i tried esp cards and started wth retrorecgntn. were going abnormally good. then it went bad. did 8 over 25 in frst try. but first cards were going so ok. thrn after that that abnormal predction ended. first it went smoothly nearly all correct shocking me. then it started to get worse. i cldnt sleep last night and had headche issue so got leave in mid afternoon. 

first corrrct guesses shocked me i said ehat the heck then predction capablty abrptly got lost. then in other modes like precogniyion i epicly fsiled since frst predctns were going bad i left in middle. 

it felt as if i were to be predctng it got lost after some time. weird statistics science. 

it were like near full prediction as started which shocked me then by 7 or such it syarted to get near to vry much failure predctions 

i wondered this area again after this weird El! come! like shtngs hppnt.  not that i wld ever come if anybody shouts El come😜 (since whom ever wants to be a test subjet) what kind of a weird life i have i just wonder.  

i just wonder what kind of life this is. i mean its so shckng to cnfrnt such topic when some pple shted El come or guher! El! in recnt month. this is so weird. 

i dnt think esp exsts but got again curious to. 

 

it weirdly got sgone so perfect in first tries in that cards retrocognition task:D then it started to decline. then became to near to 0 level. then i felt as if ilost confidence in predicting either. 

i think this is nonsense. i think ESP doesnt exist. but since El come shoutings weirdly happent, i myself got interested again to this stuff. not that i would ever come when those people shouts El come:D whom wpould wants to be a test subject:D severe levels of creepy. 

what is more creepy in recent months were: in quora a retired army officer written: that the octopus would be partitioned to pieces if doesnt return to aquarium.  

this kind of were creepy coincidence. since i think 3 years ago or alike or little more before,  as told, this topics i were observing. like not that much friend but just person read in twitter had 2 hours ago told about octopus that army builds octopus robots. then 2 hours later without reading i told i am octopus. with octopus emoji cuteness i wanted to do such silly post. i those times were interested to these stuff so much. since it were like recent years of various observations on those topics that i g ot interested to that topic. most possibly due to trauma feeling maybe. i think person becomes more prone to believe such stuff really when is feeling trauma. you become more teleological. 

btu then recent months i read such post. that ifd octopus doesnt reetirn to aquarium would be partitioned to pieces from a retired army person. i think were coincidence. i reject this post's reality i mean scary that much i dont accept reality that someone would say me such thing since i told octopus emoji incidents in twitter in internet. or maybe kind of insane person and reads that and does a an insane comment like that. i dont know. but one what the heck moment in life that i ddnt accepted that it might bve ever written to me ever. i think it were just coincidence of internet. but more creepy stuff is like 1 month or 15 days ago, some person shouted a woman shouted "El! come!" (would any one would ever come if be shouted El come. anyone watched that movie sees that such life is not any easy. i mean being a test subject. whom would ever want that. )  then i tried to forget this incident. then last 2 days ago a guy shouted consistently some times Guher! El!. and last night also happent. a guy shouted "guher! El!".  then a woman with trying to relax voice tone shouted "Ok!".   

ok this were severely creepy moment of my life.  i would tell from start whom are i dont know but i would never come(to the ;pelpole whom shouted El come either 1 month ago or 15 days ago. ). cause whom ever would ever want to be ever any test subject ever:D i mean thats severe creepy:D

 

i dont think i am any psychic either. if psychics exist i dont think i am one of them. 

