service:)  (i wish my customers pay such 1 or  4 dollars to my game :P ) (if it gets popular):

so thief metaphor is only to that.:D it might be a metaphor to magicianship i think what games do is as? creating illusions of reality that people like to enter ?dont know.  but i liked thief metaphor also  i dont know why:P (for those money games creates:P ok maybe thief analogies is not good. ok. i think magicians is better:P) (trying to be a magician aka game developer:P) i mean since its easily won money, it feels like being a thief:P since i mean its kind of easier tech than ordinary tech like SAAS businesses which involves lots of different domains person-hours costs. like enterprise solutions or others, they are hard techs. but games are like being thief:P you can win money so fastly in games that even looks so unfairso thief analogy were only to that:P since its an easy way of winning capital:P but i were wrong. its not any easy. but i still like to use that analogy in only that perspective i think. as i get deeper in to building a commercial game (i built simulation before but not a commercial game) i confirm its not any easy as i thought.  i used that analogy since it looked from outside as easy money to create as money created easily:P but whilst i work to create a game, it turns out its not any easy money. and i definitely confirm this is pure entertaintment industry. so maybe thief analogies is not any correct. i should create analogies from entertaintment industry. i thin k games is like that.




so thief analogy were because i thought it a quite easy way to create millions out of nowhere:) just by creating a game. so games are both easier than other industries to me (i do thin k it feels like that because the hardwork of it feels lesser hardwork to me since i like games)  and might create easy revenue. instead of a startup taht would need sales people/marketing people and all that managmetn stuff and all cloud costs, games need lesser such capability sets. i dont have experience in sales or marketing or growth of startups. so games seemed as an easier way to create money : ) other ways of startups seemed super hard way. in games i dont need to even setup a big company either:P (since its indie:) )so thief analogy were to that:) i feel like creating money from nowhere:P if i would create:) dont know if i could:) i mean its a startup type (indie games sector) that doesnt need hard experience areas like managemenbt./marketing or very hard sales challenges. or growth challenges. my goal is to be like whatsapp i mean they managed being like that first with just 10 people:) due to super powers of erlang:) and of course with also good software engineering beside (no i dont code my game with superb software engineering  :) i just try to make it work efficient and look good :P ) i mean thief analogy is creating money with less effort:) its just for this projefct, this mindset, for future proejcts i would study alot. i thin k also study alot to game project but it doesnt count to study iun my own eyes since i am in love to games topic:) if you love an area, it doesnt count as work: )i feel like its winning money from no work:D since i feel as non working while i work for games:) but its just for one project. cause i dont like repeating projects i like to change projects. so after game project, i would switch to another sector another area. if ever game project succeeds ever:)



i do like to create metaphors to different topics. sometimes metaphors might be weird like thiefs:)  ok i never get interested in stealing ever. but somehow de veloping a game and winning millions of dollars from that feels like being some kind of thief i dont know why it feels like that. its because maybe game dev feels like non work. it feels like not working:) its pure dope type of work:) i think when you like working on what you work for, it always feels like that:)

but games feels like more like that. cause i before tried targeting ecommerce industry,and saw there are lots of hussles of a big startu p things(ther eis alot competition there and chances that i ever build a business were even tiny). but games is like whatsapp, you can create a big business (of course not big as ecommerce firms but still big) in games with even 2 people:P not even with 10 people:P so that feels like being a thief. when  you can create million dollars with just doing a hobby:P so thief analogy were to that:) i mean its a logical error in the system of market. you just can create million dollars with not that much work like effort spent in other areas. so it feels like being kinf of thief or alike in that not spending not that much effort but winning so  much prize/reward. so i checked all startup types, games felt as the easiest one. i have no experience in marketing nor sales.building an enterprise prdcut at this experience level is not any for me. i cant be any good ceo either. i am not good at hiring people nor managing a company. or not good in marketing or sales. so games is like a magical startup type to me:) you can even create millions with just 2 people. and of course its not any real stealing:) we just steal or in other words get paid for the entertaintment service for 1 dollar or 2 dollars cost for the inside game commerce activities.like buying super cool looking suits or things. or subcription models. or subcription services tied to other game subscription services.  i dont understand why people dont like interesting metaphors:) i am shocked for my metaphor being misunderstood:) so would be careful next time in my metaphor usage:)  ok i change thief metaphor to magician metaphor:) since stealing word is unnice. its not stealin g. i mean the subscription money ior inside ghames commerce money. but due to my thief analogies i anme it stealing but its actually subcription. why i called it being thief? since it needs much lesser effort than other startup types:) since i am not any expert in marketin nor sales nor hiring, this type of startup type which needs less effort feels kind of being a thief whilst i see other startups troubles like growth or hiring etc. i mean i have also growth problem but as told my startup is tempoarary maybe a year, its a massive online game that would stay as its popular. then other startup ideas as told. i mean this type of winnin g money feels easy like the analogous b ad ways (not that i am interested to being any thief:) this looks like b eing a thief i just mean that:)) i mean i dont have to be expert in economy or marketing or sales or hiring or anything  else. its just a 1 or 2 year game. i could utilize my expertise in big data to do customer segmentation or ml things to customers but i dont need to hire people for such  a project. i could hrie part time projects. but as told this is not a long term company creation project. or if anyone wants to contnue it, i would delegate my shares. since i dont like doign same tasks again. and as told i dont have such experience either neither in sch area. i only have experinece in being a developer and in big data and in ml. nothing more.and not interested to learn alot as told. would delegate my responsibilites if such responsibiilites had to be taken:P since they are super hard. for instance grwth of a startup, or marketing/cost balance or hiring people or competition etc. suepr hard topics.

ok wishfully i complete my game in time and establish winning millions in some time later on:) sin ce its stupid to talk like ab ove whilst i hadnt won any milliones ever yet:P yeppp its meaningless to talk like avbove whilst i have no demo yet.

but so lessons learnt, never do a bad analogy/metaphor:) since people might not have silly brain like me that like to do make fun of self in even bad ways:P

so making  fun of self in bad ways is something i should stop. since my joke is misunderstood sometimes? :) like i misunderstand jokes of other people, my jokes are misundersoot also. so better i do lesser jokes :)


why other people can make themselves as anagloies as mafia(some entrepreneurs ?) and i am misunderstood when i make analogies of being thiefs to indie game projects:) since its inherent nature of creating money easily from nowhere instantly in short time:)



ok whilst having created no game yet, i wuoldnt make any analogies of we indie gamers yet ever:)


so my goal is to be like whatsapp:) that creating alot money with not much initial other business efforts :P like creatnig a very popular service with initially just 10 people:) based on super expertise in software engineerin gand super powers of erlang platform:)

i like lazy type of initial startup project, that needs no such big marketing/big sales/big ceo expertise. so indie games are quite perfect for such area:) so reason of making analogies of thief and games is due to that, cause it creates unproportional income to the spetnt effort:P


but i figure out actually what i think as no effort is never no effort. might be years experience. or just an ingenious idea. but i like Capitalism this aspect alot:)

and to the sarcastic genius car company ceo entrepreneur:) ok i get used to your jokes:)  i like funny friends actually:D are you a friend of me:) visibly? since you like to take topics sometimes from this blog:) hello genius and sarcastic friend:) ok this were to the some nice car models readiness to thief things:D ok i get used to yours funny jokes:) hi super genius friend who likes to do jokes to guhu. i get why you like to read my blog. cause i also find my blog funny:) the things i encounter ( impersonation full stalk etc) is it like a comedy movie and i do think you like to read also since tis also like alittle bit comedy movie right:D:P i also laugh to my life:) ok i understood why you like my blog sometimes :) sin ce its funny:) my blog is little bit funny. since troubles i encounter are super funny like comedy movies.(since its too absurd) i also thin k like that:) that my life is funny:D


