yep last sunday were 7th day of losing my dear dad and on that day there also had been meal giving in home (this time from other relative) again. but seems as this period of relatives constantly giving meals in home has ended. 

so today I have time to study to ml algos visibly. day again started with long thoughts of our family's loss (my dearest dad) last 60 days. :S had lost in thoughts like what if we went to another oncologist would it be not like this like helpless thoughts then i gave up thinking since there is nothing to do save him now :S

its that most possibly it would have happent like this if we went to other oncologist. but again one gets lost in thoughts of. Since his cancer were stage 4 most possibly we would lose him but again queries like. 

in my multiverse theory its not very possible to alter already happent universes. where which every universe version of past present already exists. thereby no matter what multiverse technology i would have developed, its impossible to alter universes maybe. so as my consciousness lived through this sad universes since stage 4 cancer of my dad probability of survival were not much that in many universes we lose him (due to current med tech not capable of saving stage 4 cancer patients in most cases) 

that unfortunately also sad universe versions also happens. there is nothign to fix it possibly or maybe it might be possible to alter it so that sad universe versions do not happen maybe. 

but again that might not be possible. 

i mean if i invented time travel to a universe version to save my dad from cancer medicine with future med tech, thene the universe i time traveled normally wouldnt be the same universe version but a new universe version other than sad universe version that in which we lose my dad to cancer :S

so maybe in some universe versions my dad is saved/living healthily and that is providing some sort of relief to my mind. 

but still, would it be possible to somehow modify all universes? maybe possible? i mean could physical laws of universe of mumltiverses be overwritten/edited/changed?

I mean normally visibly multiverse works most possibly alike, all possible universes of past present already happening existing. with some regimen of physical laws of entropy and so etc in this regimen of universes with these set of entropy laws...  and would it be possible to edit these underlying (e.g. aka analogies to string theory but only as analogy) physical regimen of physics laws so that conditions like following be created? 

e.g. nonexistance of sad universe versions? (e.g. deletion of universe versions which we lose my dad? )

or editing of universe versions that somehow my dad is revived and became healthyfrom cancer somehow? 

 dunno yet. maybe possible? maybe not. dunno. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

there is this regret of : at some time point my dad insisted to return back to istanbul (to his oncologist there thinking it might be better since is from cancer treatment hospital entirely )  but i told mom and dad could go to istanbul but i would stay here (since i dont like living there)  and i think mom also thought as oncologist here also applies same treatment, mom also wanted to stay here. and this regret really bothers my mind severely. if i were aware of criticallity of my dad's condition, i would surely make sure he goes to istanbul to his specific cancer hospital with insisting to my mom and dad (even if doctor here did same treatment either)  although even if oncologist applied same treatment also here.  I just think and get lost in what ifs. what if he went to istanbul, would doctors there could detected this metastasis condition faster? (he went to entire cancer hospital there) or could they saved his condition of stage 4? i were unaware of criticality of condition:S we were both unaware:S since in last scan of cancer situation, it were mentioned the cancer has became 20% less and so we thought he were healing like before. we had no idea of this worsening condition :S

i think cancer literacy is something important, to know cancer even if 20% regressed in one scan does not mean person is healing on healing from cancer path :S we lacked this knowledge :S we thought everything is going better and he is being healed. :S 

gosh this regret is very bothering my mind. would if i insisted them very much insistingly to go back to istanbul, would he be saved from stage 4 worsened condition there? 

:S

so for last 1.5 or 2 hours i were thinking this :S

with tears in my eyes now:S

lack of cancer illness progression literacy is very unnice :S  we had not even slightest had the idea of worsening condition :S since the last scan(3 months ago or so) were like 20% reduction,  we were very hopeful that he is healed and he would be very much healed after 8th chemoherapy session :S

turns out at some point chemo stopped being working. this is said to happen in many stage 4 cancer conditions(as I had read some weeks ago of critical ill cancer situations). in such cases, chemo sometimes stop working and oncologist either raise dose etc or try other stuff(as read 1 week ago when reading of critically ill cancer patients topiucs). but in this case, we were unaware of worsening condition. since scans are also detrimental and could be done per every 3 months frequency at most.  its visible cancer healing tech specifically scan tech also needs to become much better so that even per day scan becomes available to early detect nonworking treatment type. current global med tech uses some detrimentalprocedure which then can only be applied at per 3 months periods frequency at most.  

seems as current med tech in world even saves alot cancer patients lifes (it luckily saves most cancer patients lifes), its not very much yet capable of saving stage 4 patients alike and rarely saves stage 4. 

no worries we would develop much more better scan method (which would scan dna/rna by quantum computers based med devices)  

its that these quantum computer tech is newly developed tech and would solve the cancer conundrum.  (e.g. scanner which can scan only once per 3 months)

I mean medicine sector already had done in globe whats most available in solving cancer conundrum without existence of quantum computers. (I just did not meant med tech in globe is insufficient in saying its incapable of fixing stage4 cancer. it can do the most can be done yet without quantum computers. to solve cancer conundrum fully requires some new physics and new computers. not exactly new pohyics but QFT based new medical devices other than existing tech which we humans most possibly can not easily innovate but could be innovated via ml systems running with quantum computers. I mean there are limits to human innovation skills. existing human innovation skills did whatever it can in fight against cancer but it requires more than human innovation skills to fix cancer conundrum.  I mean it requires quantum computers, new particle physics based devices innovated by ml algorithms etc etc. its out of we humans intellectual capability to invent such systems so i did not wanted to say degradative things to existing cancer med tech in previous paragraphs when saying it can not fix stage 4 cancer. i meant humans did whatever possivble to fix cancer conundrum in med tech and saves lots of cancer patients lifes of course.  but it requires more than human intellectuality to fix cancer conundrum is what i meant. i mean new technologies built based on human intellectuality/human inventions but exceeding human's intellectual capabilities. 

  

but its unfortunate such med tech yet not exists and I lost my dad. 

but no worries, we would develop such tech surely.

for saving my dad from cancer which we lost in this universe versions, i would investigate multiverse technologies as mentioned.  but dunno if universe deletion (deletion of universes which we lose my dad) is possible or not? maybe possible or maybe not? since in normal setting, all universe versions of every past/present always exist. dunno if its possible to delete sad universe versions (e.g. universe versions in which our family loses my dad to cancer:S) from multiverse. we would check/see. we would try best to save my dad from cancer with interfering to every universe version with bringing future cancer medicine tech to every universe version which my dad has cancer. but then the problem is, it wont be same universe in that case and eigen states of sad universe versions whichwe lost my dad to cancer would stay same. :S  so its not known whether its possible to time travel to a past universe version to bring future medicine. since it wont be the same universe version after that. but maybe deletion of sad universe versions is possible maybe? dunno. we would check. and i would do my best to save my dad from cancer in multiverse accordingly. (since i(& all our family) love my dad infinitely much. ) 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------