 

 

but retrorecognitions first cards first 6or 7 cards persistent correct prediction rate shocked me. i dont exactly remember the rate but were very good. then it went to 0 prediction level afterwards. i think i dont have any psychic skills and i dont think 8 over 25 is any significant result either.  but i tested since i got curious to since some guy consistently shouted El last days some times. that i know its a very weird incident. i also think its very weird. and of course i would never reply nor come to that El shouting person. never ever. whom ever wants to be any ever any test subject in this 50 or 60 years of life time ()i guess my life time to be like this due to my stress levels. if such tech to live 200s or 400s  features wouldnt get developed awhile. )

 

but i got interested agin cause idea of trying to find identity of stalkers slanderers with such stuff seems very interesting again. the only problem in not being able to solve that issue is i dont even know whom the stalkers slanderers are.  but mahybe if i focus on these stuff maybe i get clues on information on whom they are. i dont think such things happen in life and i dont think ESP ever exists. but its fun i think. and interesting. so i would try. it would be severely fun if i could learn whom are the stalkers slanderers with that:)

my weird experiences that i found weird were as:

now since i am in trauma in lesser level i dont find them that weird as i used to find them as. but in trauma;s higher levels, i were much prone to belief as they seemed weird. right now as i am alot out of trauma, it feels not any weird. and seems to me as psychics i dont think exist. there is really corrletaion to how much prone to believe in teleological stuffs and how trauma you are in. in these thype of topics. i think this teleological mood in my life resulted from being in trauma. now i think mroe like, i dont think i believe in psychics now. but they could exist surely. its just my view on this topic changed and i am less prone to believe such stuff now. 

my before i called weird now i see just usual statistics workings not any weirdness as:

first one: i read a function name in a studying book and the other day the news anchor person said an incident with a word that exactly looked like that. but for another place. this is not that weird any. 

second one; a retrorecognition one i think if it were psychic. i think just statistical hiccup not any psychic topic.  in this one: i did a sculpture but couldnt do good as i wanted. then hair unwantedly resembled Leia's hair style alot. then i thought wov at least hair looks good like Leia's. then the next day i heard Leia passed away. i think if it were a psychic topic it would be retrorecognition. that sensing someone having passed away topics i mean. but i think its just statistical hiccup. 

then lots of such stuff.

for instaqnce i blogged i like spy movies and other day i learnt James Bond actor has passed away in the other day. and passed away earlier. if it were a psychic stuff it would have been retrorecognition. 

but weirdest ones one of them is Tony Shieh. cause, i bought zippos to myself. then either that day or other day i learnt Zappos founder were in coma for a while and passed away the day the day before. i said what the heck in this one. 

 

so maybe El! shoutings happent due to this Zappos topic. might be. i dont any know.  if it were psychic stuff then i would think i would be a retrorecognition type of person. 

or precognition also. since one day i blogged i like cakes. the other day i read in news that someone passed away in cake eating contest. ut were all very creepy.

or this one very creepy and very tragic like all: and even much more i think:S. i blogged i am going to painting course with an Anna named person. then listened a music in which i mkisunderstood words in my head as burning like stuff whilst turned out i misunderstood that there were no such song words. but then in that night a very creepy and very tragic incident news came with hearing a passing of awesome  admired people.  like all other admired people in retrorecognition topics i listed. 

i think this is just statistical hiccups. but what is not statistical hiccups is some people shouted me "El! come!" like 15 days or 30 days ago. and last days some guy shouts El! and for instance said:  Guher! El! then a woman said Ok! with relaxing tone.this is none relaxing. to me this is very creepy. so i watched again the movie about El to morning to know how psychic topics are till morning. 

one other weird topic. i played zombie tsunami in taxi to reduce my usual autism related extra anxiety in that moment. playing games takes away that anxiety of autgism when you feel autism anxiety or that feeling of over excitment feeling. this happens routine in our lives. in outside most actually. not that frequent. not in places you are used to. but in a polace if you enter and is kind of feels crowded or populated, you might feel stressed kidn of.  but playing games,  one trick i learnt. that solves this issue of anxiety of that moment. anyway by then; i hadnt played that game for many ages.  maybe 8 or 9 months. than in evening i learnt in Turkey a tsunami happent that day:S but not that weird coincidence i think. i think its just statistical hiccup again. 