ok whilst liking game dev friends i also like genius entrepreneur friends with funny jokes:DDD ok i definitely have an interesting life:)  hello funny friend:) i got used to yours jokes:) ok :) my other nerd friends also did alike jokes. why i did not joke doing discriminartion to you i dont know:) it s because i am not used to getting friends other than developer friends:)i am not used to friends from other occupation types. i know i did a "do not do jokes" discrimination type of thing to you because its because i am not used to friends other than my developer friends:) i dont socialized or ddnt socialized with other friend types so i had problems in understanding jokes:) ok now i get used to jokes of you:) never had  a friend of your occupation type:) ok this is new:) i do think we are just internet friends who like to do sarcastic references since we dont talk in daily life. but  i get used to your sarcasm. i remember my nerd developer friends they did worse jokes to me :) and i definitely liked jokes:) ok but sometimes it gets too much sarcastic and i wish you do lesser sarcastic jokes ? :) (e.g. i dont like jokes about my family members:P as expected:P  ) ok i get that you like reading this comedy mvie like blog (i truly find my life as comedy movie since its super absurd:D i do also find it as a comedy movie (e.g. getting stalked by impersonators:D its li8ke comedy movies:D or such torture or confronting such maniac things(like confronting stalkf with socipathy and getting stalked by people who shouts "hunt" to me" whilst being a computer engineer :DDD its super absurd and thats i think super funny due to that. its like hunger games or else:D some people stalk me like as if its hun ger game whilst i am a computer engineer:DDDDDDDDD its super funny:D cause its absurd. its too illogical to happen to me. i just find  this fate of being stalked by such maniacs whom shouts me hunt funny as comedy movies:DDDDDDD since i cant define the absurdity level in that:DDDDD))  any way i get why you like reading my blog and why all other interesting people also like to: )since its like comedy movies:) i do definitely think also like that:) its a movies like life but comedy movies genre:D a sociopath stalks me with shoutiong me "hunt" with impersonating me 10 or else names:DDDDDDDDD whom else happens this:D is nt it also like comedy movies:DDDDDDDDD i do think this fate of mine in being stalked by such sociopaths is super funny:DDDDDDDD and i guess you like to read my blog due to that:DDDDDDDDDDD since this is a different life with a different brain type with various funny troubles:) i guess thats why you like to read and make sarcastic jokes to:D ok i figure out i am like a writer who has lots readers:) but i dont write the stories:D my sociopath stalkers(mert and his helper friends) write the funny stories and i just write about them and its definitely this torture of sociopathy is also kind of comedy movie since its super  absurd and super illogical. i do think this thing i confront is the most absurd thing  i see in life:) the sociopath stalk of mert and his helper friends.this is definitely the most absurd thing  i ever seen in life. being a computer engineer and confronting such sociopathy/stalk with such words.  and since its absurd/so illogical that i find it like a comedy movie also. and i know you also read my blog since its like a comedy movie. and an interesting life. ok who else gets hunted by peaople actually:S the stalkers shout me "hunt" :D and does an impersonationf of 10 or more names/labels.in one character i am characterized as a gay woman and in anopther hande name:DDDDDDD this absurd sociopathy i confront is the most illogical thing i ever observed in life:) and due to that i laugh to it sometiems. sometimes i feel as i am inside in a trauma but sometimes it feels like a comedy movie due to absurdity of it:)  ok i know you read me since my life is funny & absurd:D you like reading funn y people as i observe:) ok i got used to your sarcastic jokes :) i dont know why i did a no jokes to me discrimination to you. i let my developer/coder friends do jokes to me. i dont know why i ddnt let you do jokes to me:) i really dont know. it s because i hadnt socialized ever wth people of yours occuopation. so in summary, i get used to yours sarcastic jokes:) ok:)

ok i wish my life would normalize soon:) that i build my game. and so that i buy a cute home in alaska with a huge garden and for sure i would create parties. and for sure all wnna be friedns are invited and of course if you are friend ? you are also invited if ever interested.



coming to business i dont know my startup would exit in future. i just poaln to g et income from game thingy for a year as if it gets popular. then i would delegate my shares to the ceo of the reti company. and work on other projects. i mean i dont like business tasks since they are super hard. i dont quite understand economy either. i just as told have a short term goal of creating nice income in a short period of time via a possibly popular game and then  working on other topics. i do find business super hard. i like to read other areas like areas i mentioned. business is super stressful i think. its for people who can handle stress. i thnk i am more lazy type in that aspect. i am not a bnsiness person i think. since i dont understand of economy topics also. as told, i want to learn on mny topics and yepp have agendas/goals on doing creating things/learning things.  but i dont think i am any business person since i lack that stress handling talent.   or economy knowledge i also lack.so i would never be the ceo ever. and would delegate my management t asks to ot her people since as told i am not a person who is for being a business person. i want to create capital but without business related responsibilities. and indie games is a super way to do that:) and that i dont like repeatedly doing some projects. e.g. if i had game company i had to create other games, but i think if i do create project, i dont like creating the other game. since as told i dont take fun from business tasks. since i have no such experience and since i lack talent in that area which is super hard. i dont like living life in stress that much:P and business roles includes being ab le to handle stress. whilst i like to avoid stress. so in my startup i wont be t he ceo since its super hard role i thin k, i dont have capa bility set to be the ceo. i dont know about hiring people or being competitive tricks in industry or else super heavy tasks/stresses. so i better be some share holder i think thats the easier role thats more suited to me. if ever i have a startup, thats why i wont want to be the ceo since i dont have capability set to be the ceo. i like to avoid stress. i like comfort zones. i dont understand from economy etc...  as told i have some goals in life, an  d would accomplish one by one:)


ok you always like to make jokes about me i dont know why:) so i guess its because a nerd friend?  :)



so goals in life:
 one is creating a popular indie game:) and delegating all respoinsibilities to others (e.g. future ceo of reti company we need a ceo. or i might be temprrly or my onder bro might be) but wish that we could find a cofounder ceo after startup gets launched so ceo does whatever she/he wants to the company:P  i think its better we find a "she" ceo since to add more numbers to "she" side in that. and leave the company to her and she does whatever she wants. cause i honestly lack any type of talent to manage a company. and not interested to management due to that:)  i just create my first n many zeroes from that t hern i would switch to building projects and learning new things topic in my peaceful alaska home:P


ok so after game is ready, maybe we never either have managemtn things. we just win our  n zeroes from customers alreadly. or we add a ceo cofounder (a she/ a  her) and she does whatever she wants to our company (for sure she would do better than me:D i have no talent in managing any company ever:D and i dont like stress either:P i like comfort zones things:) and i dont think i have talent to be ceo. so b etter lets find a ceo cofounder to our company:) when game gets ready:) and better it is a "she". for gender balance. i am not a product person like ceos. so better i dont be any time a ceo. i have no goals of product ideas. i dont have such type of creativity. so thats why i dont want or dont have that goals. i cant udnerstand what other people likes. or cant think new creative product ideas on same productline. i am not talented in creativcity when its a continous work. i could only be creative in digital fashion. maybe like being creative once but maybe for next 5 years not any being creative. i dont have con tnious talent in suych things. and as told i easily get fatigue to repetitive tasks.  so i definitely think i dont have any capability to be any ceo. since i cant sense what people want from a product. i am not a good product owner/creator.  i am a more other type of people, leisure liking type of people, that likes to does creativity in leisure form. i dont like taking responsibilities. i am not a leader. so better be someone else be the leader.   i am not a person who likes taking responsibilities. but leaders takes responsibilities. so better ceo be someone other than me. lets find a she for that:) guys also do that good. but woman could also do that good. and also LGBT members also. i wish we see more LGBT member CEOs more also. to balance the numbers more in these things:)) (i dont have leadership traits so i do think its best i never be a ceo. (cause a ceo cant be lazy:) if i talk i like being lazy:D that wouldnt any fit to any leader:) i am not any fit for any management role due to that:D if leader talks about laziness:D what the team would do:P)  i mean i dont have any character type suited for being  a leader:)  maybe i am wrong. i dont know. maybe i change in future and would like to be a leader. i dont know. i would see in time. but first would code the game thingy:)

