ok i think i might misunderstood and philosopher isnt interested to friendship with me any.

ok.   but were taking my blog. so were kind of confusing. ok i thought were wanting to be friend. 

but i liked idea of haviung a philosopher friend with whom to discuss philosophy with.  

i have 0 friends now. i wish to build lots of friendships. from every sector. including philosopher friends :D  (this philosopher person i sent friend request from here i thought is a therapist turned out is a surgeon. ) but i thinki overreacted with happiness of finding a philosophy liking friend possibility. but now the epiphany of finding a funny philosopher friend idea is gone because i dont even know what kind of person is that i sent friend request from my blog. just i never had any philosopher friends whom also talks funny sentences before. so i quite got happy for thinking i found a funny and philosopher friend. but as i think, i dont even know the person i send friend request to. so i thinki overreacted with writing lots of words aboout this. 

ok i think this i also related to having none friends for 5 years near to none. i stopped communcating with people whilst in trauma. so finding a funny friend whom talked funny sentences seemed very happy idea. but now i think i dont even know the person so its irrational to be happy for that for finding a friend possibility.

i really need friends. i missed friendships alot.  and i dont know where to find. whilst being agoraphobic. ok i guess  i would find when i socialize. i want lots of friends from lots of sectors. from art/from philosophers/from coders/from maths/from physics/from other sectors. 

hmm i now see i overreacted:) since i missed friendships alot. i had before lots of funny friends in my life. like 5 years ago it were like taht. seeing someone talking funny sentences remembered my 5 years ago friendhships.  now its i think now i have i  think none friends since i been agoraphobic due to trauma of having confronted character assasination.  

 

but ok lets find other philosopher friends to discuss Lewis later if this person is not interested to discuss with me. i really liked the idea of finding philosopher friends. like cross blogging from blogs self written articles about philosophy.  ok i wish i hadnt misunderstood and that person is really a friend. hadnt read last posts of contents either yet.  if is a friend, i would be very happy to discuss various philosophy area topics with and talk to. i really liked the idea of discussing from cross blogs with someone philosophical articles beside.   but i might misunderstood and might not be interested to be any friend of me. it would been awesome to have a funny philosopher friend whom says funny sentences sometimes and talks also philosophy. i like friends funny talks alot. i missed that. that humor/funny words of friendships.  one topic i missed alot in my life.

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ok i oculndt study this night. and i am quite unhappy for discovering i got really fat little bit. ok tomorrow would start diet. no matter project is ongoing with stress or not, tomorrow diet would start. cause i have a belly. i am not used to having a belly. 

 

 

for project side i would continue now the task of today with some coffeine drink. 

this part of project is making some layer be working with akka. i had previously added akka but with some differnt component. this part's testng is stressing. if testrs goes smoothly it means i could build fastly. i expect it to work since i unittested on sunday and thought and rethought reviewed the code also.  ok maybe since i am yawning i should wake early tomorrow and start to code in early morning.