one weird topic were, i watched a movie in bus where things were falling in a persons house type. then i came home. then i slept that night and woke up with falling of a glass large stuff that fell from ceiling floor and it fell and created a lot noise with spreading to all 3 stairs of home with a huge sound. it happent since the rolled carpet that mom and dad put had lost its balance. but were kind fo weird. then other morning mom shouted from room since a small bird flow to room and hit her head. from a small opening in net that covers balcony door the small bird somehow entered.  this were also happening in movie. then i asked whether if this is a simulation. or that really aliens or simualtor creators whether if they exist and does such stuff to make such coincidences.  

one other stuff were i blogged about Trinity.  then the tv show that night told about Trinity. in there tv shows dont tell alot about Trinity since is not from common culture there.  so i said this is weird at that moment.

one other time. i were saying tthis stuff doesnt happent for long ages. this weird coincidences like this. then opent anthropologyu podcasts i like alot. first podcast i ddnt liked. then other one i opent and from verty last pages of the podcasts (very earlier years, its sorted by time) then the guy in podcast said kids sometimes forget plants household names. i felt as if guy said my kid to me cuase 1 hour ago i blogged i forgot my plants name. and the guy were an anthropology departments professor and giving a lecture. but the lecture were more about sociology topics and common base knowledge of sociology. this one were very weird.

ok when i tell these now it felt creepier to me. thinking last days some one shouting out El. ok now it feels creepier. as i written the feeling of these became again creepy like as if psychic exists. i felt as if doenst exists. but i still think psychics doesnt exist. i wouldnt let that El shouting creep me out. 

 

 

something weird happent 4 minutes ago. something like if earthquake happent like some wave came offrom ground if the building happent something. a vibration of weird stuff. in 3 moinutes ago. and it passed all. like some wave stuff. did an earthquake happent. 

i changed my place asap. like somehting like feelable wave. like some streong wave type like earthquake but not earthquake either. might as well be a tiny earth quake. were very weird this momenbt. i instantly right now changed my place.  since that were scary. 

 

what else more scary to me is those El shoutings that happent. even if it felt funny also last day saying what the heck kind of moment. now it felt very scary as this wave topic happent 2 mintus ago.  

or it were kind of an earhquake vibrationimpacting buildings and creating some such tihng. but it were also in air. it passed very quickly. it wernt like earth quake. but might be. were very weird so i placed myself to a place thats more distant to windows now.

i think since is an old building sometimes this happens. like some vibration on road or such creates vibration on building.

but seemed as a strong wave that can even be felt. even like as if had sound. not like earthquake. weird. nope i think it must be earthquake like stuff. that buidling vibrated due to tiny earthquake or vibrationi in buildings structure. but yet still i moved to the most distant corner of the room that is not in windows level now :P i think it must be just vibration of building nothing else. 

i think these topics are just statistical hiccups. these above topics i mentioned. i think happens in everyone else's life and but people dsnt focus. injust obseerved that i saw. if people observe they would see these type of coincidences always happens. i think its like that, if you observe you tend to find out such topics. it happens i think in everyone else's life such topics i mention but they arent giving attention to so they dont see. if you be more attentive i think these type of stuff happens in everyone else's life.  i think its just statistical hiccups. now i also think its normal and not creepy. i think its just statistical hiccups.

but what are creepy: that El! come! shouting happent 15 days or such days ago and some days some guy shouts "guher! El!". this is severely creepy topic. 

other creepy topic is some army retiree guy saying if octopus doesnt return to aquarium would be taken apart to pieces. some guy written such quora artilce i dont know.

i made joke of octopus i am not any pshichc and i hadnt seen psychic aquariums ever and would never ever want to see either. thats the creepiest stuff i ever saw in my life.

its all from that were from in twitter: i saying i am octopus. then i see later 2 hours ago actually acolleague said army building octopus robots. then many years later maybe one month ago i read that post in quora which felt severelyt creepy. i think that guy might be insane maybe. oir just coincidence of topics. 