i am kind of person who whilst initing a startup choses the startup type even with checking the necessary future effort that would be spent to it:P i mean super lazy state:P so i am not suitable to be any leader anytime i think:) i always try to select the laziest way:P so not suitable to be any leader anytime:) and i also dont like taking responsibilities. so thts another reason why i dont like leading things. best career to me would be either being a developer or beign a share holder and like everyone else, same goal of life long learner career. i have problems in caring things super much and a product owner should care the products super much. so thats why another reason i cant be a leader. i am not suited to be any leader anytime i think. so respects to all leaders. their responsibilities are quite hard.

so if onder bro also accepts, or if he doesnt want to be the ceo, our ceo would be a she:) and she could do whatever she wants to our company :) of course we would be shareholders:) and of course we would also be in decisive power. but she would be t he main responsible of decisions. so if game gets ready, i would try to find a woman or gay or trans ceo:)  to  balance th enumbers in that since its shared unfairly or there is gender gap and all genders could do hard tasks.







ok i do think i should first make game ready and then talk like this:) i mean finding a ceo to the reti project is much later step. first game should be ready:) but in that step, my agenda is like that:) i wish so bad i find a trans ceo to the game or woman or gay.



---- possible stalk incident report:


ok whilst a woman passed  3minutes at this 4:19am hour beside our house shouting "sedat make sleep" words. this sedat name were also constant in stalk incidents. so it might be really these stalker people set. or unrelated tpeople who walked at 4:20 am beside our house. since i am constantly stalked, i think the chances that these people who passed 4 minuts ago being from stalker people set is quite high.  i now understood, sedat name might be the 11 th character /label? :SSSSSSS or the woman shouted sedat to a man beside her? since curtains is closed i hadnt seen. ok so ther eis a slgiht possiblty now that, sedat is the 11th name the impersonator tries to assign me. this is super scary to me :S this sociopathy i confront is super levels of sociopathy/stalk. and also like a comedy mvie also since its super absurd/super illogical beside that.:S might sedat be the 11th name being assigned by sociopath mert? holy:S this is super levels of sociopathy:S i ddnt seen whom the woman said such sentence to since curtains is closed. ok. this stalk i confront is super levels of sociopathy for sure:SSSSSSSSSSSSSSS  i think getting stalked by a mentally ill person(named mert) is the creepiest thing ever happening in my life. sometimes i find it as a comedy movie but sometimes i feel inside trauma. right now iddnt entered trauma or found it as a comedy movie. i just found it super levels of creepy.:SSSSSSSS this stalk incident happening in this hour:S   and either an impersonation happens or there were also a sedat named person beside th ewoman. as just curtains is closed, i had no chance to see. woman just shouted such sentence:SSSSSSSS its super creepy:SSSSSSSS but i hadnt entered trauma. or i am constantly in trauma so i dont feel entrance or leave state?(since this sociopath mert and his friends stalks constantly wth such these ways) no no no. i today afternooon smiled, be happy etc. so i am not constantly in trauma. so nice, a sociopathy/stalk icnident happent at 4:20 am but i ddnt entered trauma this . nice .but its still hell creepy:SSSSSSSS these stalker helper people are maniacs:SSSSSSSS the mert named sociopath stalker and his helpers are all maniacs:S they come to besid ehouse to shout creepy sentences like this:SSSSSSSS or the woman shouted sedat should ease my sleeping problem:S psycho sedat named psycho stalker and his helper stalker woman:SSSSSSSSSSS pscyhos/sociopaths:SSSSSSSSSSSSSS



  ----
ok by the way i wish so bad whatsapp creators dont get upset to me. i tried to mean i adore their simple way. that they crea ted  a super scalable structure and had maintainance costs of just 10 people as i remember?? i mean billions of people scale power with just many little maintenance effort/creation effort. thats my goal also. not onkly in technical side(analogies of whatsapp were in technical side),  but in also startup typ[e that st artup takes little amount of effort from me. i mean analogies of whatsapp were about its technical superiority of scalability with such little maintenance effort (that 10 people could manage a service that scales to billions)  but i ddnt made analogies that its an easy startup type. its not. i want to apply that easy /simple things methodology to the startup type i chose, so i chose indie games, since it felt kind of easier to me than other domains.   i mean whatsapp is one hero startup, to create a service that has that much less maintenance costs. i used that example/as agoal  in not in that specific domain its example but also to
the management efforts (i dont think management effort of whatsapp would be any economic. it should be super hrd to manage since its a very big prduct.  i meant its technical maintenance cost whilst they scaled to billions, i mean the example of creating a technical solution that scales to billions of people and could be technically managhed by just 10 (or wer eit 20?) people. that part i tried to take example of. in management side of the product, i dont think it is any easy startup type to manage. i take that example an d also want to apply in case of having a startup type that has very little management effort to me. and indie games quite look like that? or i am wrong since i am unexperienced. but initially they look quite like that. if i have another ceo (a she or gay ceo or  mostly anticipated, a trans ceo we would like to see) manages the management, it would be super easy to me that which i targedt since being a silly super lazy person:)

i mean i like lazy modes. that are simple. sometimes things arent simple either. but when i see a service that scaled to billions with just 10 people, i truly adore:) the chosen technology and the experience of software engineering that enabled it.

ok in nowadays, cloud providers also enable to lower the maintenacne /technical costs of startups. but those times clouds wernt capable as now when whatsapp were invented. so its one of my fav startup examples:) to create some nice service with minimal resources being spent. sometimes thats not possible. this model is not applicable to all domains. but i just tried to mean i like this model. i also try to apply that to my startup type selection criterion. and indie games looked such place to me. that i can find a ceo manager and for technical costs, it would be just a game for a year, i dont think we might need to even hire people? ceo if likes would might hire. or if ceo would like to furtherly create new products based on that tech, might hire.as told i definitely think i wont  be in that startup after 1 year after i win my capital to continue building other projects.

i mean the concept of a continuum in product isnot my mindset, i like temporary products or i like to attend in  such fashion the creatio n sector. an d i am fan of people who like to work in continuum ways of course. i just am not like such person who works in continuum.
and since i dont like to work in continuum ways but that i favor short creation periods along differnt areas as i target, i am not any good product person. so ceo like roles dont ever fit me.  i mean i cant focus my attention more than 1 year on a product. i like short temporal product creations things.


i mean my goal is without any exit in my presence in company, scaling out and winnin g  from as told in game commerce like suits or things in game and or subscription costs. and leaving all to other people in one year then i dont know as told have lots of other goals like learning topics and new things.

so ceo roles wont ever fit me sinc ei do understand nothing from economy. and also i am visibly a lazy person. and not great at leading. yeah so this is my goals in these.                                                                                            
                          
i mean my goal is to create a popular game, then get income from ingame ecommerce things like selling of suits or game things. and/or subscription models. then after a year leaving and  focusing on another business. ceo would decide what to do. after 1 year of sole self existence of company, after we leave the company, she could also sell to other companies. but in our presence we wont  sell and create income from the inside game thing. but after i leave the product else, she could do whatever she wants.


