i think our funeral traditions in Turkey are quite nice.

since thinking if i and my mom were alone in this period, it would be much sad.

last 5 days we constantly had relative guests until late hours for funeral (every day some relative creates some meal to entire relatives visitors in our house) 

we had not had time to even scratch our hair like constant flux of relatives visitors in our house had been like last 5 days and I spent alot of time with my very funny cousins either, so it really helped the getting used to after-funeral period of severe sadness period. 

I already had got over grief period with funny cousins funny jokes last 5 days. we never been alone any last 5 days and had constant flux of relatives visitors. 

first day we had prepared(from food company) meal to guests then second day also. and then 3rd day when some relative had  prepared I were like gosh wish she had not. since i mean i thought we are tired! (since meals are served in our funeral house and we and my cousins help being waiters/waitresses during) then 4th day another relative generated this time. but 4th day guest count were less so were much lesser waiter/waitress work to do whilst serving relative guests meals /teas/deserts etc etc. then i thought yayyy finally waiter/waitress time is over then today again meal happent this time from another family relative (and of course again in our house)  but today's waiter/waitress tasks were again not much. since as mentioned relative guests counts were less since outside city relative guests has already left. 

i thought this is too tiresome to be funeral home but then turns out its actually helps to alleviate sadness (overcrowded house setting) since it really helps forgetting sadness since one does not usually have time to mourn other than serving relative guests :) and also my cousins are severely funny people and usually lost myself in laugh to their jokes/satires so i think its nice that funeral tradition is like this. 

I am sure i would have passed this week much more sad if we only had relative guests only on monday and tuesday. imho even if i sometimes found it kind of tiredness creating situation (but i also rest since there is lots of cousins helping these tasks of tea serving/meals serving/desert etc etc) but then i think its also nice in the sense, i had not had time to mourn alot. which also made this unnice getting used to loss of family member period be pass much less hard. 

i think to lose a family member to cancer is both severely sad and very traumatic(in terms of sadness and feeling helpnessless situation and very severe sadness)   really very traumatic. (e.g. to see family member in ICU with ventilator and doctors giving no hope (Since current med tech in world does not have technology to fix his metastasis and metastasis caused organ failure situation :S )   kind of really severe traumatic(due to sadness and current med tech being not able to heal such cases of metastasis) to me/my mom and my dad's brothers families etc)  and specifically I/we his family love him infinitely much. so it were severely traumatic condition to us last weeks to see my parent critically ill with even with ventilator (that lungs has stopped due to multiple organ failures :S) . it were really very hard time/period to us. its like our hearts bleeded of suffering/pain last weeks. it we undefeinably suffering of sadness last many weeks to us (me/my mom/my dad's entire big family whom we every day visited in ICU to see such condition of critically ill condition of my lovely dad :S it were undefinable level of pain to us since we love him infinitely much and seeing him needing ventilator to breath and doctors saying multiple organ failure due to cancer metastasis and giving no hope were severely sad undefineble levels sad. (and helplessness feeling since curent med tech has no technology to healsuch critical condition cancer patients :S) )   

but then when all family gathered in funeral in many consecutive days, it really helped alot to get over the grief/sadness. 

In first day I felt very much sadness and then second day also and third day also. but fourth day (on thursday) I started to get over grief some and today also. i think its because of that we were not alone and we had constantly were surrounded with relatives all last many days. eg many times i got lost to lauyghing to cousins jokes. so that being surrouinded with family were awesome thing that happent during this very sad time.