i 3 years ago, got interested whether i could learn stalker slanderers identities if i were been a pshychic. so i did some tests: like there were a narrow road in bilkent to workplace. i used a side road which has less road. then in the road there were some corner thats very narrow that you dont see from far whether any car is coming from the other side of road. then i would try to predict if car would popup or not when i would pass. we everyone we slow down when coming to that corner. in first 2 i predicted ok but later not any. 

but yet still i wanted to try to learn if remote viewing like stuff exists. so i written some name (that stalkers used a name you know  i told thousand times, stalkers stalked me with lots of names that i hadnt even understood in first 1.5 years of stalk slander incidents. if it were in place of me, you wouldnt also understand, these maniacs are so expert in sociopathy that whom stalked slandered me. then that woman name i written on clay and added question mark. then i tried to remote view but nothing happent. not any thing at all. i tested remote viewing stuff like that. and i think i have none. i think thse topics arent real. i think its just beleifs but not facts. i dont think psychics exist. but i also test. myself sometimes. that woman name, these stalkers slandered me as a bitch with the security guys' 2 names. and then alsio slandered me with a woman name with an added prefix to secuirty guys' first name. and also other names. i had no idea about this naming scheme of stalkers in first 1.5 years or 2 years. cause they dont interact, all they do is they come sit in another desk and stalk slander. that all. so its not any easy to understand slander topic. i myself could understood after 1.5 years hundreds of stalk slander incidents in cafes in 2 incidents i started to understand this naming sociopathy of these stalkers slanderers. i thought for instance that name is stalking me. i before all thought i have a severe stalker issue. but never understood the slander part. anyway, in that remote viewing test, i bu then were unaware of the naming scheme sociopathy of these stalkers slanderes. so thought that there from stalkers such woman name is stalkingme. so written the name to clay with a question mark. but nothing happent. i have none remote viewing i think. 

now i got interested back again to trying to find out identities of the stalkers slanderers people. it would be fun if i were a psychic and via psychic skilss i could learn whom these people are.

i remember i once tried also in bath trying to find out but nothing worked. i have none such stuff.

 

and i think these topics arent even real i mean psychic topics. i think its like beliefs. its not facts. its just beliefs i think psychicb topics are.  

personally i dont think psychics exist. but i think i would find it fun to test if i am. and it would be severely happy to do detectiving on the stalkers to learn their identities via that way. ok lets try again. but dont know how to do those remote viewing stuff. i dont any know.

it would be severely happy if i could find out their identities via that way. so that i could init a law sue finally. for the stalking slandering topic which consistently hapepnt for 5 years. 

ok i would investigate remote viewing topic. on to learn how its done. i already watched el's movie to see if there are some clues on how these stuff are done. 

i am pretty sure i am nto anyn psychic. btu would be fun to test to learn identities of the stalkers slkanderers that tortured my life with stalk and slander for 5 years. normally i forgive everything in life thats done to me. if you break my heart, i would forget at most in 2 hours or 3 hours. i dont fixate to negative stuff in life. but this topic i dont forget and i dont forgive. cause they stolen my life years peace happiness from me with stalking and alndering me. so this topic is nto to be forgotten. but any other stuff you would do to me i would forgive everytime. unless you torture me with stalking and slandering me for 5 years,  i would forgive everything. i just wanted to note i mean i wish i dont be seen as someone who fixates in negative stuffs that happens unluckily to them. but this topic is divergin in the sense it were torture. of stalk and slander. consistently for 5 years. so i wont forgive. and i if learn whom they are i would create a legal sue. i dont even know whom they are.

but it would be happy to retry this remote viewing stuff to learn their identities if possible. 

ok today El shouting ddnt happent. good. cause its very creepy. 