so reti is expecting be a self sustaining business with no exit and sell out for a year. and after a year, after we leave the company, ceo could do whatever she likes to. thats the goal for reti project. its a 1 year project. to be self sustaining and very profitable service for at least a year, thats the goal for this guhu. of course ceo(she most possibly?) might have other goals. but for first year, i would like the agenda of this future company to be like this. and after one year, aft er i leave she could do whatever she wants:) but for first year, target is to be a self sustaning place and i dont think we need to ever hire people ever. might hire a cloud admin or  two. some designers.  then we leave the company, she could scale or else. i just want to deal with minimal effort in first year and make some zeroes from profits. and move to other projects then. and i think if we succeed to stay small team, and little responsibilities, i would stay also 2 years. i mean i dont want to sell my company to other companies. would stay as a self owned business  but after i leave the company, the ceo can do anything she wants:) this is the agenda of this reti project:) there is a weirdo co-founder with very weird wishes :D to this reti project thats constructed.

so i dont think its logical to call startup t o such company model i envision? i dont know lets call it just company then:D (since startups are built for growth, mine  is explicitly bu ilt for me to create capital and then leave the company and con tinue to other projects)

ok i would t ry to create some zeroes in minimal stress level situation type of setting. thats the goal. so thats why i dont want to scale whilst i exist in the company. if i leave or if people fire me, they can scale. but while i exist, i want minimal responsibility. so whilst my existence, i plan to have a self sustaining and high profitable company and planning  to leave it like that.  and then when after i leave, they can sell or get more investments to grow. no my agenda is n ot being a startup that grows. mine is being at least team member size whilst i exist. but after i leave or get fired due to my weird requests like this, they can be like other startups that like to grow. i at most wish to stay at most 1 or 1.5 year there. and create some zeroies of capital during my presence. so whilst i am  there, we c ant name it as a startup.i want to scale in customers wise, e.g. maybe millions of players. but not in team size. or i dont know this is my agenda for firts year. scaling super fast but with little team. with very little team. and i wont be sad if game gets unpopular in one year, thats one anticipated risk. and i wont be in to creating other games eithers. so there is no continuum planned in this temporal business type. so i dont think we can name it a startup ther thing  i try to build? it could evolve to a startup but after i either get fired :D or after 1 year that i leave:) i dont want big respoinsibilities. i want little start up and little team. and i dont thin k we cuold tell this temporal business activity as startup ?  i wish a name existed also for such business endeavors? reason for wanting such b  usiness model? is because i dont want responsibilities. i want short term business setups. an  d create capital. so indie games seems an easy way to establish great capital value in short times like a year. want to create a self sustaining business then leave and focus on learning  things mre an d maybe again building again.


ok maybe i should be the ceo of this business since the ceo we add might fire me due to my nongrowth desire:D(i ma not mentioning customer size, its ok to grow in customer size, i am mentioning team size) for sure i would be fired by the ceo:DDDD so lets hmm i do think maybe i or my onder bro be the ceo, then win some zeroes then leave the company in profitable state to some possible she ceo? so that conflict doewsnt happen. that my lack of desire for responsibility doesnt makes me get fired from company i found:D ok so change of plan, for not to be fired by the appointed ceo:), for first year we do ceoing thing sicne company is nnot any big we could manage that ? (ok i cant manage a big company but can manage a small company)  so that yepp. we win some zeroes from game. and we do a small projection of  ceo tasks not real ceo tasks (since we arent experienced or since i dont also like responsibility things) for such a small team business. we scale customers with minimal effort requireing business type of indie games. then we leave business. yeppp this is the plan. ok finding a ceo cofounder seems risky cause for sure she or he would fire me since i dont want growth in time i exist:) (i only dont watn growth in company size, i want growth in customer size, but long term growth of customer size depends on growth of team/company size. but  alas, as told, this is a short term project to me. ) (so better not find a ceo cofounder or else she fires me in mid of next year:D)


ok lets continue coding  to this weird initial short term project plan:) (ok if we have a ceo that would definitely fire me foir such short term company agenda  XD)

ok these are the goals:D lets establish goals one by one:)

ok coding game fun started:)


** report of stalk incident outside home:
 ok meanwhile sociopathy thing still happens at outside of home at different hours . but i dont  any second care:)   sociopath stalker mert and his 11 characters he creates to sociopathy target.  i dont care nor stress :)  this thing really, due to its absurdity, is like a comedy movie or alike genre.




***stalk alert: a woman most possibly with phone shoutedly talked sina/tomris names. these names were constantly repeated in stalk. so this woman hwom 5 minutes ago shoutedly talked in outside is quite possibly belonging to stalker sociopath's articulated people set.sociopathy alert! i would have such sec tion iun blog as  either sociopathy alert section when these articulated people comes beside my house to do shoutedly sociopathy sentences. its like a scomedy movie:D the articulated woman told some socio sentences as being articulated by phone's remote end visibly. this is definitely like a comedy movie:D  ok i counted 11 names :D ok wondering if this 11 names would be enough or they would invent new names/new characters/new labels:D
and 1 hour before htat, a guy outside named syl name which is also a stalker name that i heard in these stalk incidents of multi label thing. the guy said syl get over. and also said "homicide" word. ok i wish its not their next plan on me.i dont scare from these sociopaths:D ok this is really like a comedy movie:D  i dont scare from the root sociopath(mert named) and his articulated people:D ok one other day a guy walked in street shoutiung syl is a psycho. ok so mert named sociopath's second name could be syl? possible. ok. i am watching a sociopath's fantasy world and its creations. 11 names created yet:D ok. watching a sociopath's mental world with confronting sociopathy/stalk.i remember 3 years ago, one woman shouted oluk and said some sntnce includng syl name. and i remember one name from 11 characters be said with also syl name. a woman shouted syl is a shizoid. ok. 11 names yet. :D i dont scare from this sociopath (its eiter mert syl named or maybe i dnt knw syl or mert is the root stalker). and i find it as a comedy movie:Dbefore i scared/entered trauma. now its a movie about mental illness. but a comedy one since the things mentally ill craft is super absurd:D super illogical:D
i remember 3 years ago this syl's stalk in neighbourhood. and in ankara, when i went to cafes he would shout harrasment sentences via woman beside him. he would stalk me in cafes. and so this syl might be the root stalker. or this syl hsa also mert name. have none idea whom these sociopaths are nor names are. but i watch with laughs to this comedy movie i observe of hopeless effort of sociopathy done for 3 years:D  ok does a sociopath thinks of homicide when his sociopathy against the stalk target doesnt work? that might be happening. or else. i dont know but i dont scare cause i dont go outside home either:) ok one guy in outside shouted "syl is a psycho". so the root stalker might have syl mert name? whtvr name this psycho has (either it is syl or mert) i dont scare:D and laugh out loud to this sociopathy i observe. i remember this psycho got satisfaction from saying harrasing sentences to me in cafes in my ankara time. ok psycho movie from alfred hitckok movies is presented to you in this blog instance. is nto it like such that. anyway i dont scare  from this sociopath's stalk. lets see what else name label he would create:D i counted 11 names yet:D ok so, either the root stalker has both mert and syl names. or: mert is articulated by syl. or syl is articulated by mert. either 3 of these possibilities are happening.  ok being a computer engineer and a psycho from alfred hitckok mvies does stalk me with sociopathy:) ok this is super absurd. but also i just cant anymre stress to this stalk and find it asa comedy movie. whom they ddnt impersonated. even foreign man name is used in impersonation:D i mean a whole big  set of character creation capabilities and stalk with that. this is really like psycho movies. but due to absurdity and maniacness level i confront, i find it as a comedy movie. the thing i see looks like as comedy movies:D
ok lets get not lost in sociopathy movie i watch. its like na movie the sociopathy i see/confront. lets go back to coding.yappp fun of game coding:) Ok whilst being a computer engineer, confronting this sociopathy acts from a sociopath looks super levels of absurd and due to that it looks super levels of funny:D ok the last night the woman whom shouted otuside at 5am i remember her voice in recent days stalk, in where she shouted me cutie and some sociopathic sentences of calling me gay and some sociopathic label:D ok being called gay doesnt makes me upset(i am not any gay but i dont care if people would call me gay or not, whilst i am 100% hetero) but the sociopathic label made me upset.  then last night at ~5am she passed around house's surrounding.and 1 year ago, a woman shouted "she is fan to me". so in these 12 characters, there is a gay people set stalking with also crafting sociopathic labels. i like gays people but this enters sociopathy region . but i do think they are articulated by the root stalker mert or syl. i mean since there is 11 or alike characters:D this is really like a comedy mvie:D so the oine of those sociopathic labels is crafted created by that gay woman whom stalks me at 5am beside my house. but i do think she is articulated by the mert or syl named sociopath stalker. i am not any gay by the way, i am 100% hetero.