ok maybe i should try to utilize if ever i have any psychic skills in this stalkers slanderer topics again. this El shoutings happent remembered me i could try that also. and it would be fun. they deserve to be sued. for slandering me with most impossible lies. so i decided they become my test subjects in this remote viewing task i assign to muself. but i think its not real these stuff like remote viewing or such i think are just beliefs but not facts. iu mean i dont think posychics any exist. its just like beliefs. not facts. and in science wise its pseudoscience and even anti science. so i dont believe anyn. but since i want to find out identities of the stalkers slanderers i would utilize this method now. ok i select test subjects as stalker slanderes group. but i dont even know whomthey are. i remember from stalk incidents some people's view. but many of them i wouldbt even look to the stalkers slanderers. but in soem opf them i seen and i remember. maybe that miught be my init point. ok.  ok test subject is a creepy word. i would use another name to learning identities of these maniac stalker slanderer people. test subject is rude. and feerls so creepy word. nope. ok i think it looked so cold and so unnice to even to those maniacs calling test subjects its just so creepy unnice feeling creator word. ok then lets call they as my first to be tried to be remote vieweds. to get to details of their lives so that i could investigate and learn whom they are. i dont even know whom they are. i woiuldnt either remote view anyother one else. its just done to solve this stalk slander torture. all i need is to know identities of them. to create legal sue. for that to happen now i would try remote viewing stuff in some free times in recent days. those maniacs whom slandered me with the most impossible lies, i wish i really i am a psychbic and figure out all of their identities via this silent detectiving way as if this topic happens in lkie movies. i dont know how remote viewing is done. and it would be so happy if it really woirks and i get to know their identities. and that i init the legal sue. yuppp. some trying to be a psychic time tio catch criminals. i think i could call these people as criminals since they did stalked slandered  harrassed me for 5 years with aqlso smear campaigns and i think its crime to do that. they might as well be criminals either. so catching criminals time!. some psychic detectiving time. these days. to test if i really have this psychic capability. i donty think i any have. but would be fun to test. since these stuff are fun.

first test with zener cards. retrorecognition got 8 over 25. by end of test it felt as prediction power diminished.t hen other tests i moved i couldnt predict any. after sometime it were like prediction power completely diminished.  first input to test of whether spychics exists and whether if i am one starts. beside the blockchain project either. but for that i would query also a lawyer. but it felt as severe fun to test remote viewing. ok but i dont think i have any such skill. cause i never confronted anything like that in my life. 

i dont think these stuff of telepathy or rmeoteviewing like stuff are any real. i think they are just beliefs. but not factual.i think only thing only conclusion i would come to wou,d be i dont have any such skill. i think i would figure out i dont have such skills.  i dont think i could do this. how could i learn name with remote viewing. i just if i think of a name how could i check if the name i thougth predicted is actually the stalkers name. there is no test way to check credibility of this method. it seems as an impossible quest even from start due to these. i mean how could one remote view and learn name of some people. i cant think any idea. but would think&would try.  maybe it works. who knows. there is no wrong in trying out. 

but again i think psychics dont exist. i thiknk this topic is not any factual. its just beliefs based topic i think. its reality is pseudoreality not tested. 

personally i dont think its real. i dont think psychics exists. but i also have no stigmas against testin git. i am ok with testing whether i am a psychic or not. some positivism tendencies sometimes stigmatize these type of tests. for being not scientific. ok i also feel like that its not ok and not scientific anyn. but i would try to not be a severe positivist and would give possibility to the chances that these stuff also exist. even if i dont believe thqat these type of stuff exist. i ythink psychics topics is not any real but its just belief systemsbeliefs. or maybe it exists. haivng a nonbiased attitude in this remote testing tries i would check out. to try to remote view thos stalker slanderer maniacs. (whom stalked slandered me with all impossible lies for 5 years)

ok adding a very weirdo task to my life. but surely i wouldnt be biased on to positivism and would give chances that psychis might exist really. 