ok whilst stressing to this character/sociopathic labels creation thing i observe, my hair got whiter and my aunt told how much whiter it got. so no more stressing to this sociopathy i confront. i dont think those gay people have any role in this character creation thing. but i do thin k they are articulated by the mert or syl named psycho stalker.

i counted 11 or alike names/labels. labels are quite disgusting. its like a fantasy world:S and lots of impersonation filled world it is this thing i confront. its not ok to be created characters that i am not any. i mean sociopathy is not any acceptible. the labels tried to be crafted are super ugly. but i dont think its these gay people doing this. it must be the root stalker mert or syl nam ed psycho sociopath. and there were a boris named stalker also. but not heard/silent /not stalking last month. stalked me with same curses/narratives these people stalk me. so i devies that since due to stalk incidents sentences i heard that there is a root stalker named mert (most possibly mert named) or syl named. and articulates these people all. 11 characters :D its like a comedy movie:D  i counted at least 11 characters creation :D at least 11 names or labels get created in this never ending stalk/sociopathy against me and not only i am impersonated, also other people gets. as i observed i were given a foregin man name in one of 11 characters. ok names dont matter. or ork shoutings dont matter. but the labels are disgusting. i mean the creation of fantasy worlds in which labels that doesnt any suit me are assigned to me with along with these extra names and its super disturbing. i mean the imerpsonation thing. is super disturbing  and being stalked with those 11 or alike names labels. beign cursed sometimes. being shotued ork sometimes. and cursed with 11 differnt names/characters:S its as i told a multidimensional stalk.the gay character is just only 1 character. there are lots of characters i told. so those gay poepl;e are just articulat ed by the root stalker.(who has mert or syl name) i mean this stalk isnot happening by them (b y those gay people i mentioned). it definitely looks like this.

in one character , as hande name, i remember 1 year ago,  they shouted me (a woman shouted me) hande and shout ed "if ever hande sells". thes epeople that woman wanted to me sell  sex or something like that as i get from that sentence. in a subway a woman shouted again "sell!" so these people both shou8ted me fukara (super poor) and wanted me to sell something to them:S this is super creepy. i am stalked by psychos:S as told my hair got whiter:S but from stalk sentences i get understood that the root stalker has mert or syl name. from all sent ences i heard. these people whom try to stalk me socioipathy tried to make me sell sex i infer with such ways? wth such stalk. but never happened and they could never do any such thing. but my hair got whitened whilst confronting this psychopathy/sociopathy. i mean its so absurd to confront this things whilst i am a computer engineer:S these p-eople lack any logic. to them, i think people who wear not rich are all super poors adn they could stalk them to ask for her to sell sex:S this sell word has happent last year. before, in all 3 years, first 2 years were all ork shoutings fukara shoutiings. then last year the "sell" word started to be shouted. all this 3 years of stalk goes to nonesense cause i never ever replied or they couldnt reach their such evil goal.the people constantly shouted me super poor 3 years ago and ork curses. and last year they started to ask me sell something (i guess its sex ? it looked like that from shouted sentence) and i replied with i am an engineer. but they also persist stalk even still even here and their helpless hopeless stalk for such psycho goal that it never reached success state, make s me happy, that their stranger things movie like articulated people like state like stalk their helpless hopeless stalk and it never reacvhing to any goal and that makes me happy. that i find it as a comedy movie. since these maniacs hopeleslly try to do these acts to a computer engineer and with n mny characters creation things and but they are like hopelessly doing this stalk and it makes me happy  to show them that, they cant reach their goal of stalk. it looks like a comedy movie to me. they helplessly hopelessly come t o my house to shout to buy me? why the fck they think i am for sale:SSSSSS these people are psycho for sure. its like those psycho relgiious cults i think. that disturbs poeple unrelatedly like this, i do think these people are psycho like that. they target a woman who looks poor to their eyes, stalk with first ork/oluk/fukara/ac shoutings and many character creations that she first doesnt understand that they give her names/labels. then in 3rd year, they helplessly whilst their mental breakdown of woman they target ddnt worked, they blatanlty asked the target of stalk to sell (sex? most possibly) in the stalk and do so helpless/hopeless shoutings to establish that. but know what, i am super strong,  nothing worked against me. and their helpless hopeless psychopathy sociopathy acts looks now kind of comedy movie to me. I mean their helpless stalk. for to reach such goal for 3 years. and never ever being able to reach. that makes me happy and makes me feel like as when they still stalk like this, their these acts makes me feel like watching a comedy movie. so this reliugious cult like psychos, their acts are have order of: they try to break the mental snaity of the target they chosen with ork/oluk/fukara shoutings for 2 years. and when she doesnt reply nor care, in 3rd year, they directly passed to asking what they ask from the stalk victim and the stalk victim shows its not possbile to them. and it feels like a comedy movie. a bunch of psychos plays a sociopathy acts against me. and its definitely like a comedy movie. they did very much shit stalk to reahc their goal b ut nothing worked and that makes me a proud person:) for not letting sociopaths reachign their psycho goals. and these maniacs still try to reach their goals like this. its like they invested alot effort to make me sell sex to them? then since it ddnt worked and since they invested lots of stalk effort to that, they just dont stop and continue. its super funn y to watch how helpless they are in the sociopathy acts they apply against me. its funny to watch this comedy movie.they are so helpless in their goal. and it feels definitely super levels of funny to me:) to watch psychos doing sociopathy acts so helplessly/so hopelessly:)i mean whatever they did tried never worked out:)   and it feels super funny that they still continue such sociopathy acts. i dont know why these psychos selected me for such goal. is it i looked dumb from outside? is it i looked poor? do i have an enemy that hires these people? i dont know what the heck is going on, but i show them they cant reach their psycho goals after all their 3 eyars of sociopathy effort. and it feels funny to me. to see they are continueing their sociopathy acts:)

so i do think this stalk i confront is actually a criminal activity like stalk. i mean its not a little stalk. its super sociopathy levels of stalk. constant names creation and ork shoutings for 2 years and then 3rd year this sell request shoutings. and such narratives. the stalk started with "ork","oluk","fukara" shoutings. and 3rd year it transcended to "sell!" shoutings twice as i heard. it has been shouted twice such word. so this is not a light level of stalk. this is super levels of sociopathy/maniac behavior i confront from sociopath and his helpers. the stalker is either woman or man. i dont know. maybe that gay woman is the stalker or that mert name is the stalker. i have none idea. but this stalk is not any light form of stalk. its a super sociopathic version of stalk. they even ask to sell from the stalk victim:S its i cant find words any to describe the sociopathy of these acts, it undefinable levels of maniac behavior/sociopathy. but now i see it as a comedy movie as i see their all hopeless/helpless efforts to reach such psycho goals. nothign works against guhu. guhu is a super strong computer engineer:) no sociopath stalker (whether mert named or gay woman) could reach  such goals against her. i do htink the gay woman is not the root stalker but the mert named spycho. due to stalk sentences i heard. since in this stalk, klots of names i heard, like rahmi and he and a woman shouted oluk 1 week ago as i reported here.


i would kill myself instead of selling anything:S i mean i would prefer being dead instead of such acts:S i have a super level of super ego in such things.and also, all my life, whenever i need any money my parents exists i mean i dont need any money of anyone ever also. and my parents would long before told htey would give me home in future. i mean i dont any ever needed anyone's money ever either. there always exists and existed my own family. my family is a family type who supports for a year when if you need. i am super lucky in my family. i mean and i grew up with high super ego. so this is the most absurd thing i confronted in life. to confront suhc sentence/such sociopathy. cause i would prefer being dead instead of selling sex:S i dont even easily let people enter my life for bf topics. i mean i have disgust sensitivity to characters. i mean i have disgust sensitivity to ideas. like selling idea is super disgusting to me. i would prefer being dead instead of such thing. and i feel like this thing  i confront this sociopathy i confront these years, is the most absurd thing i ever seen in my life. but to me its a comedy movie. these sociopaths still try to reach that goal with stalking me with sociopathy, or just stalk like zombies. but their helplessness/their hopelessness in reaching such goal feels like a comedy movie to me. they are quite hopeless for reaching such goal. i would prefer being dead for such thing they stalk for. i would really prefer being a dead person. and no i am not in any depression either. i just laugh to this comedia i observe.i lauygh out loud to their hopeless helpless sociopathy acts. they still stalk with repeated sociopathy acts as i mention. impersonation. constant stalk. its like these people look like a pscyho religious cult. that targets an atheist to stalk like this. i do think this possibility is also still quite strong. cuase there is never ending this sociopathy i see never ends. constant effort, a guy shouted 3 minutes ago saying "she is ada" (ada as told is an impersonation name).   the guy shotued 1 mnute ago again a sociopathic sentence. ok. zombies outside. comedy movie:) lets buy some popcorn. their helpless/hopeless sociopathy acts. lets watch:) i am not any entering trauma due to this sociopathy i confront. i just watch it like a comedy movie:) hints: they are super helpless in reacing their sociopathic goals:) so lets watch their helplessness their loser sociopathy acts against me like a comedy movie:) its the most absurd thing i ever seen in my life, for being a successful/quite blissed computer engineer graduated from one best school and having parents that supports me everytime i need and confronitn such sociopathy/stalk. lets watch this comedy movie:) hint: they are super hopeless loser sociopaths:) guhu against sociopath stalker and his or her helpers :) right now in theathers:) i am watching this comedy movie:) before i called this horror movie now its definitely a comedy movie :)lets see what this zombie like sociopath stalker woman shout this day:) lets see:) zombies trying to say something  to engineer guhu:) lets see:) ah loser sociopaths psychos.definitely a comedy movie. lets take some popcormn and watch what sociopath shouts this day:) articulated by a him or her, lets see what articulated socio shouts:) i definitely want popcorn beside watching this comedie movie:)  ok sorry i wrongly written woman, last 10 minutes ago shouting were frm man. and thin king, i  dont any think, that gay woman are behind this stalk. i do think they are articulated by the root stalker whom has mert or rahmi or syl name. anyway.  lets continue to life. do you people have life where you need to buy popcorn to watch sociopaths? yes i do have:) and i do think this thing  is really like a comedy movie:D its just i stop scaring of going outside: ) and would carry popcorns with me:) and whenever sociopath start to stalk i would take on readi ng glasses and eat from popcorn :D  I dont know why i found stalk scary before. i just found sociopathy as super creepy. but thinking now, that they are helpless loser hopeless sociopaths doing sociopathy, i feel now instead its a comedy movie:) and would carry popcorn during the day beside me:) ok i dont want to miss any minute of this sociopathy show i dont know why:D i wish everyt ime i catch the sociopathy incidents and watch what the socios say:D with popcorn for sure:D loser helpless hopeless sociopaths doign  loser helpless hopeless sociopathy against guhu the engineer. so lets not miss any second of this next show of comedy movie:) with popcorn for sure:)


ok whilst i were listening with popcorns the socio talks in outside, the guy whom said this "some curse sentence tht i dont trnslte here". "hamit should get over". hamit is one other name in this stalk i confronted continously. and so maybe the root stalker is hamit named? and some people before shouted "saral  kuma"  ok as i  got suspiciou sof before, these people might be the people whom shouted "kuma " 3 years ago and i never looked at. and they do revenge like this since i rejected 3  years ago their kuma desire?. and their family culture has such killing woman behavior?. they try to kill my life like this with this sociopathy? to get revenge of rejection?. . have other theories alike and i have none info on whts going on. but i heard saral and kuma words. i heard saral name also constantly in this stalk. and they said kuma word. so this might really such thing a pscyho family culture that kills woman whom reject their request of wanting a kuma and they kill the life of woman with sociopathy/stalk like this only because of revenge of rejection of such request? . ok i am tired of trying to udnerstand whts happening. i just dont care. as said i would watch with popcorns when these scoiopaths stalk me  with sociopathy.i truly have none idea whts going on and why such psycho sociopath people stalk me like this for 3 years. for sure they cant reach their goals. i dont let them. i wont let them. and but i really wonder who are these maniacs and whts their motive for this 3 years of stalk like this. but they are messing with a wrong woman for sure. this womanh would laugh out loud to their sociopathy&sociopathy acts against her :) and continue building her game:)i would establish every dream of mine. even in unfair condition of unluck of being stalked by sociopath stalkers as i report about. (so the root stalker has hamit name then? anyway i dont care nor stress. as tell when i catch, i would listen with popcorns thee sociopathy acts of these sociopaths and would laugh out loud to their loser hopeless helpless sociopathy acts/talks.  )



----





ok returning to daily life:

ok mom did some tomato juice for winter for to use in meals in winter and i dont know why but the stink of it comes to my room:D i like tomato super alot. but this stink i ddnt liked.might be coming from ceiling of loft of home. since ventilator passed the stink so stink comes from windows so its either in garden place or in ceiling. they love to prepare winter pre baked foods to consume tastier tomato in winter since tomato's normal season is summer. winter tomatoes i also like taste of.  my fav plant  is tomato for sure. we have tomato  (small ones) in our garden but they are too small. ok seeing the beans makes me remembering the Darwin's texts in some schools library:) lots of things to read a bout(also linnean;s books i want to read about).  being a super ignorant person, i have lots of things to read on every domain including this domain. and i remember pnoumokok bacteria experiemnts i listened in some genetic engineering lectures for how biology is actually alot/super complex. our proffesor in that lecture really look like the proffesors in cartoons. same stereotype of look and lectures the course awesome and tells awesome stories about how genes were found. i left the course in middle  but must be remaining in coursera course stack.  its one course i liked a lot in coursera, like some other course. i like learning such topics from coursera topics i wonder usually. i like coursera and edx alot. btu  hadnt ut ilized fair well. long before, i even watched coursera while my car stopped in traffic:) i constantly read/learnt things 4 years ago. wonder when i would  get back to that state:) or if i would ever get back. lets see.  (i wernt like that 7 years ago. then i decided to be a curious person and but it get left in the middle 3.5 years ago).