but i repeat i dont believe that exists. it feels illogical. but i am not biased strongly either. it might exist. our physical frameworks arent that yet advanced. aas i also saw. maybe psychics topics also have their own explanation in physics yet to be invented areas. so lets be unbiased in init of this task and not get to that lightweighted mood of saying nope psychics dont exist. no they can exist. our frameworks are yet at some level. but it might as well turn out just belief not reality not fact this psychics topics. or might as well, maybe psychics happens to exist but i am not any one of them, so tests might fail, but this wont mean any significant information regarding evidences analysis of both sides of this topic. i think might test wouold mean nothing. cause as well psychics might be really true topic and but just because i am not one of them, i might see that tests i would try fails. or reversely maybe psychics stuff are not real but just beliefs. who knows.  i would be unbiased. 

lets try to find the identities of stalkers slanderers with testin remote viewing. so that i could finally init a law sue againt their 5 years stalk slandering wiht all impossible lies. 

 

ok i doint think i am any psychuc cause i cant do remote viewing.  but i want justice happen so mucjh(that i sue these slanderers with a law sue) that i would try more.  but in my first try of remote viewing wiht focusing my rememberance of what i see in slander incidents sme of them in which i seen the slanderers clearly. idont forget this info. i focus on this info to get to know clues. but i see it feels illogical to me also. this remote viewing topic. i mean whilst i try to do it it feels also illogical. nbut lets try more cause i want to see justice happen. that i learn identities of the slanderers and sue them. only topic that blocks this is that i dont know whom they are. i even dont believe to remote viewing, since i wish to sue them and want to learn their identities, would retry many times. but in init i felt its very illogical at all. not any task that usual commonsense fits. like thinking of a person and trying to think what is where is and somehow reach identity of via that. the problem is that i dont have any testing method. i can think person as somewhere or could think name of person but have no ways to test it. i dont have any credibiility of dayta i predict from this remote viewing task. that is not ok. maybe i prepare some network downloader to download some images from some contexts. and then i try to predict those images peoples names and places etc or contexts. if this happens in high truth rate then i guess i could have a bayesian method. ok. i think first i need to train self and test the success rate and upon valiudation of success rate i would try to predict identities of these stalkers slandereers that stalked slandered for 5 years. ok. this now feels a more credible methodology. first lets increase prediction rates success level. from batch of tests. then do the actual tests as success rates if increase and becomes better than random guessing like stuff. it still feels very illogical task i cant get away from this is very illogical feeling. but kind of this way of it feels kind of more logical. ok lets get a web crawler to crawl images to let me predict names of people there. ok this again felt severely illogical. but i need those stalker slanderers names so much to be able to init sue. so even the illogical methods like this i would try out.  i would try to bypass this feels so illogical feeling.

ok in tandem in other project,  its more scientific (i guess psychic topics are pseudo science or i a;lso saw scientific approaches to that either).  in other project i also have guess its nonce guessing but not via psychic ways in that but just computation. that also continues. 

but i wiuld also test this psychic name prediction testing method. that i try to predict name and surname of the people whom stalked slandered me from what i saw in stalk slander incidents.

today El shoutng didnt happent. maybe they are such topci believers like psychics. but not people whom does such tests. but in any sense people whom did shouted like that (El come shouting happent) seemed severely creepy. today hadnt happent.

ok i want to sue the stalkers so i would try out this remote viewing stuff. or might create bitcoin project and hire detectives and detectives learns that for me. i would eaither get to reach to identity of the stalkers slanderers peoiple and init a legal sue. cause they neverendingly tortured my life with stalk and slandering for 5 years. first task: learning their identities. final task: creating huge legal sues against.  cause it is not ok to do smear campaigns character assasintn named stuffs. and this were done to me for 5 years. so my main goal is to create huge sues to them. but first need to learn whom are they. i dont know that unluckily. 

 

this is severe creepy. someone shouts me El! sometimes. they whomever are should knoiw i would never ever come. whom would ever want to be any test subject ever in life:S

i think these are all statistical hiccups. causdes 40 years ago it were proved that these stuffs dont exist and is pseudoscience completely. i think its just statistical hiccups. 

i now see that all my view point to these topics were related to trauma. i