ok lets get back to coding game yeppp => i figured out i wrongly used quaternions:P gonna fix that:) i wish i work nice today. maybe 4 hours or alike.or  maybe 8 hours. i figure out i sleep 5 hours every day but after 6am. i dont sleep at nights i turned to such state of sleep order. i dont sleep at night usually some days i sleep somedays i dont sleep. today lets not sleep and continue coding game. i think its like, in 5 days, i sleep 1 day, other 4 days i sleep at either 5am or 6 am and wakeup late like 11 am or 12am. and 1 day i sleep normally. but if this persists, i think i would be a nigh owl that studies at nights completely. and also during the day. if i dont procrastinate. i shouldnt definitely:)


----
if you dont do sbt compile line for a long while, then get prepared for a devastating list of compile time errors:) as happens right now:D anyway half of is gone half of is remaining:)


guhu's one important problem:S  the IDE doesnt show the line number in set color:D and has no contrast difference in back/fore - ground:D  (for line number place) :S
why it doesnt read the pref. file:S anyway.  forcing super hard to read the line numbers from shadow settings:DDDDDDDD
my operating system is a different one,  must be due to that:)


----- stalk alert -> 
ok current report of stalk, a guy shouted a foreign name but is impersonating that foreign name. its the second foreign name used. thats impersonated. its a different foreign name. but this time, i am impersonated with this foreign man name.   as if i am a gay woman. cause i confronted that in one stalk incident  before. this behavior of using foreign man names behavior and stalking wtih such 11th character thats impersonated. another foreign guy name were impersonated by someone else that has no such foreign name as i saw in another stalk incident.

ok as i catch i would reflect these incidents one by one as happens.

constant  impersonation. as i observe i do reflect here. 

this is the 11th character? or 12th?. i am impersonated as a gay woman with such foreign man name shouted  5  min ago. super level of sociopathy. this is the 11th character or 12th. (i am not any gay. but confrintng this constant impersonation by these socio people, many names many labels. (as i get from stalk sentences,  not all names are gay from that 11 or 12 characters  i saw from stalk incidents.) but all disturbing sociopathy .


ok where is the popcorns? i definitely need popcorn in confronting sociopathy  of these sociopath stalker people. while laughing out loud to this sociopathy i am confronting.
ok one thing for sure, these sociopaths really make a persons day quite interesting:D ok nth wanting to have popcorn time:D its definitely a comedy movie.ok and i really got addicted:D since its super funny:) these people and their helpless sociopathy effort against an engineer. lets see what next they would do in stalk around guhu's house thing. ok i really got addicted to confronting sociopathy acts of these people :D i mean to watching and laughing to this comedie movie:D just needing more popcorn i think:D but this is one very good comedie movie. hey some group of guys walked and told "tugra awakened". ok so the sociopaths (as i get tugra is one other name from this 11 names) get that i am self aware of the sociopathy act i am confronting. now lets be creative in resolving this mysterious stalk incident: thinkign is this a mirror test? an intelligence test to check when i would fully dechypher the stalk incident and be immune to this sociopathy acts i confront? is this such thin g? i mean this thing i confront is super levels of absurd. if some one came and said this is an intellgnce test, it would be more believable. i mean this much high level of sociopathy i confront deliberately done against me, this is so absurd and insane. ok i dont think this is any intellgnce test? to get in how much time i would become immune to this deliberate sociopathy acts i confront?i do think wht happens is i am stalked by sociopaths. and since people told "tugra awakened". this reallyu might be the "kuma " depiction i dechyphered as the happenstances? so my infernece of that this stalk i confront happens due to revenge of rejection ? of the "kuma" thing? that shouted 3 years ago? this hapepns since i rejected the kuma thing? that i never ever replied? does this sociopathy acts against me happens due to that? is this decyphering of sociopathy acts correct? or its something  else? ok this thing i confront is both super absurd and both is like a comedy movie:D so is the stalker named either hamit or mert or syl in that case? since from stalk sentences specifically this night's stalk sentence, there is a high possibilityu tht the root stalker is hamit. ok this is definitely an absurd comedie movie:) lets get popcorn when its played :) and yeah i think i wont be able to stop laughing out loud to this sociopathy type:)

ok my other explanation is very sad. other explanation is i have got a socio gay woman stalker whom became socio because she were oppressed? then likes to create impersonations?  than applies this impersonation to me for yuears but since doesnt receive any reaction, also creates such bad impersonation labels? this is another possible whats happning inference i thin k of. and is a sad one. i wish people never get oppressed specifically for their gender. i am not gay. but confronting this much character creation shwos up a socio behavior that roots from an oppressed mind state. i mean the lies i confront are like mandelbrot thing. i mean 12 or else characters. constant lie creation capabiluty. this either roots from an oppressed sociopath man or gay woman. i still hadnt decyphered whom these people are. if its man,this socio might had some oppression either from family or else, and turned sociopath due to that and since gets rejected(is it the kuma shouter 3 years ago?_ , gets a sociopathic revenge on that with character creation sociopathy? a rejection revenge? and if its  agay woman  whom the root stalker is, then i do thi nk this sociopathy resulted from oppression? so that constant lie creation has been the normal behavior and manipulates people with such lie creation thing? this is one of my decypherin gof this sociopathy i confront.

one other possible decyphering is that these people are  apsycho religious cult and try to torture me with sociopathy since i am an atheist.
one other possible decyphering?  i lack other decyphering options.

or because i talked i am not any leftist, some cmmnst group tries to torture me with sociopathy? this might be also whats going on?.

i still dont know whts hppnng. but these are my decyphered inferences of the ongoing comedy movie. (its not a comedy movie if the stalker is a gay woman, in that case, i think its sad, for people whom oppressed her to become a socio should be super sad. i mean if its a gay woman stalker, i dont find it as a comedy movie , but a sad story about how injustice happens in gender equality topics) (so when i say its a comedie movie, i exclude the possibility that the stalker is a gay woman inference/possibility. if thats the case, its not a comedy movie any. )



-------------------------
these are my inferences on the sociopathy comedy movie i confront/o bserve. lets get more popcorns. i am really getting addicted to confronting this sociopathy things:D i mean its really thrilling:D the sociopathy level and its like a movie for real:D (when i do say its a movie or comedy movie, as told, i exlude the sad possblty that the root stalker is a gay woman. if thats the case,s i have no bad words, if she became a socio, than people must have had oppressed her. i mean if the stalker is a gay woman, i have no bad words to her any. a nd i forgivce rher sociopathy acts against me if whats happngn is this? a sociopathy illness holding gay woman doing this to me? if so, i forgive her, cause i do think its easy to turn to a socio when being oppressed for gender topic?. but i wish she stops this sociopathy acts against me so bad also. cause its not ok. )


---
ok so when i say tis a comedy movie i exclude the possibility that t he stalker is a socio gay woman. its not a comedy movie if thats the case.




-------------------------------

ok lets gets popcorns for nights this comedie movie is shown played. lets see. i laugh out super hard out to sociopathy i confront and this imperosnation efforts. ok more funny sociopathy movies pelase:)   this one is super funny:) ok i never got impersonated in my life before, but the time i get impersonated, i am impersonated as 11 or 12 names/labels. ok this is super thrilling:D its the best and funniest sociopathy movie i see:) lets see what else these hopeless loser sociopaths would do as sociopathy acts. lets see next of this movie i watch:)they look like a bunch of psycho sociopaths whomever these people are. (i infer its a hamit nhamed stalker right? since in today's one stalk incident this exactly happent "*** is ----" "hamit get over".  so **** is one impersonation character. ---- i dont decipher that curse. so the highest possibilty is there is a hamit named sociuopath stalker that does get revenge of rejection (of not replying to his attntn) with this sociopathy acts. and i do think its a comedy movie. these bunch of sociopaths trying to do hopeless helpless loser sociopathy acts against a comp. engineer wmn. i mean its really like a comedy movie. i would get a popcorn to  watch the sociopathy/sociopathy acts of this comedy movie whenever it happens:)


----
i wonder when next time they would do again such sociopathy act against me/impersonation things:) i would make poopcorns ready:D its really like a comedy movie:) not any less:)  the  title of the comedy movie would be when a loser dumb sociopath targets a computer engineer woman(spometiems has been called even genius. though she knows she is not genius. but a generalist comp. engineer ) to do sociopathy acts against:)  i mean this sociopath hamit definitely selected a quite wrong target to do sociopathy acts agaisnt  :) hmm lets see what these hopeless helpless sociopaths do as next act. wondering next series of the comedy movie:) i wish tomorrow they also come to stalk and say helpless hopeless sociopathy sentences:) loser helpless hopeless sociopaths:) its a super funny comedy movie:) they in hope of stalking me come wander around this home's place to shout sociopath sentences:) losers:) helpless hopeless sociopaths:) forever mentally trapped to scoiopathy due to a sick brain state it looks as from myside this thing  is ee. but they selected quite a wrong target as a victim for such sociopathy. since because when they do such acts, this target for such acts laughs out loud and wants to bake popcorn to watch this comedy movie that she is confronted:) they really selected really a wrong woman to do sociopathy acts against:) (but i do think all other woman who are stalked  by socios must be at least as  pwrfl and also laughing out loud like me also.) and everyday it becomes more funnier as they dont even discover how hopeless their sociopathy effort is.   ehem. from myside this really looks like a super funny comedy movie. the sociopaths feels compulsion to come to beside of house and shout sociopath sentences. poor sick mind. but its definitely also a comedy movie for sure. their helplessness/ hopelessness in their sociopathy effort is for sure a comedy movie :) i mean i wish i had more intellgnt socioipaths stalking me. for since they think they could do this sociopathy acts against a computer engineer woman.(and also non computer en gineer woman they also wldng be able to stalk for sure. ehem. i crrct my wrng sentence forpossible wrong meaning as if non computer engineer woman are weak? defn tly not:) so it were a stupid sentence to say it like that.)
 as i told, the absurdity of this is firstly super funny:) then the hopelessness helpnesness of sociopathy acts i see ar ealso super funny:) lets see whatelse sociopathy thjings they would do ? lets see:) and make some popcorns for those moments of comedy movie:) ok everyday is super fun due to comedy movie i see:D i have endless laughing resources t hese times. ok. lets see what loser hopeless helpless sociopathy act this loser sociopath hamit wuold do tomorrow. lets see:) everyday is like a comedy movie:)



ok instead of coding i preferred resting last night:) and continueing the coding tasks today. always better to have big energy/be rested before starting something that feels as little bit important  in code. first need to fix the sbt compile output things:D still unfinished a long list of defects reoprt:) yeppp



ok the funniest comments i ever seen are under this video:D
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OdV6SkGZb3g

(of about stop reading comments and go back to studying comments:) they are super funny. opk i seen more funny comments in mobile phone's access. in pc i dont see much comments now. it were like 50 or 60 comments sayiong funny stop reading c omments and go back to work thing:D its gone those comments are gone:) i were referencing them:)  they wer ejust so funny but i cant see them now. maybe i were watching a different video? possible. they were super funny:D           



ok one wht the hck i coded here moments:) would try to remember intersection method:
its silly the code has some missing variable name and to recode that i need to remember what i had written:DDD silly me myself. i wish i did sbt compile whilst i had written this code:D
def intersect(shape:Shape): List[Vector3] = {
     shape match {
       case l:BoundedLine=> {
          var tmpLine:BoundedLine = BoundedLine(l.start, l.end)
          tmpLine.copy_transformation_in_reverse_from(this)
         
         
          var X_Rad2:Double = math.pow(size.x, 2.0)
          var Y_Rad2:Double = math.pow(size.y, 2.0)
          var Z_Rad2:Double = math.pow(size.z, 2.0)
         
         
          var A:Double = math.pow(tmpLine.x,2.0) * Y_Rad2 * Z_Rad2 +
          math.pow(tmpLine.y,2.0) * X_Rad2 * Z_Rad2 +
          math.pow(tmpLine.z,2.0) * X_Rad2 * Y_Rad2
         
          var b:Double = (2.0*tmpLine.orientation.x*tmpLine.start.x* Y_Rad2 * Z_Rad2)+
          (2.0*tmpLine.orientation.y*tmpLine.start.y* X_Rad2 * Z_Rad2)+
          (2.0*tmpLine.orientation.z*tmpLine.start.z* X_Rad2 * Y_Rad2)
         
          var c:Double = (math.pow(tmpLine.start.x,2.0)* Y_Rad2 * Z_Rad2)+
          (math.pow(tmpLine.start.y,2.0)* X_Rad2 * Z_Rad2)+
          (math.pow(tmpLine.start.z,2.0)* X_Rad2 * Y_Rad2) - (X_Rad2 * Y_Rad2 * Z_Rad2)
         
          var solution_list =D2_Polynomial_Solver(a,b,c)
          //missing length control, add later
          solution_list match {
            case Nil => Nil
            case a::Nil => {
              if(a>0){
                List(tmpLine + Vector3(tmpLine.orientation.x*a,tmpLine.orientation.y*a,tmpLine.orientation.z*a))
              }else {
                Nil
              }


bla  bla bla

so one should never do sbt compile late:DDDDDDDXD i have to remember whatg i coded here but currently initially i dont remember but it must be some easy logic for intersecting a line on geoid. a b c and d2 poly solver, aha remembering:) fck i wish i done sbt compile by thenXD


ok today's study mood i need to listen some fun music  like hmm mi dont know. which one i dont know:)


ok Mozart came up in playlist and liked it:) were listening techno. and techno were also nice.


better i have no friedns whilst i have such problems in life. lets continue coding game. and any wanna be friend to a weirdo person (who is a generalist computer engineer) is invited to parties/events in future for sure.


ok lets continue studying. today i am super happy as again my state in codging game after i got over some problematic place in algorithms of game. i were stuck for 4 days for thinking what to do. then i tried to simplify the problem. i wish i were genius and solved easily. anyway. lets continue coding this game and i am at a super fun parts:)trials part for coloring sky :) i wish i could try this day:) yayyyy again node.js and js code time:) it would be:) to add shaders code time it would be:) super fun:) excited even from now on even if i have still scala code to move to node.js and js and webgl code side:) its super exciting:)

i need to rerevise js  the 1000th time:D since hadnt written js code that much js code for a very long while.


la la la la i want to sing whilst coding:) its a nice day:) i have taken enough sleep(hadnt had sleep disorder problem last day) and coding the game:)
and some electronic song goes well to this happy mood + coding:)

as the distance between an online demo and current state gets lesser, i become excited:)  there is still alot to have the game finished but would be able to make online in some version:)

its super exciting:)

ok since this blog page has been full.

comes the next blog page:

https://weirdlife1234.blogspot.com/2019/08/blog-post.html